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I once lost my shit and kicked a kid out of My house, the kid about 11, friends with my son at the time, who sassed me and then said I was fat. He laughed at me, like I was joking, and I just ended up yelling get the f**k out of my house!
Seriously these kids these days, try to walk all over you. No wonder teachers have so much trouble
Be firm, , look at her in the face and explain it to her. Be direct about how you only have fruit and she needs to not ask for other foods. I know the parents are good and you hope that these kids will grow up..this is just the way they are at this age..so you explain it’s not cool rather than being polite. There is nothing wrong with being firm..your house your rules and you only have so much energy! Protect it
Your house. Your rules.
There is a reason why it is you looking after this child and not some other parent. The mother has tried everyone else and they have made excuses time for you to do the same. The situation won’t get better they are using you and the girl will have no intention of being your daughters friend. End it quickly.
If you have to, tell her she won't be welcome to come over any more if she can't respect the rules of your house. Also worth mentioning something to her mum, eg. Can you please remind XX that she's not allowed on our computer when she comes over etc.
Explain the house rules to her. Let her know the consequences (no tv, sitting in secluded room like a time out, whatever you do). Then treat her accordingly. Give a few extra warnings in the beginning, as no one has set these type of limits before. If mom objects, she can always make other arrangements.
At least pretend the computer is broken. Maybe suggest to the other mum that her kid bring some food as you don't keep the foods he likes in the house.