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Torn

My husband and I are on a break, things have gone completely downhill and only getting worse. Ive asked for things to change and he says he will try but doesnt. Ive needed love and support from him with medical issues and he hasnt given me what any normal person would. He talks about all our issues with other people including family and friends but wont talk to me.
What makes me such a bad person that he cant at least show he is willing to help us

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Answers (2)

Leave. I'm 8yrs on from my mental breakdown caused by post-partum psychosis. I have never received support from husband. He would ring me when I was hospitalized and say that I had abandoned him and our baby. I'm now much, much better by my own perseverance and finally have the strength to leave and will be doing very soon. I still receive no support from him and everything is blamed on my 'mental illness'. Even if he forgets to pay a bill, it's somehow blamed on me. So between no support and years of "gas-lighting", I'm out. I truly wish I had have done it years ago.

Put it this way. In 10yrs time, will you look at him across the table at dinner with a look of adoration and an honest smile of love? Or has he damaged it so far that even in 10yrs you will look at him like "bloody hell, I deserve better."

If this is not a phase he is going through you should seriously think about your own future happiness. My husband has been retrenched four times, it is him he can’t just get along with people. I know he tries hard but I basically work because he is so unreliable. It’s a terrible cycle and I have only stuck with him because he is a good father and doesn’t hit me. He once raised his voice at me and I said don’t raise your voice to me I don’t deserve that. We are going through this again, I know it’s going to be hell.