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I guess I’m alone in this

I’m pregnant and my partner wanted me to get an abortion, I couldn’t do it, I tried but cancelled the appointment after coming to terms with it. Now my partner (ex partner who knows at this stage) is angry because I went back on our decision. I’ve told him that he doesn’t have to be apart of this baby’s life, he can walk away. I’m just feeling so alone in this. I have no one to talk to. I don’t know what he wants, what is happening between us. I don’t want to keep asking anymore of him. I feel guilty about it all. He has left me confused, hurt and angry.

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Answers (13)

If he's willing to leave you because you are carrying HIS child then he is not partner or dad material anyway. Good riddance to him. If you were to get an abortion like he wants then he'd probably find something else to leave you over later on down the track and the relationship would fall apart eventually anyway, then you'd really regret giving into his demands to abort your baby as you'd have no baby and no relationship.
Good on you for standing up for what you want despite the deadbeat. You'll be a great mummy xxx

OP Thank you xx you are so right about everything
helpful (3) 

Us woman are strong as f**k! You can do this! This little baby is going to have a warrior as a Mum. A big hug to you!

OP Thank you xx
helpful (2) 

Stay strong! F**k him, keep your baby, you will not regret it, but you will defo regret an abortion you didnt really want.

OP I really needed to hear this. Thank you xx
helpful (1) 

I came here yesterday in tears and feeling so alone. Now I’m crying different tears, happy tears, thanks to the support from all of you. I may not know any of you but you have all just made me feel so much less alone in this and have given me the strength I need to stand by my choice. Thank you all so much from the bottom of my heart xx

 You are going to make a wonderful mother! Try and do something special for yourself today :) ... You are carrying a very lucky baby indeed! ❤️
helpful (5) 
 You've made my day, I'm glad you are feeling better. I'm really happy for you, it might feel scary sometimes but you're beginning a whole new adventure 🌈
helpful (4) 
OP Thank you both so much xx
helpful (1) 

Hey I was in your exact same position. Except I wasn't as strong as you. I wish I was strong like you. I gave in to him. Had an abortion. It destroyed me. And my relationship. I broke up with him and had a breakdown. Got involved with drugs.
Finally all these years later my life is beautiful and rebuilt with a loving man and beautiful children. But my life at the time was destroyed by the termination.
Please be strong for your self and your baby. You can do it.
I'm not a religious person but I'll have you in my prayers to a higher being.
I wish you all The luck in the world. You're not alone. I wish I'd known i wasn't alone at the time.
We are proud of you, strong woman 🤗

OP I’m so sorry you went through all of that. Thank you for sharing your story. I hope you are alright now xx
helpful (1) 

Don't feel guilty. If anything it sounds like he was pressuring you to get the abortion. Your body your choice not his. Stay strong. Sending love xxx

OP Thank you xx
helpful (1) 

You’ve got this. This happened tome with my first baby-he is almost 19 now! You know in your heart what you want and what you can live with. You don’t owe this man anything. Someone that manipulates or coerces you into doing something that is against your heart is not looking out for your best interests, only his own short term needs or wants. Of course having a baby on your own is difficult at times but worth it if it means you are not compromising yourself in the process. Start reaching out to meet others, attend playgroups or mothers groups and start building your own support system or “ family”. I was lucky enough to have a few other single mother friends and we were absolute rocks for one another, emotionally and practically. You need to do what is right for you, you have to live with your decision, either way, forever. Best of luck to you.

OP Thank you for all the wonderful advice. I will start searching tomorrow xx
helpful (1) 

Been there done it, you’ll get through it. My son turns 11 and never met or spoken to his dad and he has stayed right out of his life

OP Thank you. You should be very proud of yourself xx
helpful (2) 

You will be ok. Give him some space to get his head around it, let him contact you if he wants to. If he keeps pressuring you to have an abortion block all contact with him.
You will be ok, forget your ex, you are going to have a baby congratulations!! Maybe Google support groups in your area, find someone to chat to.

My ex reacted the same way, he insisted I have an abortion as I had no right to have his child without his consent. I had moved away from my family to be with him, so I moved back. I did say I would terminate the pregnancy, because he was so insistent that I had to, I agreed but just packed up and left while he was at work. I didn't put him on the birth certificate, and haven't heard from him since.

 Another smart and awesome woman! Xxxx
helpful (1) 
OP Thank you. He messaged me this afternoon about it. He’s accepted my decision now. It still hurts that he left me over it.
helpful (1) 
 ^ sounds like he doesn't deserve you or your baby
helpful (2) 
 Does that mean he’s come around?
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 ^No. He messaged her and basically said - ok it's your decision to have the baby so I'm out of here. What a gutless prick
helpful (1) 

Feeling confused hurt and angry are totally normal emotions to experience given your circumstances. As time passes you will begin to feel more confident in your decision and ability to raise this baby on your own. In the meantime, talk to your healthcare team, GP, midwife etc they will be able to point you in the right direction in terms of additional services and support available to you. And go see a counselor to help you work through the barrage of emotions along the way.
You’ve got this!!!! You can do this, with or without a partner.

OP Thank you so much for all this wonderful advice. I have already booked in to see a counsellor.
helpful (2) 

That is his problem. Hold your ground. No one should bully you into doing something that you don't want to do. Either way it should be your choice not a decision that is forced on you. I say follow your heart. If you want to keep the baby than do so. If he doesn't want to be involved, that is his loss.

OP Thank you for saying this. I am very comfortable with my decision
helpful (1) 

Oh darling I'm so sorry Ur bloke is an a*s. Do you know in your heart whether or not you want to keep the baby?

OP Yes. I know in my heart I want to keep this baby, even if it means doing it alone.
helpful (5) 
 Then you made the right decision. Hang in there. It’s gonna be a long tough road ahead. But you will get through it.
helpful (5) 
OP Thank you xx
helpful (2) 

OP make sure you bump this post in 9mths and let us know the sex of Ur beautiful little angel 😇 💜

OP Yes I will make sure that when baby arrives I’ll update. If only we could post photos too xx
helpful (3) 
 Are you going to find out the sex?
helpful (1) 
 The sex of the baby doesn't matter as long as bubs is healthy
helpful (1)