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What time is reasonable for older kids to be in their rooms, or be quiet in lounge?

Answered 4 years ago

My husbands children have moved in with us, they are 17 and 19. My husband works in the evening so I generally put my kids to bed at 8 and do a quick tidy up, and I usually watch TV at 830. The problem is having to argue now with the older two over what I watch. They both have devices and can watch what they like in their rooms. Is it fair to make a rule at 830 they can either go to their rooms, or if they want to stay in the lounge they watch what I put on? How do other deal with this? I'm not used to older kids.


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ANSWER
4 years ago
The 19 year old should be living with room mate or mates or on their own

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REPLY
4 years ago
I have a 19 year old. Full time uni and two part time jobs ( prior to Covid). There’s no way she could afford to live on her own. Nothing wrong with a young adult still being at home.

REPLY
4 years ago
No he looked into a share house and that and uni would be too much.

REPLY
4 years ago
Too much? Having done it like most people, I’m curious what too much means

ANSWER
4 years ago
I've got kids this age and I literally can't get them to watch TV with me any more 😂 they're too busy socialising, if they're actually home they have friends over and in they're own space. Can you set up their own space for them? Foster their independence?

ANSWER
4 years ago
I had this issue with my ex. It never got better because my ex never enforced anything and my steppies jsut walked all over me and nothing was done about it. As soon as I would say something it was always me just being a bitch. I got sick of it and left, I moved myself and our 2 younger kids out and we've never been happier. He has since kicked his adult children out because they were too much of a pain in the ass and apologized to me for not taking it more seriously. I still live in my own house and we see each other a few days a week. I refuse to speak to one of the adult children because he is so disrespectful. I do not deserve to be treated like shit, I don't care who you are.

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REPLY
4 years ago
Oh that sounds terrible. My step sons are not too bad, this really is the only issue (a few small ones but nothing I can't manage). I can just tell them its my time, but I'm not sure if that's unfair.

REPLY
4 years ago
I wish you luck mate. My adult step kids were great at first too, after a while it just became one thing after the other.

REPLY
4 years ago
They know they will be out if they are disrespectful. They respect the few rules they have.

ANSWER
4 years ago
I think it’s fair to kick them out of the lounge. I spend my days working. Kids come home from school or uni and have ‘their’ time up until dinner. After dinner and clean up it’s ‘my’ time. They respect that so I’m lucky.

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REPLY
4 years ago
Thanks