Ask SAHM is a place where you can ask our staff & community a question safely & anonymously. Please read our disclaimer.

Why am I not mad???

Husband and I both work full time however I do a good 80% of the house work and it doesn't bother me at all... what's up with that?

Report

Got an Answer?


Answers (9)

Maybe its evened up in other places so you haven't felt it unfair? Yard work, kid pick ups and drop offs, bath times, meal times ? I used to complain about my ex not doing any housework and thought the work load wouldn't change when we split, but boy was I in for a surprise. He did alot more than I gave him credit for. I would never admit that though 😅

 I agree commute time can be a big time sucker. Does your hubby have a longer commute than you?
helpful (0) 

Are you fussy on how its done? I get a bit frustrated with how I'm "helped" sometimes lol.

If you're ok with it, you're ok with it. Don't let what other people think about who should be doing what make you question it.

How does your partner feel about his mere 20% contribution ?

 I don't know Iv never brought it up, when I ask him to help me or do something he jumps up and helps immediately.
helpful (0) 

I find that I am more than happy to do more than my fair share if my efforts are appreciated. I get mad when I feel than I am being taking advantage of.

Coz if you want something done properly you do it yourself

I wish I could be OK with that! I just gave up and his contribution is folding his own clothes and putting them away. I just gave up and said if no one wants to help you can eat pre made food and live in a pigsty.

How many kids do you have? I'm curious how this is possible? Do you get take away a lot?

 My mum worked full time and did 100% of the housework with 4 kids. We only got take out food once a month. She always cooked tea. Healthier and cheaper she use to say. The house was always spotless. she also had to drive us here there and everywhere for sports and music lessons
helpful (1) 
 We have one child, we have takeaway every Friday, I like to. I'll cool meals on the weekend so it's easy after work
helpful (0) 
 Yeah no doubt the mum working full time with 4 kids was for older kids, not younger kids. Or she didn't have much travel time to work. Somebody always says this but when you find out the finer details its not the same. These days you work 40 hours a week, bit more from home, 10 hours commute, all the housework, cooking etc, doesn't really leave much time for family does it? Its not really possible.
helpful (0) 

There are things I found easier doing than my ex doing them. He was really helpful with housework but he didn't do it how it has to be done for my mind to function. I found it easier to do the things that would send me crazy if not done my way and asked him to help out with keeping the kids distracted.