As much as everyone is giving you shit, its not uncommon. My ex asked me to move in to help with his kids, I stopped getting benefits and had to rely on him. He struggled to support us and asked me to get a job. I did, and I paid rent and bills, but stopped looking after his kids. And that meant leaving them in after school care while I picked my kids up. You need to look for a job, but start charging him $25 an hour for any cleaning or child care.

It depends. How much does he support you? If you rely mostly on him then yes I think he’s being reasonable. He earns $95k and has his 4 kids, and maybe you and your 3 kids to support as well. That’s a lot of pressure.

I have a question for you, do you still buy the house shopping when your kids aren’t with you?

I think you’re both being petty. If the relationship’s going to continue like that, then I don’t think it’s got a long future. If you’re living together, then I think it’s quite reasonable for him to support you financial while you study and you support him to work full time my taking care of him and looking after all the kids and the house.
Presumably you’ll gain employment once you’ve finished your studies and qualified.
I’m just curious though, if you don’t qualify for any payments, how do you pay for groceries?

Move on..

Has he said why he wants you to get a job?

Get a job.
I have four kids. Work full time. Study part time three nights a week.
I would take extra weekend shifts in a heartbeat if I had to to support my family or they needed something which required me to work extra nights.

Quit your whining.

In all fairness its expensive to live these days. 9 pwople is a lot for one person to have to solely financially support. As much as it may sting to hear you sound selfish in your behaviour. You pay no rent or bills and dont even cook for him and his kids. Its meant to be a partnership. Which means 50/50 that also means you treating his kids well.

Well money doesnt grow on trees. Most people have to work to support themselves through study and work to support their kids - And before you ask, I have 3 kids under 10 and I work part time and study part time.

I think you are very lucky to not have to work. I work full time and study part time because my husband has asked me to contribute financially. Life is expensive and we only have two children! Perhaps you could negotiate with him with regards to housework and cooking. My husband and I share a lot of the workload because I work evenings but also have early morning starts. It’s all about working together.

U wont cook for his kids?! Well why should he do anything for yours like, hmmm i dont know just off the top of my head, pay for and support them?! Maybe u shd get a job! Decide if u r family or not. Ps 95000 isnt a lot to support 9 ppl! He needs some help, study is a luxury not a necessity

If he is supporting you and your kids, perhaps he is feeling resentment about it.
I had a partner who i just separated from because i always worked full-time until this year, and it was like i was torturing him asking him to pay half the bills and rent and his opinion was but your kids use more power and take up more space in the house they have a dad that should be paying for them. Ugh. I feel he should pay half as my partner, he felt he shouldn't have to support my children.

Th iink in all fairness if you bring nothing in but raise the kids and do the housework and cooking and that was agreed then you should discuss this with him rathed than online with strangers. Fair or not I think its something BOTH of you need to discuss. Is he paying for everything? If so maybehe is tired of paying and having the burden of all kids his and now urs. Especially on one income.

I think you have some nerve to complain! They aren't his kids you don't get a benefit and if you don't work sounds like you don't contribute financially plus you are immature and spiteful by then not cooking his kids dinner despite him supporting you and your kids financially while you study!

Get a grip lady! He's only asked you to work part time it's not the end of the world he needs help and support. Defer your course, drop a subject HELP YOUR PARTNER AND FAMILY! you're being selfish and immature