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Do people ever give you compliments? After kids it seems that I don’t exist!

I feel like since I had my children I don’t exist. No one says anything flattering to me anymore. I put plenty of effort in to my appearance, I am a size 8, always wear natural but pretty make up, do my hair, dress nicely but no one seems to notice that I exist...Why??


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Answers (16)

People can be jealous, especially other women. How many mum's are a size 8 with time to do their hair and make up each day. Don't expect compliments, people just aren't that nice.

 I wish I had time to do my hair and make up every day :(
helpful (2) 
 I've never understood how mum's says they don't have time to wash their hair, shower, eat a hot meal etc. Maybe my children are the easiest little people ever but I've always had time to do all that!n
helpful (1) 

Maybe you're too focused on your own appearance that you fail to notice anyone else?

 I suspect deep down lots of people are focused on their appearances, this lady was just brave enough to admit it and post about it!
helpful (1) 

I can’t remember the last time somebody complimented me.

I’ve recently gone back to work in retail. I’ve noticed people aren’t as positive or happy as they used to be so I’ve started looking for at least one person per shift that I can compliment about something to maybe help at least one person feel good. The other day A lady came in with gorgeous red hair, I told her how much I liked it and that it really suited her. Today a lady came in and she was wearing a really nice dress, so I told her it was really nice. They’ve both walked away with a smile on their face so I think they appreciated it.

 You sound like a beautiful person. The world needs more people like you. Keep up the good work x
helpful (2) 
 I Complimented a lady once. Said her dress was really nice. She gave me the filthiest look and turned her back on me. She was quite unattractive and I think she thought I was making fun of her but I really wasn’t.
helpful (0) 

I put in effort for myself. I feel happier when I do and i just do it for myself. Why worry about what other peoples thoughts are on you?

I don't compliment people on their appearence or superficial things very often because I can honestly say I'm not walking around judging people in order to do so.

You are going to get lots of trolls commenting here - you sound lovely and people are jealous - that's the truth.

People are so self absorbed, they don't often give each other compliments. Just because people aren't being blatant with comments, doesn't mean they don't notice you :)

You probably don't notice people noticing you! I bet they do.

They probably don’t say anything because you always look so nice. If you used to be overweight then lost weight, or you used to be ugly but now pretty, if you changed your hair colour etc, people might pay you a compliment because you look different.

 The lady above is on to something.
helpful (0) 

Why is it so important for others to notice and compliment you? (Genuine question)

 I guess it’s just that everyone likes compliments from time to time? As a few others have said, it can give a little boost on an otherwise dreary day. If I see something I like I always comment, yesterday this woman had a red lippie on and it looked great so I told her so. Lets spread the kindness around 😊
helpful (1) 
 Fair enough. I guess I just see a compliment as a bonus, so not getting one doesn't put a negative spin on the day or worry me.
helpful (0) 

I would be asking why you need other people’s approval so you have other things going for you besides your looks?

Yes I get compliments from my friends when we go out and I give compliments too. I also get them from men at work, which could be awkward but I just thank them for their kindness and don’t make them feel like weirdos. I’m a size 8, dress up, hair, make up, nails lashes the works

 It’s lovely that you compliment your friends 😊
helpful (0) 

I get noticed, I do everything you do but I don’t like it lol

 If you don't like getting noticed why put so much effort in to your appearance though?

helpful (2) 
 Because I don’t believe in mum buns and leggings all day everyday.
helpful (2) 

People do but it’s not that often. I’ve had women come up to me and tell me they love my hair, or the way I’ve done my make up, or how my eyes are an amazing colour, or just random compliments like “wow you’re beautiful”. Honestly these make me feel really awkward but do give me a boost. I don’t get the same from men, usually only a few second looks but it’s mostly when I’m not wearing makeup, with my hair just in a bun and wearing the most comfortable clothes I have. For me, women are more happy to compliment the effort put in rather than how naturally beautiful you are.

Do you want people to walk past and say things like, mmmm hello?
Pls, you don’t. It’s not flattering