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White tie dress code

Has anyone been to a white tie formal event? It's the most formal dress code. I'd like to host an event but I'm not sure how well it would go down with some of the people in my life. A general public consensus would be great.

Would you attend (or have you attended) a white tie event?

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Answers (19)

Thank you all for your responses and time. I apologise for not clicking the "identify me as OP" button, it's something I rarely click.
After reading your responses, and discussing this with my partner, we've decided to host an outdoor event instead. With less formalities. As much as I would enjoy a white tie dinner, I feel now that it would be better to have a more inclusive event. This would better attract people and hopefully get more donations going for the charity in mind.
Again, I really appreciate your judgement here and the wonderful suggestions you put forth (including that one troll who tried to sully the thread with their homophobia - rest assured dear, plenty of LGBT+ guests will be invited, and I'm sure they'll love your suggestion for a magic show).

 I love all your responses. You’ve thanked everyone, regardless of their opinion. A great conversation thread. Love your handling of the troll too! I think an outdoor event with less formalities is perfect. I’d definitely attend that one. Hope it goes well.
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SAHM Staff. Can you please hire this lady as a moderator? 🙏

 Lol
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If your paying for my dress i'm coming if not cough cough i'm coming down with something that night.

 Hahaha, this made me giggle. There are places that rent gowns out.

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 Glad I could brighten your day 😊
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You really need to understand your target demographic. There's likely a reason White Tie isn't used much. Also, consider that your venue, food & entertainment must match that code.

Hiring a gown might work for some, but not for most people. Sometimes such a fancy code can make people anxious.

 Thanks for your reply. That's some great points to consider.
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I’d love to attend! Any reason to dress up 👏👏👏

I think when covid is over go foe it,we only live once so if u want to have it throw your white tie event go for it

So gay

 It wouldn't be for an LGBT+ charity. It would be a ball for a medical charity. But I like the way you think. More LGBT+ support groups need donations. In fact, if you give me your name I'd be happy to make a small contribution in your honour.
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 I love OP. That was the best response 😂
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  Just for poofs
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 OP, you are on fire, the winner and are The Master of the internet.... I bow to you...
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 The homophobic ones usually turn out to be the 'poofs' as the troll put it not so eloquently 💜
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 Thank you all for your kind words.
"Just for poofs" - you're full of good ideas today! A magic show would be very enjoyable. "Ladies and gentlemen, please carefully observe this white dove. Abracadabra!" And poof! It's gone. Where did it go? I don't know. What a cracking idea.

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SAHM Staff I would usually delete this sort of thing but OP you have done so well answering it that I shall leave it here. Well done!
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 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
You're the best OP ever ❤

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 Lol
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Yes, it definitely depends on the type of event. White tie for a gala ball would be fine, but on the other hand rare for a wedding for example.

 Thank you. I was thinking it would be for a charity ball.
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  Any charity in particular?
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I made my wedding nominally a white tie event (honestly I just adore tail coats), but understood many people don't know the difference between black & white tie, and I'd rather people come and have a good time anyway without needing to spend money... So the wedding party was in white tie, our immediate families, and everyone else dressed fancy and looked lovely. I do think it's nice to have themed events, but don't agree in forcing people to spend money or otherwise make themselves uncomfortable. Kind of like costume parties; I host them because I find them fun, but costumes can take a lot of time and/or money so sometimes I have relaxed "consequences" like silly themed masks/hats I provide or when we were younger and wilder, penalty shots. :)

(I also felt that setting the dress code as high as possible would mean most people would reach a cocktail/black tie standard (and they did! Only one uncle arrived in a Hawaiian shirt and shorts, the larrikin))

 That sounds like a lovely wedding. I feel very similar regarding costume parties. My own wedding was themed, although not as formal as yours.
We've decided to go ahead with an outdoor picnic style get together. We're hoping to raise money for a specific charity, and this style of event feels better for that. So instead of people spending a squillion dollarbucks on their attire, they can donate whatever they're comfortable donating (if at all, I won't shame them).

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 ❤🙏
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Personally I’d hate it, but that’s just because I have low self esteem and am not girly at all. I hate getting dressed up. Also, I have never heard of a white tie event before! But go for it if you want.

 Thank you, I appreciate your response 🙂
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 *whispers* women also look incredible in tail coats/traditionally male white tie attire 👀
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 *whispers back* I know. I saw a picture of Zendaya in a monochromatic pants suit - omg 😍
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My kids would love it as they wear their tuxedo every chance possible. It cost me $300 for two basic tuxedos from Lowe’s so I am glad they want to wear them heaps but I don’t think many people would fork out for such clothing unless for super special events

 This is the crazyest most shocking thing ive ever read on the internet.
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 Oh I love the little suits for kids. They look so darling in them! Way to go you for teaching your boys how to rock a suit.
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 Op to this comment, if you think this is crazy you should spend a week in our home lol
They are currently saving their pocket money to go for a ride in a helicopter, they will no doubt suit up for that too.
They made flyers advertising free unicorn rides at the local park just to see if anyone would believe it and call, with a disclaimer saying it’s not a good idea if you get car sick on bumpy roads because the unicorn sometimes gives a bumpy ride while flying about.

I didn’t even buy these suits for a special event to start with, although I live in hope they still fit them come the next family wedding. They look great in them!

Oh and the gay comments had me spitting out my tea, I have a girl and a boy. My son is a typical boy, my daughter rocks her tuxedo just like my son. My daughters dress shirt is more fitted so it looks more feminine. I am not sure if she’s gay, bi or whatever, she’s too young to know. I just go with the flow. They asked for them for months




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I would go 100% but that’s me. Any excuse to get dressed up and feel amazing for a night. If people want to go they will, if not then maybe you could host a more low key event in a few months for those who either can’t afford new dresses/suits. Maybe white tie dinner, then a family picnic event? Then you broaden to more people and those who wish to attend either one, the other or both have a choice.

 A picnic sounds like an even better idea than a formal event. And the plus side is by the time this takes place, the weather should be warm enough to make use of one of the beautiful parks in my area. Good thinking 99!
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Will you budget for the event actually match this theme? I went to a black tie ball and it felt so stupid to be so dressed up when everything else was so mid budget and mediocre 😬

 I feel like I have an adequate amount set aside, but perhaps more would be better.
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Just know that some people may not be able to afford a gown ( even hiring one), hair, make up etc . And those people may feel guilted into going because of the cause but then they’re left in financial distress.

 Thank you for your reply. I think you have a good point. I certainly don't want people to feel like they need to put themselves in any distress to attend. You're very right.
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It sounds as though the dress code would be a novelty for your invitees, in which case, they would be renting appropriate attire (if you’re in the city this should be fine). I think a charity ball is a great way to have fun with a dress code, as your guests are free to accept or decline as suits them. I would not advise it for something like a wedding where people are less able/willing to miss the event and a rigid dress code could cause difficulty. Having said that, be prepared to graciously welcome a lot of people in dark suits and cocktail dresses.

 Thanks for your input. You made some good points for consideration
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