Is it okay for my boyfriend to go out every weekend and come home whenever?
Answered 5 years ago
My boyfriend has gone out the past 7 weekends and comes home around 3am smelling like alcohol. He says it’s okay because he is going clubbing with his sister and friends and i should accept it because his sister is there. I feel like 1:30 isn’t too late to ask and maybe not every weekend. I also feel like clubs are a no go if you are in a committed relationship of years. While he is out he doesn’t tell me who is there i always have to see the pictures of other girls or them getting drunk later. This last time I told him he would hurt me if he went to the club for the 7th weekend in a row and it would hurt our relationship and he went anyway using excuses like he needed to drive his friend home. Well 3:30 am came around and his friend was dropping him off.
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I went out to a club with my husband for my 21st birthday (by that stage we had twins in the NICU), it felt so icky. We were both too mature for it. The dancing and drinking in a seedy dark place with people crowding us was just yuck.
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1. Yes I went to the club. My SIL had planned a surprise party for me. So we get to the club and surprise, my friends and family were there. We stayed till 9:30 and left.
2. My twins were not fighting for their lives at that point in time. They were only learning how to properly suckle and then coming home. When they WERE fighting for their lives we were by their sides for every moment we could be there.
3. Whether I win mother of the year or not is none of your business.
4. Do you ever leave your children? Are they in the care of some of the best medical professionals in the country when you do? So I don't spend every second of every single day of their lives breathing in their exhalations, sue me. When you win worlds greatest mother, I'll take your suggestions (if you have any) and also the time machine you seem to have. Then we can set to right any disappointments you have in my life.
I don't see clubs as exclusively for single people either. Just for people wishing to get drunk and dance and socialise. Has he cheated before and that is why you don't trust him at the nightclub?
7 weekends in a row adds up to quite a lot of money wasted on alcohol, quite a lot of time wasted recovering the next day and not being helpful to your family. I would suggest a compromise, maybe only once a month instead of every week. Or maybe a month he can go out every weekend, but then he stays home for 1/2 months.