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Pregnant and don't want unvaccinated people visiting when baby is born

Answered 6 years ago

I don't think it's too much to ask that people make sure that they are vaccinated and up to date with their boosters before visiting a newborn. But how can you really say that to family? I don't think that 6 weeks is that long to wait to visit if they aren't going to be immunised, but I can be a pushover. My mother and in laws are with me 100%, it's just my dad and his wife and kids that I'm really concerned about. :( I just want to enjoy this happy time and have anything ruin it.


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ANSWER
9 years ago
I told everyone that if they do not get vaccinated out have the booster they were not to visit. My parents did not see their grand daughter until 6 weeks.
I also asked everyone if they were sick before they visited. I didn't care if I offended, I'd rather offend someone than watch my baby sick. Id rather people say I was OTT then watch my baby sick. Id rather tell people to fuck off and not touch my baby then watch her sick. I also made it clear on face book, by sharing articles about vaccinations and having a rant about how in would not let anyone near my baby unvaccinated. My best Freind kids are unvaccinated.... Her kids are not allowed near my new born.
But then again, I don't easily get offended, I speak my mind and I am a mumma bear. I tell it like it is. Because frankly my children's health and wellness means more to me than your feelings.
So my advice be upfront and clear about where you stand and don't be afraid to tell strangers to stay away from your pram. Just think about your bub.

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REPLY
6 years ago
Did you stay home for 6 weeks ?

ANSWER
6 years ago
You weren't overreacting

ANSWER
8 years ago
Sorry to burst your bubble- but your daughter is attending preschool or daycare is she not? She will be the one to bring home the germs and diseases regardless if she is vaccinated or not. Just because people are vaccinated DOESN'T mean they dont spread the virus. So just be sensible, have guests wash hands and limit contact with them. If they are actually physically sick tell them to stay the f*@ away. Hope that helps.

ANSWER
8 years ago
Put a notice on Facebook eg: We understand everyone is excited to meet ...., but we are asking that everyone considers baby and makes sure they've had a recent booster, we understand if you choose not to, but if that is the case we ask that you wait until after .... Has had their 6 week vaccinations. Also please be considerate and postpone visits if you are at all unwell, we will not be offended if you have to delay your visit, but we will be very upset if you come over to share your germs! Thanks etc etc. I'd also put a note to the same effect on your front door. And maybe add something about no kissing and no touching the face.

ANSWER
9 years ago
That's just being ridiculous! Telling people what to put in their body. Are you going to take full responsibility if they have an adverse reaction to the vaccine? Are you going to care for them if they're disabled for the rest of their life like many have been from vaccines?
Are you keeping your baby home and away from ALL public places like shopping centres/parks/ caffes where there might be unvaccinated people? Don't be over controlling. Worry bout you're baby but stop telling other people what to do.They are adults and can decide for themselves what they want or don't want in their bodies without you dictating it to them.

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REPLY
9 years ago
She is just saying not to visit they don't have to have the vaccine.

REPLY
9 years ago
Agree with you.

REPLY
9 years ago
Good question, are you going to keep baby at home for 6 weeks?

REPLY
9 years ago
No rediculous at all. They most certainly have the right to not have the vaccine but she is saying to not come near her newborn until after the newborn is covered but it's own vaccine. Would they care for HER baby if it was gasping for breath and dying a painful miserable death from whooping cough??? Just incredible!!!

REPLY
9 years ago
No, she has made an informed decision to prevent the risk of her baby getting sick, especially with the whooping cough. Why would you people be so against that? She's just saying if people aren't up to date on their boosters to stay away. It's actually midwife recommended. Maybe you should get an education 😉

REPLY
9 years ago
She is not controlling what they put in their body. She is saying that they can wait till baby is protected or get their own vaccines. No guns to their heads while they are chained getting a needle. Calm the fuck down.

REPLY
9 years ago
Your an idiot how is she telling them what to do to their body? You have the choice not to vax just respect the wishes of the babies mum and wait a few weeks to visit

REPLY
8 years ago
Dumbest comment I have ever read.

