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Has anyone made a huge decision or life choice thinking it would be long term/permanent then changed your mind or realised it was a mistake after only a short time?

Have you bought a property, then wanted/needed to sell again not long after. Or moved overseas/interstate only for it to not work out. Quit a job for a new 'better' job and then resign as its not what you thought? These are just examples. How do you handle the financial loss aspect? And the telling family and friends that you made a mistake etc?


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Answers (11)

Was discussing this with a friend last night. They moved from a small country town to a city. They hate it and want to go back but are worried as what people may say eg you’re a failure, you came crawling back. I said to tell them you had the courage to give something a go but you simply didn’t like it and preferred it back home. It’s better to give something a go and find it didn’t work out than have regrets later in life for not trying something new or different. They’ll lose a bit of money through the move, but they’ll get back on their feet soon enough.

 Remind your friend as well, not to worry what others think! Good on them for giving it a go, that takes courage!
helpful (4) 
 You’d be surprised how many people come back! I lived in a town of 14,000 people and half those who moved to the state capital came back. Nothing to be embarrassed about. You either love it or hate it in the city, and you won’t know unless you’ve lived in it as just going for a holiday is a diff experience
helpful (3) 
 I would tell them to give it a proper go and if they still hate it to move back. At least they tried it.
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Yes and no. We sold our beautiful house and quit our jobs to start our own business. Invested over 500k so we could start our dream business. Well we successfully started our business and have been able to stay home with the kids (our goal) but we hate it and we are tied to this business and location which we also hate. At the end of the day we are home with our kids which was our main priority and we are working towards our new goal. Do I wish I could go back in time and just do what we wanted to now from the start? Yes. But life's a bitch and I have learnt alot and grown a lot in that time and who knows maybe I will hate our new venture too.

We've made some silly financial decisions, but at the end of the day we just say "well now we know". We've grown and learned. I like the saying "in order to be old and wise, you must first be young and stupid". Hahaha that's fine by me, if one day I look back and go "well f**k, that was a dumb move", at least I can say "better learn from it".

1. We bought a house in the country, hell bent that a tree change would make things so much better. 18 months later we are selling up and heading back to where we came from. Not necessarily losing money as such but where we moved from just happened to boom almost as soon as we left, so if we'd stayed we would've had an extra $100k+ in equity now, and now we'll have to rent for a while while we save a bigger deposit for the inflated housing prices (and are going to get less for our money).
2. I moved in with a guy two hours away and restarted my life only to move out a few months later.
3. Tafe courses x 3
4. Uni degree x 1
5. About to start uni again and it's probably going to end with me getting a year in and realising it doesn't interest me as much as I thought 😂

Answered by OP

You guys are so brave. Im so scared of failure and stuffing up that it stops from taking the leap sometimes. Im always so worried about losing what ive got and ending up worse off. I need security and even the smallest things can make me feel like im slipping.

 Start by taking small risks
helpful (0) 
 same here OP!
helpful (0) 

Sometimes it's not other people's business, and they don't need to know your reasons for anything! If people judge, that's their issue not yours.

There's no point in putting up with something that makes you unhappy. I'm not sure about financial losses though, like taking a lower paying job that you like more is a bit different to a $70,000 loss on a property

We have just recently gone through something similiar. it is part of life, you take a risk, it doesn't always work out. In our case, my hubby was hell bent on moving interstate, got a job and went over on his own at first with the intention of the rest of the family moving over. I got rid of a whole heap of stuff only to find that his job was a bit unstable so I hung back a bit. In the end after 6 months, it was decided it wasn't going to work and that it was pointlesss spending anymore money on it so he moved back.

In terms of telling people, it is as simple as just saying "it didnt work out." People understand that. In terms of financial loss, the only thing you can really do is to recongise that things aren't working out and act before you lose anymore then try and recupe what you have lost and move on. Have a look at your budget, or go seek outside help.

In our example, we could see the job wasn't going to work out, so we hung back before we committed to spending thousands getting the household over. I am glad we did.

Yep we moved states, blew through all our savings about ten grand and moved back after six months, worst mistake we ever made but our family supported us and helped us out by giving us a place to live til we got back on our feet

I had a baby 6 weeks ago and wish I could turn back time

 Please reach out to your doctor, maternal and child health nurse or friends if you are feeling overwhelmed. Having a new baby is hard.
helpful (4) 
 Get some help please! MCHN is the best… I once went to them at 8am in tears because I was so overwhelmed with my baby. I arrived as one of the nurses was literally just arriving, but she took me inside and made me feel like she had all the time in the world for me. And she got me the help I needed. They’ve seen it a hundred times before and they’ll see it a hundred more
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Um, f**k yeah, heaps. not doing the right degree at uni, moving overseas, moving in with wrong guy, changing jobs to the wrong job. Its part of who I am. I learn from my experiences.

I have to say I'm the luckiest son of a bitch alive.

After only living in apartments we bought a house not knowing all the little things to think of when buying, everything about our house is beyond perfect.

I sunk 25k into a buisness that yielded it back in 2 months and now earns 20k a month - a lot of it risidual and I work about 15 hours a week.

My overseas travels were amazing I lived in Africa Denmark Sweden Alaska and Canada

My husband is probly the only thing I should have walked away from but were in too deep now and it is what it is.
My mum knew. I didn't listen.
It mostly works but it's just the one part of my life that I didn't really get it dead on. That being said having him father my kids was a good choice sooo

I don't know why I'm ranting

 neither do I..
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