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Any other mums feel really anxious over their kids growing up
Answered 5 years ago
My kids just graduated primary school and start highschool next year and I've been overcome with stress or anxiety or nervousness over it. I'm worried about the choices they'll make in life, the heart break they'll have, the risks they'll take, but most of all I'm really sad that they were little babies not so long ago and suddenly they are young adults. Is this normal? My husband thinks I'm starting to get anxiety again because in his opinion I'm being ridiculous, but I don't know if it's just a natural motherly response or if he's right. I'm just so emotional about my babes growing up
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ANSWER
5 years ago
Normal! My kids are teenagers and I remember feeling like that at the end of primary school. Now I just worry about them going into adulthood.
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REPLY
5 years ago
This ^
ANSWER
5 years ago
I did not notice those home to school, or primary to high school milestones. But I was a very laid back Mum.
But I got a shock one day when a young policeman came to the door, and he looked exactly the same age as my son and stepson, but dressed in a smart uniform. They were 16 and 17 at the time, and had been through their big teenage growth spurt. It hit me like a brick.
I suddenly realised they were practically adults, not my babies any more. I think I was in shock for a couple of days.
You just have to trust that what you have taught them will prepare them well for each stage, and for independence.
The Jesuits used to have a saying: " give me the boy, and I will give you the man". They held that if you have a child until age 7, you set their ultimate adult behaviours, values, and beliefs.
Have faith that what you have taught them will give them the moral foundation they need.
And try and take active joy in the new stages, rather than fretting about whats past.
But I got a shock one day when a young policeman came to the door, and he looked exactly the same age as my son and stepson, but dressed in a smart uniform. They were 16 and 17 at the time, and had been through their big teenage growth spurt. It hit me like a brick.
I suddenly realised they were practically adults, not my babies any more. I think I was in shock for a couple of days.
You just have to trust that what you have taught them will prepare them well for each stage, and for independence.
The Jesuits used to have a saying: " give me the boy, and I will give you the man". They held that if you have a child until age 7, you set their ultimate adult behaviours, values, and beliefs.
Have faith that what you have taught them will give them the moral foundation they need.
And try and take active joy in the new stages, rather than fretting about whats past.
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REPLY
5 years ago
Oh dear my daughter is going to be a whiney adult LOL
REPLY
5 years ago
I disagree with that saying on so many levels as it promotes a fixed mindset and not a growth one. Just another thing private schools say to scare you into paying exorbitant fees.
ANSWER
5 years ago
Totally normal. Just a side effect of having smaller families these days. In previous times as soon as one moved to the next stage, you would be pregnant with the next baby.
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REPLY
5 years ago
right... so what size family doesn't have anxiety?
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5 years ago
I feel like she meant olden times
ANSWER
5 years ago
I worry about things they will have to deal with like drinking, driving, sexual assault etc. But I think over-worrying isn't going to help the issue you just have to listen to them and let them know you are there for them.
ANSWER
5 years ago
There are books on "raising resilient children". I think I have seen separate ones for raising boys and for raising girls, as their issues are different.
Maybe browse the bookshops get one of those, and that might help you immerse yourself in this next stage, The learning might help reduce your anxiety.
Maybe browse the bookshops get one of those, and that might help you immerse yourself in this next stage, The learning might help reduce your anxiety.
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REPLY
5 years ago
Just stay away from steve biddulf, what a fucking tool.
ANSWER
5 years ago
My eldest is 16 in May, the realisation hit that I only have a short amount of time left with her before she is an adult 😫
ANSWER
5 years ago
I had these feelings when my son started school. My anxiety was so bad I couldn’t sleep for weeks. I was so stressed that the greatest part of my life was over, a lil selfish yes but you can’t stop your emotions.
Give yourself a couple of weeks to grieve then snap out of it and think of all the positives.
Give yourself a couple of weeks to grieve then snap out of it and think of all the positives.