Ask SAHM is a place where you can ask our staff & community a question safely & anonymously. Please read our disclaimer.

Age for poo in the toilet.

My 3 1/2 year old won't poo on the toilet. He prefers to hold on until his night time nappy and poos in it. He has started pooing in his underwear. Particularly at day care. He goes into the bathroom and squats near the toilet and poos. He says poos go in the toilet but can't grasp this. He is pretty good for wee but has occasional accidents.
Anyone experienced similar?
If so please share your advice.


Got an Answer?

Answers (10)

My son was day trained at 3. Not poo/night trained until 5. This apparently isn't uncommon. He would wait until his nappy was on at night to do a poo. It took encouragement, bribes, rewards charts but it really did come down to when he was ready.

My daughter is 3 years and 9 months and still in nappies full time. We have been trying since she turned 2 to get her into undies. I'm stressed she won't be in undies by the time she begins prep next year, but we just have to keep on trying. She will get there eventually.

My son did the exact same at that age. He's 4 yrs and 2 months now and we've only just started to get poos on the toilet in the last 2 weeks. It took us buying one of those toilet seats with the step and really talking it up, taking him to the shop to choose and buy it himself and telling him how big boys use the "special seat" to poo but if he doesn't use it we have to take it back to the shop. And since the day we got it, no more poos in nappies! I thought we'd never get there but once it clicked its done!

At the kindergarten my first went too, most of the kids(I think all) didn't pop there until they were into there fours( they were all full time) The teachers said this was common to have the anxiety. Once he's over the bump it will be a distant mrmory, but sounds like you might need to start encouraging him at home. It would be great if he can watch others do it, including kids. perhaps give him foods that make it softer and start practicing getting rid of the nappy ( maybe say you ra out and the shop is closed?)

Will he do a poo on a potty? It might be that he doesnt like sitting on the toilet because he's worried he might fall in or something. Especially since he'd stand up to pee. It took a while for my son to use the toilet for poo.

Maybe put a little bit of toilet paper in the toilet so the water doesn't splash back on him? I know it sounds silly but this really freaked my daughter out and I've heard the same from others but once the splashing stopped they were fine.

My son was the same, would wait until his night nappy. We just had to find the right reward and it was solved pretty quickly. For him it was a favorite toy after 5 poos in the toilet...

My son is 5 and refuses to poo in the toilet! He has full control and requests a nappy when he needs to poo. We have just started putting the poo in the toilet which is so gross :-/ but he runs to the toilet now when I take the nappy off and clean him up to put the poo in the toilet. He does have autism which makes it hard! I just keep saying to my husband he's not going to do it while he doesn't want to. There's is no amount of time sitting on the toilet that is going to make him poo sitting there!! Yet we still offer it to him and make it known that poo goes in the toilet. Just keep at it is my only advice. It's a tough one :(

Maybe have him checked by a doctor to see if his muscles are working properly. I know someone who's child had muscle issues. He couldn't feel the sensation to poo. He got badly constipated and then pooed himself constantly because things weren't working right. He's done now but it took a while.