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How can I be content?

I have a very good life. I am aware of it everyday and I dont think i take it for granted. But Im always worried about what I might be missing out on, striving for more (not material posessions but relationships and experiences) or worried that I havent done enough or that I stuffed up or upset someone or not been a good enough friend/wife/mum/host etc. I stress about everything. I feel responsible for everything and everyone. Im always making an effort to keep up relationships. I worry people wont like me - which i know is stupid because i have many friends - many for 20+ years. I always include everyone (the more the merrier!) Because i hate to leave people out and it upsets me if/when its not recpricated - or I think its not. I read so much into things and get stressed/anxious/pissed off about things that havent happened, i just think they will. Why am I like this?? Its so exhausting and draining. Why cant i just be content and stop worrying about everyone else


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Answers (5)

I'm terrible at keeping relationships. If I don't see the person everyday or often we lose contact. I am so weird. I still consider them friends but just hopeless at staying in contact. You sound really inclusive which is probably why you have so many friends, I love to feel included in someones life.

 Not the Op ...but I am terrible at keeping up relationships too, now I have no friends. We move alot for my husbands work and I don't take the time to keep in touch so I lose contact with people.
You should try a little harder or you will end up like me. I'm older now and a bit of a loner.

helpful (0) 

Hmm I can relate to how you describe yourself. But I've found that as I get older I care less about what people think of me (and the relationships I have with others become less stressful as a result). And the expectations I put on myself change. Sure there's a heap of stuff I'd love to do with my life, but right now I'm exactly where I need to be for now. I'm still applying for the dream jobs, and aiming for the stars, but I know that what is meant to be will be. One day at a time dear.
You come to realise that not everyone has the same heart as you. So whilst you might willingly jump through hoops to make sure others don't feel left out, they might not have had the same experiences in life that you have so may not think that inclusion is a priority.
I don't know if there's a quick solution to how you're feeling. But I know for me it was a matter of time. I'll be 28 soon, I have 4 kids a husband and 2 pets that need my attention and affection, I don't have time to give a damn what others think of me. If something fu**s up in my presence, we'll sort that out when we get to it. There's no point borrowing stress from what might be.

It honestly sounds like you have an anxiety disorder, have you seen a doctor?

 I agree, I think that it would be worth a Dr's visit.
helpful (2) 

I feel very much like you sometimes. I think you just have to take a deep breath and say 'Im doing the best I can! ' If you make a mistake, learn from it, but dont dwell on it. We ALL make mistakes. Thats life, If you knew everything when you were born it would be boring! Balance in all things is really important too. Balance in family, marriage, work, friends, relatives, exercise, hobbies, housework, religion, volunteer work, pets, whatever is in your life, try to balance it.