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How to get the romance back?

How do I get romance back into my marriage. I'm not talking about sex, we do plenty of that but it's so mechanical. After 15yrs together I struggle to get affection like a sweet cuddle from behind and a peck on the cheek while I'm cooking tea or a quick dance around the kitchen. I'd even settle for an arse grope.
99% of the time IF my husband tries to be affectionate he's drunk and REALLY annoying. He tries to cuddle me but leans on me heavily, bending my back painfully or tries to kiss me like Cath and Kel Knight kiss each other. (To be fair he had never been the best kisser.)
I just want it back. I watch romantic movies by myself and become depressed coz I miss that playful love.


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Answers (7)

Read “The Love Dare”. It is focused on making sure you uphold your end - without judging what he’s doing. At the end of it, I guarantee that romance will be alive and well, and his head will be spinning at what an amazing catch he has and wanting to make up lost years with you 💓

 This book was great for our relationship. Best ever and stronger every day.
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 Thank you I will get the book.
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 So gay
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I hear you. No idea how but I hope there are some useful answers on here for us both 😟

 It's a bit of comfort knowing that it's not just me that needs the romance back. Thank you xoxo best of luck to you as well
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 Thanks x
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 It’s definitely not just you. I have been with my husband 16 years we recently bought a business together and that’s zapped any remaining romance. I’ve almost accepted that part of our life is over. It doesn’t help that we don’t have a sex life either (that’s on him).
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My husbands idea of romance is sex. It puts me off. Then when I tell him I’m not in the mood he thinks I don’t love him and has a sook.

 We must be married to the same man.
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Maybe you should try being more affectionate? Hold his hand, give him a random kiss or hug etc. it might encourage him to reciprocate? Also, let him know how you’re feeling?

So many of us in these marriages that arent satisfying - for us and/or our partners!!
My heart broke a little bit more tonight - this growing sense of resentment from him. Sometimes it only takes a few words for the real underlying feelings to show. We don’t connect anymore, hugs feel forced, no flirting & if I do I’ll often be rejected.
From what I’m hearing, he thinks I take sides with the kids against him, that I don’t respect him, & from tonight’s exchange - apparently I think I’m better than him.
If he really knew me, he’d know that’s so far from the truth.
I just googled parallel marriage - yep that’s us for sure. Emotional emptiness. Just living the dream that’s really a farce.

Have you tried doing those things yourself?

 I have tried 'flirting etc' many times with my husband. He either laughs at me or ignores me.
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I'm miss that playful part of romance in my life too ....only problem is my husband was never like that.