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First Time Aunty and Uncle

Answered 4 years ago

First time poster please be nice What is the expectation when you become a Aunty and Uncle in terms of presents. I know there are different expectations across different culture ie is it expected you buy one of the big baby items ie Cot or is nappies, wipes and a keepsake toy acceptable being first time Aunty and uncle what would be a good amount to aim to in terms of spending on a present


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ANSWER
4 years ago
I can’t believe some of these answers. Are you trying to tell me that if your brother or sister had a baby (a big event in someone’s life ) that you wouldn’t buy them a present? I’m not talking about splashing out hundreds of dollars. But surely you could go to target and buy even an outfit or 2 with some chocolates for your own family, just like you might of it was their birthday. It’s not an expectation it’s doing something nice for your own flesh and blood

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4 years ago
Yes, but you do it because you want to, not because you have to.

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4 years ago
You sort of have to as well. It’s a major occasion you should be buying the brother or sister something to acknowledge it.

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4 years ago
My brothers didn't buy my bubs anything, doesn't bother me in the slightest. We don't really buy each other presents for anything, so I was glad they didn't feel like they had to just because I had a baby.

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4 years ago
My brothers don’t buy me presents either but they did when bubz was born. It’s a big moment

ANSWER
4 years ago
I wasn't aware there was an expectation 😂

ANSWER
4 years ago
OP are you greek or Italian by any chance? I gather Italian families take this stuff seriously if my friends are any indication.

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4 years ago
Yes you hit the nail on the head, it is really frowned upon that is the reason I ask this question. Not to cause arguments or people thinking they can be rude or that I am stupid but what one person or family think is acceptable others don’t. I honestly was just wanting some guidance

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4 years ago
Op I’m from Europe too. Do you know what has been done in the family before or is the very first baby? Generally in our family the close family like brothers sisters parents will buy one of the bigger items like cot pram etc or when I had children my sisters and brothers just gave me cash $500 to go and buy that stuff. It really depends on the norm in your circle of family. You could offer to buy the rocker or something they are generally around $100 and maybe some outfits or like others suggested a nice hamper you can make up with nappies clothes etc. I would say aim to maybe spend about $200. My first cousins all gave me around that much. It may seem like much to some but it’s just the norm in our culture.

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4 years ago
My mum bought the cot when I had my bub but instead of buying the baby a present or flowers or balloons when I was in hospital she actually bought me a hamper. She had bought a robe and perfume and chocolates in their for me. A lot more practical than balloons or flowers. Something for mum, baby won’t know if it got a present or not

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4 years ago
If it’s the norm in your culture, why didn’t you say that in the first instance?

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4 years ago
Thanks this is the very first baby. I just feel out of my depth as whenever I have given what I would feel as appropriate the way they act is though it isn’t good enough. I guess I am just sick and tired of being treated like a second class citizen

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4 years ago
Some relatives are just like that you can do no good or they always expect more. Do you have a budget in mind? Is this your sister or brother? Can you flat out just ask them what you could buy or they need For bubz within reason? Then you’d know they would def like it

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4 years ago
Also I forgot to say just because it is expected of you stay within your budget please don’t feel like you have to spend more than you can afford. No family member should ever expect that

ANSWER
4 years ago
I'm so surprised people have such big expectations. I've never expected anything from my brother or sister for my children. Just that they love them, which they do so it's all I can ask for ♥️

ANSWER
4 years ago
We give and receive gifts and help each other out but its not an expectation for anything in my family. My sister would get first dibs on any baby stuff I wanted to pass on but she would never demand it. (my kids are older than hers)

ANSWER
4 years ago
I didn’t expect a thing from aunties or uncles for any of my kids. Some of mine and my husbands siblings gave a small gift (Outfit/ toy/ photo frame/ book) and some gave nothing.
I didn’t expect or even want anyone to buy any big ticket items for my babies, that is for the parents to purchase.

ANSWER
4 years ago
The expectation is that you care & support them. Not what you spend. If you're unsure what to buy, ask what they need. An idea is a small hamper filled with smaller items. An outfit, nappies, consumables, toys and some luxuries for mum & dad like chocolates, coffee or lovely body products. If you're looking for something extra pop in a gift card for a meal delivery service. Doesn't have to be expensive.

