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How would your husband react to a drunk guy coming onto you all night?

Answered 4 years ago

I had a big guy cracking onto me all night, reckons id been giving him signals WTAF? I had plenty of friends around and they didn't see my signals. Anyway, he told me he wanted to have sex with me and i obviously declined, then he started calling me a cocktease etc do you know what my husband did? Absolutely f#@$ing nothing! I had other guys trying to protect me and get the guy away from me in the end. So pissed off at my husband! I want to feel protected and cared about - apparently he told this guy to "go for it"! Im so angry and hurt and the the idea that this guy could have potentially tried to rape me or god knows what (he did have me cornered at one point) and hubby didn't care or was too drunk to care? But if i have a go at him about it he just gets shitty at me and says "yep, as always, im the bad husband"


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ANSWER
4 years ago
You're overreacting. I'm sure your husband didn't want to be smashed by this BIG guy. Be thankful your husband isn't in hospital with a smashed up face or on charges for assault then you'd be here calling him a moron for intervening. men just can't win

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REPLY
4 years ago
My husband would rather be in hospital with a smashed face or on charges for assault then to allow another man to harass and potentially rape me. It is disgusting that you are siding with the husband in this situation.


REPLY
4 years ago
You're drawing a very long bow with the potential rape claim. Stop branding all men as potential rapists. It's like saying all 'white' people are racist.

REPLY
4 years ago
^ I agree. Why does some asshole have to keep bringing rape. FFS

REPLY
4 years ago
* up

REPLY
4 years ago
She's being overly dramatic with the rape accusation which makes me wonder if she wasn't being overly dramatic about the whole incident

REPLY
4 years ago
Sad :(

ANSWER
4 years ago
If you were at a mutual friends house then the best thing to do is tell the host you feel uncomfortable with the comments and could they ask him to leave. If that does not happen you leave ask your husband to join you or leave him there. You will learn who your friends are or are not.

ANSWER
4 years ago
I have a friend who's husband uses the "I'm a bad husband, as always" line to make her feel bad. He is a total arsehole. She will ask him to do something that she is unable to do herself. Eventually after asking for help a few times over a number of days she gives up and gets someone else to help her and then he chucks the shits and demands to know why. When she says well I did ask and you ignored me so I had to find someone who could.

Sounds like the OP husband is the same. Ignores his wife who was distressed and then chucks a tanty and tries to make her feel bad when called out on it.

ANSWER
4 years ago
Mine would definitely tell him to back off and if he persisted he'd probably knock him out. He wouldn't sit there and tolerate it

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REPLY
4 years ago
Yep mine too. He's very protective

REPLY
4 years ago
This is how a decent, loving husband would react.

ANSWER
4 years ago
Knee him in the balls

ANSWER
4 years ago
Why didn't you leave?
Why didn't YOU cause a scene if his man was making YOU uncomfortable? It's about YOU and YOUR reactions. Perhapse your husband disn't know if you wanted to be saved. Or if you needed help. Maybe he thought you were dealing with it okay. Maybe he was waiting for YOU to say something to him about the other guys behaviour. Men aren't mind readers. Obviously he already feels pretty hard done by in the relationship hense his comment. Maybe to the men you were giving out signals. Men and womens brains are wired differently. A touch a comment can all be interpreted the wrong way. It is up to YOU and you alone atthe end of the day to stand up for yourself boydriend, partner, husband or not they are not there to save you.

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REPLY
4 years ago
You sound like you've been married for all of 5 minutes

REPLY
4 years ago
Sound like it was written by a disgruntled male

REPLY
4 years ago
Lol

REPLY
4 years ago
I totally agree with this, if op was raped would she blame her husband for not saving her?
Very true that men read signals differently, women notice a lot faster if another woman is hitting on her man.

REPLY
4 years ago
Not male and married 15 years. Dont need my husband to rescue me asI dont give mixed signals .

REPLY
4 years ago
I stand by my above comment ladies we are in charge of what we fo. If you are uncomfortable say something or leave. Dont wait to be rescued get out of the situation.

ANSWER
4 years ago
Another guy wouldn't dare come near me if hubby is there. He's big and tough but what the others don't know is that he's very sweet and gentle on the inside

ANSWER
4 years ago
My ex's friends used to try it on me. He'd always blame me saying that it's "not their fault because you give out a vibe that you want to fuck." He was such a maggot, he treated me like dirt.

My husband now would give the bloke a warning, maybe two and after that he'd teach him a few manners.

I'm glad I moved on from the gaslighting academic elitist pig and made way for my real man, one who i have true love and an unbreakable bond with.

Your husband was being an unprotective child and he needs to wake up to himself, you don't deserve shit like that.

ANSWER
4 years ago
I'm not sure what hubby would do as we don't really go out anywhere someone would be hitting on me. But I don't really need him to do anything as I'd tell the guy to piss off (I'd be polite first) and if he didn't I'd get security if that was an option. Otherwise we'd just leave. And if he had me corned at some point and I wasn't feeling safe I'd probably knee him in the balls 🤷‍♀️

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REPLY
4 years ago
*cornered. Doh! 🤦‍♀️

REPLY
4 years ago
We were at a private residence. Mutual friends of the host

REPLY
4 years ago
In that case I would have hoped the hosts would tell him to leave! Otherwise yeah, we'd just leave, and make it very clear why.

REPLY
4 years ago
If that’s the case the host should have dealt with it!!!

ANSWER
4 years ago
It sounds like he was scared, and now embarrassed about it. Hopefully the reason the host didn't ask him to leave was because they were scared too, but that's a shitty situation to leave a friend in. I hope you are ok, at least you know to make sure the jerk won't be there next time you go.

ANSWER
4 years ago
He’s acting like a single man

ANSWER
4 years ago
He sounds like he feels underappreciated maybe he was trying to show you that you should appreciate him more then he might show up for you in such situations like this. Sounds like he's checking out.

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REPLY
4 years ago
What?!

REPLY
4 years ago
He says "yep as always I'm the bad husband" that's very telling about his state of mind in the relationship.

ANSWER
4 years ago
Ideally I think you should have both left. The guy was probably angling to pick a fight with your DH. There are types like that.

ANSWER
4 years ago


Your man was possibly intimidated by him. Why do we always feel the need to be protected? your hubby probably couldn’t protect himself from this bloke! Bringing it up constantly with the poor me attitude is not going to help the situation!
No doubt hubby feels shit enough already

ANSWER
4 years ago
Then maybe they shouldn't be such dicks all the time