ANSWER
9 years ago
You will never regret standing up for your child, you will regret it if you don't.
Personal experience

ANSWER
9 years ago
I get it that you would like to protect your newborn from illnesses etc, but does your no unimmunised visitors request also apply to the nurses, doctors and midwives? They are exposed to all sorts of diseases/viruses working with sick people 24/7 i had my baby 6wks ago, had a shared room with 2 other woman & babies the woman in the cubicle next to me had jst had a c-section and also had a sore throat a chest infection and pneumonia and coughed n spluttered all day n night she had drs n nurses in and out constantly i didnt see one of them wash their hands before they came to my cubicle. Surely there would of been some sort of contagions in the air?? Needless to say the staff seemed to think it was fine to roomshare, anyway just saying there are diseases everywhere especially in hospitals so you can't, exposure to the world and its viruses helps build immunity, what do u think is in a vaccine?? And before you jump down my throat all four of my children are immunised just saying you cant be too precious

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REPLY
9 years ago
*can't stop exposure

REPLY
9 years ago
I'm going through a private hospital which guarantees a private room. I've never once see anyone there be so unhygienic and I know for a fact that they have to up to date with their immunisations. My sister is a nurse and my BIL's partner is a midwife.

ANSWER
9 years ago
Original poster here. Thanks to everyone who took the time to respond in a genuinely kind and nonjudgmental way! Yes, I am a first time mum, and my midwives and the hospital I am going through were actually the ones to recommended no unvaccinated visitors for the first 6 weeks. And yes, that will apply to people who are sick as well. I don't think that it's like I'm telling people what to do with their bodies, I mean, it will only be immediate family (parents and siblings) visiting for the first 6 weeks, so if they chose not to vaccinate, then they could visit after the 6 week mark. I'm not judging either way, I just hope that they understand my choice and respect it.
And I actually think it's ridiculous the people calling me over controlling, how is me choosing who can see MY child for 6 weeks controlling? I'm just doing what is medically recommended to try to give my baby the best possible start in life.
Thanks again to everyone who gave helpful advice in addressing those few family members, I appreciate it! :)

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REPLY
9 years ago
I think your doing the smart thing. I never worried about that because , no one visited anyway but I made my partner at the time get fully up to date and only took them in for midwife check ups

REPLY
9 years ago
I completely agree with you. You're your baby's advocate. They can't make decisions for themselves and so you need to. Some of those are decisions others wouldn't make, but it's none of their business what you decide is best, for YOUR child. Yep, people are going to tell you you're being ridiculous and over the top but too bad. They can have their opinion, but you are the one ultimately responsible for this little person, and so you have to do what YOU thing is best. And that applies to all aspects of parenting. People have an opinion on it all. If it's something you feel strongly about, stick to your guns.

REPLY
9 years ago
I would be checking that your healthcare professionals are up to date! Have you asked them? I went through a public system and my midwife changed most times I asked one of the midwives if she was up to date and she wasn't! They don't HAVE to have booster shots!!! Which makes me wonder why??!! Crazy!

ANSWER
9 years ago
Vaccinated does not mean healthy, just like unvaccinated doesn't automatically mean sick and diseased. Just because someone is unvaccinated doesn't mean they are spreading disease.You should keep sick people away from your baby and vaccine status should have nothing to do with it.

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REPLY
9 years ago
Just because thats your opinion doesbt mean your right.

REPLY
9 years ago
Thats good advice.

REPLY
9 years ago
This is not true?? You do know that infants die from whooping cough? And often the person that gave it to baby didn't even know they had it. Common sense to expect visitors to be up to date on their boosters. Why wouldn't you do everything you could to protect your child?

REPLY
9 years ago
Good lord are you serious?

Mumma you do what feels right, unvaxed is potentially dangerous for baby. Many serious illnesses have no obvious symptoms at first.

ANSWER
9 years ago
Boostrix (diphtheria/tetanus/whooping cough immunisation) is now recommended for women over 28 weeks pregnant, for every pregnancy. This assists in provided antibodies for your unborn/post natally up to 6 weeks when they receive the first whooping cough containing immunisations. This is available from your GP/antenatal care provider. It is now an Australian immunisation register recommendation.

ANSWER
9 years ago
Im fully pro vaccinate. However I do feel some people just take things too far. I assume then that you will be having a home birth and not a hospital. And that NO one leaves the house for 6 weeks.

