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Am I the bad guy?

It's my birthday this week husband is away for it so we were going to celebrate tomorrow as a family. I set aside some money for this weekend to take the kids out this morning which we did and to be able to see a movie just me and hubby tomorrow as I can't remember the last time it's was just me and hubby for anything. I set aside $300 for activities hubby said he wanted some money also coming out of 300 for a present. Is it wrong of me then to feel upset that husband has spent most of that money? On a game for a brother, some amiibos and jeans for himself? I confronted him about because I have peanuts left of my 300 and was told I was so self centred it's all about me. I even asked could he take the kids and just make card I got I'll make a card whenever I dam well like. My birthday's are always quiet I wanted to make this one feel even a little special as I don't do really anything else just for me. I now just feel like dirt am I wrong for feeling like this?


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Answers (14)

You take those things back and get a refund if you can and then leave that selfish pricks a*s

What a shitty thing your husband did! And then to call you self centred? I'm sorry you have a toddler for a husband. I hope you can stil have a nice birthday xx

No, you are not wrong and you deserve to have a nice day for your birthday. He is being selfish, he is being inconsiderate and he is being an a*s. Find something else you would like to do for your birthday that won't have to include him if he doesn't want to help you, his wife who loves him, celebrate your birthday.

No you're not wrong at all! Kick him in the a*s! And then take your kids and just use whatever money you can get your hands on on you and then. F**k the selfish a*s if that was me x

The fact that you had to ask makes me worried. I think he is doing a thing that abusive men do called gaslighting. Basically they keep telling their parter she is always in the wrong, she is crazy, she actually deserves to be treated like crap, etc etc, until she starts believing it. My advice is get away from him as soon as you can.

Happy birthday! Unfortunately, you're husband is a selfish dickbag. You've done nothing wrong. Maybe he could've gotten away with his jeans, but spending your birthday money on a game for his brother? Who the f**k does that, and to their wife no less?

 Agree with this. Especially the term dickbag 😂
helpful (3) 
 I have never heard the term dickbag before but it is now my new favourite word!!
helpful (1) 

He is gas lighting you. Please find help to make a better life for you and your children. You deserve it.

Jeez. I thought you were saying he wanted money out of the 300 to buy YOU a present, in which case I was going to say, it might not be ideal, but if money is tight, that's okay. But money on himself and his brother. F*** him.

 I agree and second this incredibly.
helpful (1) 

I spent years with birthdays like this, he is projecting his bad attitude onto you, you're in no way selfish for feeling like you do HE is incredibally selfish in his behaviour. Adult entitled toddlers have a habit of twisting bad behaviour to make you feel it is your fault and destroy any self esteem you have left.
Hind sight is wonderful, divorcing my ex narc was the best thing that happened to me.
Happy birthday xxx

 I agree with this post so much. I married your husband too. Figure of speech of course. I am so glad I am no longer married to a freaking man child. My children are better than him. More caring and kind and thoughtful. Not him though. Kick his a*s to the curb.
helpful (2) 

Hugs and happy birthday xx
Put aside some money when you can, get yourself a present and celebrate with someone other than your husband. Make certain to post it on Facebook so he can see what he has missed and add a comment of birthday treat or something.

I think you need to research narcissistic personality disorder. My father in law is a narcissist (confirmed by psychologist) and this is something straight out of his book.

This is absolutely gaslighting.

More inconsiderate that you planned to take the kids out this morning.

You aren't wrong but you were the one who handed over the cash so he's a dick but you have nobody but yourself to blame for not gettinh your birthday.