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Sexless Marriage

by SAHM Staff Report

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Answers (20)

Real love is soooo much more than sex. Some marriages rely on it too much, take it away & there's not much left.

 Sex is hormonally important to the bonding of a romantic pair. It would be very difficult for most relationships to flourish without this hormonal assistance which continues to strengthen bonds.
It's biological.

helpful (5) 

helpful (0) 
 It's all about soul
helpful (1) 

My marriage was VERY sexless (my own doing) then my health improved and honestly I cannot keep my hands off my husband! I don't share this info with my friends, because they seem to complain about sex and I love it, so I don't want to seem weird and they might think I'm bragging 🤷‍♀️ sex is so much fun, and we barely fight anymore (ours fights were very angry and loud and we wouldnt talk for days) because the sex makes me feel more close and connected. Not saying this is the case for everyone though, sex is not the only factor, but it definitely helps us. I get sad if we do argue now, because all's I'm thinking is I hope we're not fighting for too long, because I will miss the sex hahaha. Anyway, I really hope every one of you has, or finds, someone who can give you the happiness you deserve.

But yet the woman get all upset when their husband has been to an escort or massage! You chose that he didn't remember that and a marriage is two ways and compromise stop being selfish

I don’t understand what you are trying to say

helpful (3) 
 He didn't remember what? That he has the ability to keep his dick in his pants?
helpful (5) 
 You chose the sexless marriage not him and it isn't all about you! Don't get upset if he seeks comfort elsewhere. He has sexual needs and desires to and to without sex because you don't want it isn't fair
helpful (4) 
 I'm in a sexless marriage, not my choice, my husband too "tired/old/can't get up", etc etc so you're saying that makes it completely acceptable to go and f**k everyone else because I didn't choose that? Utter bullshit! Unless it's an open marriage it's still not acceptable and I'd be a shitty person if I cheated to "get mine". Honestly people, have some self discipline
helpful (5) 
 Sex can be a real need for some just because you are married doesn’t mean your libido just disappears after a decade of marriage. People change just because you chose monogamy in a sex fuelled relationship doesn’t mean you should continue monogamy in a marriage that becomes sexless.
helpful (5) 

I am in a sexless marriage and it sucks. There is no real reason for it and I have talked about it on here before. I can't really leave him over it so I just have to deal with it on my own.

I'm pretty sure my marriage is bordering on sexless, but that's cos my husband is the one too exhausted to put out. I feel like I'm entitled to sex though 😂

We are headed that way. I’ve had a few health issues and have put on 15kg in 2yrs. I’m bordering on a size 16 Aus. He’s told me before that he’s not really that attracted to me anymore because of the weight.
On the weekend I mentioned I was buying new swimwear for our family holiday - he just snapped and told me off for not exercising. He fat shamed me. Now I feel like he’s embarrassed to be seen on a beach with me.
Why would I now feel comfortable having sex with him?
He’s not initiated it for a long time ... doubt he will for a while.
So much for unconditional love

 If he has openly told you he is not attracted to you because of the weight gain, isn’t there something you can do to help lose weight? I know it’s hard but if he sees you making an effort it might go a long way. And no I don’t believe he should have to be attracted to you because you have pit on weight. He is not shallow he is human.
helpful (4) 
 Yes and no
He is human and physical attraction is primal I guess
But there’s more to a marriage than physical connection
I’m still the same person I was 15kg ago!

helpful (3) 
 He is shallow, it's a character flaw. Not your fault.
helpful (0) 
 What an asshole! You should lose the weight for you if that's what you want and then leave his sorry a*s.
helpful (1) 
 How are you now..?
What happened ..
Updates please ...

helpful (0) 

He's been cheating. We had sex maybe once a month for years and I was wrong for asking questions about it. Oh but I'm not supposed to meet anyone. I'm just supposed to wait around for his attention that he's been giving to other people. I had sex after he broke up with me with a friend, but that qualified as cheating to him. He never married me. We were back together and now I'm preparing to leave. I'm going to find one person to do everything that he wasn't.

There’s no black and white answer! Everyone is different and what is accustomed some won’t be for others. We didn’t have sex for more than a year- after a HG pregnancy and a traumatic birth my husband pretty much refused until I felt better and was healed. He respected me enough to know it wasn’t a priority. Our marriage is stronger than ever and yes we still have sex sometimes but it’s nowhere near what we used to. I’m
Fine with it. So is he. Another person may not be.

It’s no wander so many men cheat!

 Some men cheat even when they get lots of sex. Some men get lazy when married, or in long term relationships. Happy to take & not give. They generally just need to be nice guys & do normal relationship stuff, like respect, love, kindness, empathy, supporting their partner & helping with the kids & house. Try not turn into arseholes, then blame their partner for changing, when it can be them that's changed & caused a change. Of course, switch the genders.
helpful (5) 
 Its wonder
helpful (1) 
 did you read this feed? Its mostly woman wanting sex but the men they are with cant or wont!
helpful (4) 

I’ve been with my partner for 5 years and the only time we have sex is when he feels like it. And it’s usually over pretty quickly and I never get to climax
I feel like he uses it as a way to hurt me or try to get me to loose weight. I’ve had two children with him 15 months apart and once I was pregnant he wouldn’t touch me. He thought it was weird knowing there was a baby in there.
Sometimes he makes excuses like he won’t have sex if the children are in the house but occasionally he initiates it when they are which doesn’t make sense.
He’s always commenting on how my body has changed after having kids but I already had 3 other children from my first Marriage and not a lot has changed.
I actually can’t remember the last time we had sex I’ve given up trying to get affection from him because the rejection hurts too much I love sex but would just be happy to cuddle but I don’t even get that anymore I’m not going to beg
I worry because I don’t want to cheat but I’m so starved for affection I think I could if put in the situation and it so not me

It just never happens.
We are uterly exhausted, 4 kids under 7, last 2 are twins, both work full time and have different days off. He is only home one night a week, other nights Im in bed before him and dont even wake when he comes in.
After reading everyone elses problems, I wonder why we cant do it...
Great Personal Hygiene ✅
Attraction, he a adores me and I him ✅
Lust, we are forever copping a feel as we go about our day ✅
Household tasks/Chores, we are 50/50 we pick up each others slack✅
Respect, Love, the works ✅

We both want it, but it just never happens.

I had a sexless marriage for many years - about 15 years of my 24 year marriage - which I discovered after I kicked him out, that he was actually having affairs with men behind my back for the last 8 years or so of our marriage. So, I married a gay man, who used me and my 4 kids to hide his orientation, while he lied to me and the kids, stole money, and spent all his time screen addicted and going out to "work" at his home business.....

 Ouch! That's harsh
helpful (1) 
 On you I mean. Not him
helpful (1) 
Answered by SAHM Staff

Answered by SAHM Staff

lol got two articles going up - and this is where I direct people who want to talk about it!

Do you have sex cause you feel love to your partner or you want to get your rocks off ?

 Both!! I adore my husband and he can make me cum like no other man. So yes, both haha
helpful (0) 
 It can be for either reason and both can feel like seperate types of sex, for me anyways...

Some days I just fall for him and am so head over heels in love a few kisses often lead to a slow, amazing, spontaneous, need-you-right-F**K#N-now session.

Other times we tease each other all day and he has me that worked up all I can think about is the sex 😂😂

helpful (1)