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Online pornography my son is 10

Hi. I’m curious to know with mother’s of boys, at what age do they start to masturbate? So recently I’ve noticed when I’ve checked my son’s browser history he’s starting to look at porn. The porn itself is quite generic and I’m not worried about the content although explicit it’s certainly what you’d expect a young boy to want to see. But am I meant to say no to watching porn at all? Or will that embarrass him like where do I go from here?

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Answers (15)

I don't think it is appropriate in any way for a 10 year old child to watch pornography.
He knows what sex is obviously so no need to watch it.
I strongly suggest you adjust your internet filters and start supervising his internet usage.

 Hey op here. I know it’s not appropriate for his age to see these images but I was curious at what age they start to masturbate and become interested in sex. I do monitor his internet usage quite closely, this is the first time porn has shown up in his browser history and it’s left me at a loss and feeling a bit anxious.
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Can I just say OP , that you’ve handled these comments really well. You’ve shown respect even when people are being awful. You sound like a good mum and it’s great you’re asking for advice. I have a 14 year old son. I’ve never caught him looking at porn but he probably has. I’ve never caught him playing with himself, but who knows! He’s a great kid and has no issues coming to me to discuss things like sex. You’re son might be a bit embarrassed at the moment but keep the communication lines open and he may start talking to you about it. I personally would ask him not to look at porn sites and tell him they’re not realistic but if he’d like some sex Ed books then you could get him those. I think you need to look at age appropriate teachings of course. Good luck.

 Second this!
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Have a chat while shooting some hoops - activity & not looking at each other directly.

Tell him you needed to use that device yesterday, and noticed some things pop up, e.g. Ads. Ask him if he knows what porn is. Explain it's not real, they are actors & not really having 'fun', sex is much more than that - e.g. creating a family, enjoyment that a couple share together, it's about feelings & respecting each other. Tell him masturbation is fine, healthy, normal when puberty hits, your body is figuring out how it works. Maybe share some stories that could be helpful, building friendships/ relationships, how do you see girlfriends, wives, mum's, (as in who do you see yourself getting married/partnered to, what if you have kids / daughters, online safety. Discuss at his level, you know him best. It's a tricky conversation. I found talking about puberty, sex, online security easier the earlier you started (level appropriate), when it's not embarrassing, just the normal next step in their growth. Goodluck

We have filters that stop them looking it up. Once they are old enough to pay for their own data they can look up what they like.

 How old are they when they can afford to pay?
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 OP here - thankyou for your kind and sensible comment.
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 When they get a job and pay for their device and data. Or when the youngest is 18 and I take the restrictions off.
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 What filter do you use?
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Are you sure it's the 10 year old watching it? Is there anyone else in the house that may be watching it? We have a family device and i found porn in the history and automatically thought it was hubby. I quickly showed him how to delete browser history when he told me it wasn't him, it was our 15yr old son. That was an awkward convo! Hey son, let me show you how to delete your history so that your sisters dont have to see this...ok... yeah, great.

 OP here. Yeah unfortunately it is definately his. I’m a single mum and have two other daughters so it’s his. I am curious though as to how I should word my conversation to him about this awkward topic without embarrassing the shit out of him.
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 I'm sorry you have to deal with this alone. I agree with the another poster about bringing up the topic while doing an activity to try and eliminate some of the awkwardness. It's not going to be an easy topic but I guess if you get it over with early and be reasonable and understanding then he will feel comfortable coming to you later on with these inquiries. My guess is that maybe some of the kids at school were yarning about it and he just got curious. Boys will be boys after all. I know 10 is too young to be watching and engaging with porn sites but kids will be curious. He probably got a rude shock when he actually saw it! Ha. Best of luck to you friend. Keep us updated, it will be good to know how you handled it and how he reacted as I have a 9 yr old too and when we discussed it with the 15 year old he was mortified. You will no doubt have some great advice to share afterwards.
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10 is way too young to be watching porn. I stressed when my 14 year old starting watching it but no way would I allow my 10 year old too. Your child needs to be supervised better and child-filtering software to be put on all devices in the home.

 OP here. Did you have a conversation with your son when you realised he was watching it? I’m just unsure as to what I should say to my son.
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 Sorry mate I didn't. Hubby had that chat with him. Also apologies for coming across like a bitch
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Supervise your kids

 OP here. As I’ve said I do supervise my kids. I’ve found this porn in his browser history for the first time only last night! I’m seeking advice on what to do about it.
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Be careful with porn. For kids it has been coined traumatic for a child to watch, and like all traumas a child then feels they have to keep watching it to understand and process what they are seeing. Especially when men are demeaning women and women are liking this.

Tell him his dick will fall off by 13 if he keeps wanking

Hi guys sorry I’ve looked at my question this morning which had been written very late last night. Firstly, I monitor his internet usage quite closely. And this is the first time I’ve seen pornography in his browser history. I’m not giving him permission to watch porn, nor am I ignoring the issue. I just wanted to know how I should word the conversation about porn with him. I have had the sex talk with him last year but this is just all new to me. And I will be adjusting the internet filters on all my devices.

 I would tell him he is too young to look at porn, and make sure he knows you aren't upset and it's ok to be curious and he can ask any questions. Then maybe give him a magazine that's not too graphic, girls in underwear and tops off sort of thing.
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 ^ omg you’re another one! How are you people raising kids
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 Raising them to understand masturbation is normal and not a big deal, but putting boundaries in place.
Kids are curious and learning about their body's no need to clutch your pearls and faint.

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 OP here, “another one what!” I’ve found this advice really useful and it seems like common sense. I’m glad I’ve reworded the question and also have had a few helpful replies. I’ve found some online articles on parenting websites which have guidelines and facts sheets I can read to feel more prepared and empowered.
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Of course you should say no to your 10 year old watching porn. On the off chance you aren't a troll. SUPERVISE YOUR FU****G KIDS.

 Wow. So much aggression.
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 There should be aggression shown. A ten year old kid should not be watching porn. There are healthier ways to learn about sex like encouraging your child to ask you questions or getting them age appropriate books to learn from.
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 OP here. No I’m not a troll. It was late last night when I was checking his browser history. I have just worded my question poorly. As stated in other comments I do monitor his internet usage. I’m just wondering at what age do boys become this curious and start masturbating etc and also how to breach this sensitive topic with him.
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Reminds me of a guy i went to school with. His mother found his dirty book stash under his bed soo she got out a vivid and put clothes on them all lol. Maybe have a look at some family friendly browsers to download or one of those netnanny apps.

Just block it, it’s not appropriate at all. But don’t be nasty when you speak to him. Just nicely explain. He’ll be over the conversation before you know it