My husband never wants to do anything with our kids
Answered 10 days ago
Long story short, my husband never wants to do anything with our kids. Everything is too much of an effort, doesn’t even want to take them outside to play. Would rather sit inside on his phone. They never want him in return and he wonders why. I am not a prefect parent but at least i try my best to do everything i can for them. He is always yelling at them or making me feel on edge. He can be a great dad - but this is minority of the time. He does barely anything at home in terms of housework. I feel like i have 3 kids. Would love to leave but i am too scared. I have nothing financially and don’t want my children to suffer.
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Only you can decide what is best for yourself and your children.
It's possible your husband has some mental health stuff going down. Maybe get him to speak to his GP or get a trusted mate of his to have chat with him.
Did his parents do things with him or take him
It's possible that this is difficult for him because he missed out on this as a child himself.
Are his needs being met from an emotional point of view. Is he feeling loved, supported and valued as a person a husband and a father or is he just being told what he isn't doing well?
how is his social life and work life going? does he have an outlet that meets his needs or is I just works home.
It's an easy option just to pack the bags and walk out but it's not going to help anyone in the long run least of all the children?
Im just really curious as to what is happening for him and if you can work out whats not right youll be half way there. It's unlikely to be a you or the children thing but thats just an opinion
Sometimes you need to sit them down and explain in black and white, it worked for me I hope it could help you.
He now hasn't seen them for over a year and every so often i get a derogatory response via txt or email (nothing at all to do with the children)
Some people just like the safety net of a family to portray to the world they are great human being's...
I've now met a real man who's stepped up to the plate and has done more in the last 12 months then their own father did for them in 14 years.
Never ever lower your standards of simple expectations, especially when it comes to your children wellbeing and growth x best wishes
I did leave four years ago. It was tough going for the first 12 months, but the kids and I got through it. It really was a "short term pain for long term gain" thing.
Moving forward, the kids have never been happier. The best thing that I ever did
mental& financial abuse) - now I have left& are 100% happier & so are the kids. Unfortunately they have minimal relationship to their father but this is not my fault or problem. It is up to him to work that out. If you are un happy, leave. There will never be an easy time to leave, however you will always find a way to survive. Besides if you are pretty much doing it alone but with his dead weight holding you back you may as well do it alone & lose the 80kgs & feel so much lighter & happier!
Is he tired from work/depressed? Could you suggest he sees a psychologist? His behaviour is telling you there’s something up - or has he always been like this?
I too have no money or anything but iv come to realise that it's either accept that that's what he's like or leave.
Half the time men don't change their behaviours because they don't realise its a problem to start with!!!
That's why men and women are different. We think differently.