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4 years ago
Thanks I know that but also know it is expected that grandparents as well as Aunty and Uncles purchase the big baby items so I want to know how much is reasonable to spend once I know I will do so accordingly

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4 years ago
^No, it is not expected that grandparents and aunties/uncles will buy big items. If anything, nowadays people are more expected to pay for things themselves, e.g. weddings, babies, uni, house deposits etc.

ANSWER
4 years ago
There should be no expectation. Whatever are happy to spend is acceptable.

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4 years ago
This ^

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4 years ago
I am aware there shouldn’t be a expectation but there clearly is these days, because of that I want to ensure I do right by that child

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4 years ago
^ ummm, what? if you want to do right by the child , give them Love and attention. They won’t care about or even remember the $800 cot/pram//playpen you bought them.

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4 years ago
If you get sucked in to these unrealistic expectations then I'm sorry, you probably deserve to lose your money :(

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4 years ago
I will love my niece or nephew 110% but at the same time I know there is certain expectations it has already been made clear we arnt good enough but at the same time it won’t stop me from doing what is expected of me as I mere way of trying to fit in

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4 years ago
^ you are insisting you need to spend a lot of money. If that is expected of you, why disk you ask what your expectation is? What exactly are you asking then?

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4 years ago
I am asking how much is expected to spend on such ocessions or how much would you spend I am trying to get a better idea

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4 years ago
^ ok, and you’re getting your answers. You don’t need to spend a lot

ANSWER
4 years ago
Think practicality. That's it :)

ANSWER
4 years ago
I didn't expect anything material from uncles and aunties. I just hoped that they'd love and care for my children.

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4 years ago
You definitely are one of a kind it is unfortunate that more people don’t have that same thinking, I want to do the right thing by the baby so want to ensure I am gifting appropriately

ANSWER
4 years ago
My siblings and I do the big items for each other. Eg: Cot, pram, car seat etc
I would say $500-$800 is a good amount depending on your budget/relationship with parents to be. You could put your hand up from now and say highchair and playpen on us or baby monitor (there’s some real fancy ones these days) congratulations Aunty!

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4 years ago
Thanks for that I did realise the expectation $$ wise was so high, for me I never wanted anything and we bought everything ourselves

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4 years ago
OP this is NOT the expectation. That's an extremely high amount for most people. Spend only what you can afford and are comfortable with. No one wants you to take out a second mortgage just to buy a gift. Most people usually have these things before the baby arrives anyway. I have a lot of nieces and nephews and we always buy simple yet practical things. I make up a little hamper containing Nappies, wipes etc. Gift cards are a great idea. Another alternative is to buy the mumma a gift. She'll appreciate a thoughtful gift like a spa day or something (hypothetical) Don't overthink it. Just adore that beautiful little bub and be the best aunt a kid could ask for x

ANSWER
4 years ago
First bub, I usually buy a box of newborn nappies - you never realise how many you will use, and I add a cute little outfit, teddy, book or hat. Just go with what you can afford. Remember, most outfits are useless on newborns. Find a lovely soft blanket?

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4 years ago
Thanks I intend on purchasing a outfit to be used when the baby is older

ANSWER
4 years ago

I just want my siblings to be part of my kids lives, I love it when my brothers take the time out of their crazy busy lives to face time them for half an hour or come back to our hometown and take them fishing. It’s more important to me that my sister makes the effort to get our kids together.

Ask them or surely you can see if they are struggling to buy big ticket items. Really the expectation these days is that the parents buy the necessities themselves.
When expecting parents expect more they usually don’t hide the fact. My cousins had baby showers with expensive high teas and gift registries which their sisters and cousins and aunts from the other side purchased from, this is their normal.
Maybe treat them to a photography session and buy them a bunch of Menulog vouchers

ANSWER
4 years ago
I didn't expect or receive anything from my siblings maybe just buy an outfit and a keepsake toy if you want to. I gave my sister heaps of clothes but unisex. Maybe go for a hamper of baby goods . If u want.

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4 years ago
Can I ask do you or would you you expect the grandparents to buy a big Baby item or do you think a nice present is acceptable

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4 years ago
No one should expect anyone to pay for items for their children, doesn't matter if they are related or not. If they want to, great, but it should not be expected.