Husband week spent in sporting rather than family
Answered 12 months ago
Husband and father of a 2 and 4year old is always out. Particularly after having the second one. He firstly decided to sign up to a sports team on our weekly family fun night (Friday) without asking how I felt, I eventually got over that and was fine until he started lying About Thursday’s and I found that he joined another sports team. We then agreed that he would alternate the sports days so that we would have every other Friday. This lasted two weeks. He has now said that he has joined yet ANOTHER sports team on the Wednesday! In addition to these three sporting day, he does 2hour walks/runs on the other 4 days. I have had the same discussion with him several times about feeling that 3x week is madness. One time I joined a dance class that was 3x per week just to leave him with the kids and I had the entire family call and complain about how I was spending too much time away! I just feel he doesn’t invest any time in his wife or kids . He designates Saturday as family day And as Saturday evening approaches it’ll be “going out with the boys”. Eventually I lost it and he said “this is just the way I am” I am a working mum so family time is so critical for me. Been given half a Saturday to me isn’t good enough! How can he feel this is justified? He literally is gone all the time and when he is home, he has things to do outside of the home. I recently booked 2hours with the girls and told him about it a week ago. Today he told me he organized a Full day boating session with his friends on the same day and I therefore cannot go. I am so fed up of chasing and fighting for time! I jus give up!
Have an answer?
They hate it.
We separated a few years later due to his sports taking over
The thing is, as long as it's allowed, he'll do it. My friend had to eventually tell him, and mean it - 'youre in or out' and they had counselling. Tbh he's much better, but is always out whenever he can invent as reason.
If he's out, you'll have to arrange concrete visitation because he'll try to get out of that too.
Whatever the outcome, stand your ground. You matter too.