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Friends after sex?

Answered 5 years ago

About 6 months ago i met a guy and we became friends, recently we have been spending lot more time together and it looked like we were going to start a relationship there was a lot of chemistry between us and he is so sweet and unlike any other guy I had met
Yesterday I went to his place to study together like we usually do and we ended up making love it was like nothing I have experienced he was so sweet and kind and did not take his eyes off me and kept asking if I was ok
WE SPent somr time together after but as soon as I left I realised I don’t feel anything for him I do care for him but I don’t know what changed..I don’t want to hurt him and want to keep him as a friend because I could not bear to loose him and I see him a lot at tafe
I’m so confused please help me
We are 32 and 36 so it should not be so confusing


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ANSWER
5 years ago
It really depends on how he feels. If he is wanting more than a friendship, it might be hard for him to just flick a switch and go back to that after you crossed that line yesterday. If he doesn’t want more, then you could. But I think the boundaries would need to be very clear. Was yesterday a one off, or is it a friends with benefits situation. Either way, sex complicates things when you have no intention of a romantic relatuinship, so be prepared to lose him all together.

ANSWER
5 years ago
Even if you don't have strong chemistry, and after a while want to go back to being friends, it is possible. It just has to be handled carefully.
The transition is a lot easier if both parties realise it, so there are no badly hurt feelings.
I have ended up with long term really great male friends, from what were originally sexual relationships.
What made you get on so well as friends will always be there.
Sometimes that's the type of relationship you are best suited to.

ANSWER
5 years ago
6 months is a bit too early to figure out feelings. You’ve spent most of your time as “friends”
You’re probably overwhelmed by how nice he was and freaked out, I’m assuming you’ve been with alot of douchebags in your time.
You don’t need to force feelings or make plans to get married. You can continue to be friends as long as you both communicate along the way what the boundaries are or what you both expect of each other now that you have “gone there”
Try picture him “making love” as you put it with someone else, does that make you jealous, uncomfortable etc if yes then yes you have feelings for him. Good luck

Replies

REPLY
5 years ago
This. Great answer.

ANSWER
5 years ago
Hmmm no. You can't go back. You've crossed a line where someone's feelings are going to get hurt.