Am I being ridiculous? My husband travels for sports with our son on the weekends, which is nice so I don’t have to. He
Answered 2 years ago
Am I being ridiculous? My husband travels for sports with our son on the weekends, which is nice so I don’t have to. He parties with his friends and loves it, which is fine as long as he isn’t driving drunk. This is the third weekend in a row that he has had to travel on Saturday morn to Sunday evening. It is also the third weekend in a row that he has decided to spend Friday night as well having drinks with his a friend he will see over the weekend and sometimes some other random people that show up.
I stay home watching tv alone, bc I’m 45 and I don’t want that party life anymore. I prefer to watch a tv show or movie w him, but he says no.
I also don’t think it’s right for him to drop this on me on Friday night, when I am assuming I won’t be spending the night alone. I do however need to pick my daughter up from her activities that night. So it’s only 2.5hours he is gone.
Am I hurt and lonely and feel taken for granted. Am I overreacting? Thanks for your honesty.
Last 2 weekends he came home drunk driving my kid and after two dui’s many years ago. That is all besides the fact. We know that’s wrong and he’s working on it, but what about just leaving me home alone all weekend third in a row?
I think a good husband would be spending at least 1 night on the weekend with his wife if possible. After 22 years of marriage, I can see boredom...63%
Have an answer?
I think educate your kids to refuse to get in the car with him if he's been drinking and completely call him on it so he feels ashamed, hopefully. Get a family uber account so your kids would have another option to get home.
Perhaps you can take over some of the trips away without hubby to break the pattern of him being with the friends all weekend
From August-December (5mths) I’ve gone on every hockey trip which was almost every weekend and drank and partied with our friends all weekend. I do same w another sport of ours when hockey is over. Every year the same thing happens. He is so annihilated that he can’t walk straight and slurs his words and drives drunk eventually. He gets worse as the season goes on to the point where he is making poor decisions like drunk driving. I put my foot down on the that, the cyber affairs he was having, and the lying. We also had date nights every wed in which we continued to drink and got drunk at home. So as you can see I am the farthest thing from a grandma. Lol.
From August-December (5mths) I’ve gone on every sports trip which was almost every weekend and drank and partied with our friends all weekend. I do same w another sport in the off season. Every year the same thing happens. He is so annihilated that he can’t walk straight and slurs his words. He gets worse as the season goes on to the point where he is making poor decisions like drunk driving w our son. I put my foot down on that, the cyber affairs he was having, and the lying.
I just wanted one fun cuddle night alone w him this month, maybe make out and maybe he would even be able to perform for the first time in a year since he is always so drunk he cannot.
Our teenage son doesn’t even want to be around him anymore bc he annoys him exactly like he does me when he’s drunk (often). Then he gets mad and passive aggressively drinks more when we’re not laughing at his childish actions.
I just want to know besides that and all the other issues we have, how does everyone feel about only this incident I spoke of? Am I overly sensitive and how often do married men go out for drinks w their friends on weekends? Or maybe they go during week?
Just to be clear, you think I shouldn’t be upset that on Valentine’s Day, instead of being w me wherever, he decided at the last minute he tells me he is going out. Then he invited me to go along w him and a friend to talk hockey at a hockey rink with no other women around.
All of my 45 year old friends had plans w their husbands and boyfriends already and they wouldn’t want to hang out at an ice rink bar anyways. On Val day they stay at home or go out, but as long as they’re together that’s all that matters in my opinion. Asking and compromise would have been nice.
And I agree W you. Oh believe me the drunk driving thing has drastically decreased to almost never Bc I put my foot down. I know it should be never, but I can’t physically force him to not drink a drop and not ever make a mistake again. I would have to get police involved and I don’t want to do that. I Tried to stop him and he drank more. I can’t walk away From him after one incident in months after he stopped for longer then ever and is actually changing in that category as far as I know.
I get the sports thing, but kids would be devastated if they were forced to quit what they love. They would never forgive me.
Oh and I stopped traveling w them for sports in the past 2 months bc I’m sick of watching him stay up all night w friends in the hotel drinking himself into oblivion and then frustrating me like an 8 year old kid that wants attention and gets mad and mean when I don’t think everything is hilarious like he does bc he’s wasted.
I think I’m in a no win here. He is on some meds and getting off them, so my only hope is that coupled w alcohol has made him lose his mind and he will be normal when he is off. Thx for trying everyone!!
Nothing I can do to change this. 😢