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REPLY
9 years ago
some people actually care about the health of their newborn, so yes, she/ a lot of people are like this.

REPLY
9 years ago
Exactly! I was in a shared room in a hospital after I gave birth and I hadn't had any boosters nor did anyone that visited me, and the other people in the room were none the wiser

ANSWER
9 years ago
Dramatic, sounds like a first time mother!

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REPLY
9 years ago
Yes I felt like this first time around. Though it could make her feel much more relaxed and is actually very sensible.

REPLY
9 years ago
Sounds like a mum who really cares about her babies health and well being to me. I have met many first time mothers who are more sensible and knowledgeable than mothers with three kids

REPLY
9 years ago
That's what I thought when I read it: first time mom.

REPLY
9 years ago
Actually, many people with multiple children are asking others to get whopping cough vaccinations now.

ANSWER
9 years ago
And if they told you they had the vaccine but didn't really then you'd be none the wiser

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REPLY
9 years ago
yeah well she's gonna figure out that one or more of her family members is a lying piece of shit and therefore has a chance to cut them right out of their life there and then!

It's called common decency, something you lack obviously.

REPLY
9 years ago
An easy way to find out if the friends and family really did get vaccinated is to ask for their vaccination reccord cards which are given to people to have a record of when they are due to get boosters next

REPLY
9 years ago
Why would anyone lie about something so important?

ANSWER
9 years ago
What if they want to get the booster but can't? It can be very difficult to find the whopping cough vaccine on its own at the moment. Have had some heart broken grandparents at work when we tell them it's unavailable and there's no word on when it will be back in stock and it's not as simple as going to another pharmacy to get it.

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REPLY
9 years ago
Then they will have to wait, its sucks yes. But my child's health comes before someone wanting to see them

ANSWER
9 years ago
What about people that cannot be vaccinated? I have an autoimmune disease and so can't be vaccinated with live vaccines. Though this also means I make more of an effort to stay away from anyone that is sick, and my own chronic illness (not contagious) means the majority of my time is spent at home / semi quarantined.
Hypothetically, would I be able to visit your newborn?

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REPLY
9 years ago
You are not her family or friend. What an absolutely stupid response that has nothing to do with the question

REPLY
9 years ago
Id make you wait 6 weeks, I understand your point but my childs health comes first rather then your want to see my new born.

REPLY
9 years ago
I'm the poster, and that doesn't even apply to my situation. Only immediate family will be visiting the baby for the first 6 weeks, and I know for a fact that none of them have that problem.

ANSWER
9 years ago
OMG. That baby is going to be over protected. Fact.

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REPLY
9 years ago
Better than dying of whopping cough.... I wonder if parents who have lost their children to preventable diseases wish they were more protected??

REPLY
9 years ago
Overprotected? More like common sense.

REPLY
9 years ago
Helicopter parenting in 3, 2,1....

REPLY
9 years ago
Better than neglect, feel sad your poor babies don't mummies who do everything in their power to protect them.

REPLY
9 years ago
This is obviously a bogan more concerned with her next packet of ciggies. Lol

REPLY
9 years ago
Overprotected that is bullocks it's pretty sensible. Overprotected is just a word neglectful mummies use to those of us who do everything they can to give babies their best start to life. You're clearly going to make a great parent Op good luck with it all

REPLY
9 years ago
Let me guess... You are all those mums who don't allow your kids any sugar ;-)

ANSWER
9 years ago
If your not going to allow family/friends to visit if sick or unvaccinated then you should also be spending those 6 weeks at home. Don't take baby anywhere!

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REPLY
9 years ago
A lot of people dont these days

ANSWER
9 years ago
You know having the whooping cough booster doesn't guarantee you won't get whooping cough right? What it does is makes the disease less severe if you do get it, so someone thats been vaccinated can only have a mild cough or not even, for adults just a tickly throat, think nothing of it and spread it round. So the unvaccinated are actually more likely to be aware if they have it than the vaccinated and sick people will generally have the common sense to stay away from babies.

