Ask SAHM is a place where you can ask our staff & community a question safely & anonymously. Please read our disclaimer.

I cheated on my fiancé with one of his best friends and I don’t know what to do..

My fiancé and I have been together since I was 17. He started hanging out with this guy about two years ago and we all became very good friends. He came over one night and my fiancé got super drunk and passed out. So our friend and me just sat in the kitchen drinking more alcohol together. He kept flirting with me and putting my legs on his. After a few more shots we kissed, and kept kissing though out the night. I love my fiancé very much so I don’t know why I did it. Should I tell him or kept it to ourselves and never do anything like that agin?

Report

Got an Answer?


Answers (8)

I can't believe the amount of people that cheat and claim that they love their partner? It's disgusting.

 Lots of people cheat. Set up a profile on AM and you will be shocked at your flooded inbox.
helpful (0) 

If it was only kissing & you are truly shocked at what you did - cheat, shut the fu*k up & be the best damn girlfriend fiance wife that you can be. NEVER say a thing, it will wreck your relationship forever. NEVER be alone with his friend again & swear him to secrecy.

 ^^ I agree with this. He'll never look at you again the same as he does now. That special spark between you will be gone, he'll never fully trust you again. Go & get some counselling for yourself to deal with your issues.
helpful (2) 
 She's already wrecked the relationship by cheating. With his mate might I add. Filth.
helpful (5) 

Imho I think you should give your boyfriend the respect he deserves and come clean

 Do this if you wish it to be over forever: whether he stays or not he’ll never treat you the same. Trust me being on the receiving end
helpful (1) 
 He shouldn't treat her the same. She cheated!!!!
helpful (1) 

Tell him so he has the chance to decide if he wants to be with you before you get married. It's only fair he knows what he's getting into.

I would rethink marriage, if you are already attracted to other men than you might not be in love as much as you think. And you know what that is ok. There are plenty of people in this world, you sound too young to commit. If you were my daughter I would advise you to ditch them both and work on yourself, there is nothing wrong with admitting you are not ready and giving yourself some time. Being with someone since 17 already sounds like a recipe for disaster. Go and explore, find out what matters to you and what sort of life you want, marriage take a lot of time and effort best to make sure you are with the right person.

I think you should come clean. One reason is otherwise your friend has power over you, can threaten to tell your fiance what happened, and possibly make you out to be the bad guy.

 She is the bad guy!!!
helpful (4) 
 The best friend is also not a person of good character, especially if he's flirting & trying to get it on with his mates fiance. He's not someone to keep around, find a way to ditch him. Maybe the best friend had altererior motives all along, maybe he helped his mate get very drunk
helpful (3) 
 Oh I didn't mean she hasn't done anything bad (because she totally has), I just meant the friend might say it was all her idea and she came onto him etc. And the fiance might believe it if he's the first one to tell him about what happened.
helpful (0) 

It was only kissing

 Omg kissing is still cheating 🙄
helpful (0) 
 Yep, kissing is absolutely still cheating, but not as bad as an emotional &/or sexual affair.
helpful (1)