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REPLY
9 years ago
Lol, sorry sweetie this is wrong and terrible advice

REPLY
9 years ago
Vaccination has been proven time and time again to minimise the risk of getting whopping cough. Car seats don't always mean your baby will be safe either, but every time you get in the car you sure buckle them up in their car seat. No different

ANSWER
9 years ago
Your choice hun. I would put the health and welfare of my baby first before the visitors who want to spend time with baby. Face palm to the antivaxxers or nay sayers. Science always proves otherwise

ANSWER
9 years ago
If anyone is sick or a hint or sickeness should stay away. I am fully vaccinated but I still got whooping cough,mild case but at first you may think you have a cold or asthma. What I am saying is don't "relax" just because people are vaccinated. less people handling the baby the better.

ANSWER
9 years ago
It always saddens me at how judgemental other mothers are on each other. Being a mum is a tough job where you second guess yourself and deal with a lot of judgements and guilt. Why do other mothers feel the need to judge each other with their opinions and criticism. No one knows their baby and situation better than the mother. If this is what this mother feels is best for her baby then she should most definitely do it and stick to your guns. There is always someone ready to tell you you are doing it wrong or a better way to do it. We need to support other mothers and their decisions not judge them.

ANSWER
9 years ago
Make sure you get the whooping cough vaccine prior to birth..... this will help protect you and your newborn until your babe can get the first vaccine!

ANSWER
9 years ago
Good on you. We need to make this the norm. I asked all close friends and family who wanted to visit to please be vaccinated. Some refused and I said no problem, we will try catch you after bub has had hers. Also that poor baby who recently lost his fight for whooping cough parents run a Facebook page raising awareness and recommend what you are doing. They have a post you can share on your page informing friends and family of your expectations and why. I think the page is Light for Riley. xx

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REPLY
9 years ago
The page is Light for Riley. Sad to say the family does not know how he contracted whooping cough and possibly never will. Seeing what theyve gone through I dont think a mother can be too cautious about who comes in contact with their newborn. I am horrified by friends that we thought were immunised for sake of their own child were not, and were in close contact with all three of ours. Better to be tough than the alternative.

REPLY
9 years ago
You do realise that Riley's mother actually had whooping cough herself? I was on a forum site and she was on it and confirmed after Bub was born that she had a severe cough that ripped her stitches open and her stomach hurt from coughing... As soon as Bub passed she deleted all those posts... I wouldn't want the world to know I passed it onto my child either... But the message they are sending out isn't right. It should be that ANYONE who is sick should stay away, vaccination status is irrelevant.

REPLY
9 years ago
That comment above is extremely wrong about Riley's mum! How dare you. Vaccination status is not relevant, it's what this is all about!

ANSWER
9 years ago
I have asked immediate family to make sure that their boosters are up to date and they all agree and have done so. As with other relatives and friends, i cant control that at all. Having said that, if someone comes and visits while sick, i will restrict them access to baby but then again isnt that common sense? Don't visit if you are unwell???

ANSWER
9 years ago
Vaccines don't prevent whooping cough, they just reduce the severity. We asked for no visitors in hospital or for the first week so we could get the hang of feeding and she could put on weight. When people came over, we checked they weren't sick, asked them to wash their hand and we tried to leave her in her cot as much as possible.

ANSWER
9 years ago
Your baby your choice. You do what right for you.
As for relatives/friends not being able to get booster shots, your baby didn't pop out over night.

ANSWER
9 years ago
I drew a flat line. No visitors until 6 weeks. Gave me time to recover and adjust. I didn't want my nieces and nephews germy hands all over my new bub.

ANSWER
9 years ago
You are not be unreasonable at all. They will get over it I assure you. You won't regret it but if something happens to bub you and your husband are the ones that will have to live with the pain.

ANSWER
9 years ago
And get them to wash their hands before handling Bub. Put a plastic rain cover over the pram when out it s sheet and say Bubs is sleeping when you go out. Your baby. Your choice.

ANSWER
9 years ago
Be open and honest and if they don't like it tough luck. Baby's health and Mums sanity come first !!

ANSWER
9 years ago
Be straight with them, you have a baby to protect.

ANSWER
9 years ago
Have you talked to your dad about it?
If he won't listen just keep putting them off visiting as you until bub is 6 weeks. If they just turn up say its the babys sleep time.