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What to do when I wake up to my husband masturbating in bed?

The other night I was woken up by movement in our bed. As I rolled my head over I could see my husband openly masturbating and his movements are what must have woke me.

I closed my eyes and ignored what was going on while he finished what he was doing. I have no idea if this is the first time he's done this or if it is a regular thing that I have never noticed.

How should I have handled this or how should I handle it if it happens again in the future?


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Answers (25)

Join in! Either on him or sort yourself out! My husband does it in his sleep or grinds the mattress, so do I. I wake up to orgasm, it's great 😂

I must be a prude, this would bother me! Nothing against masturbating I do it all the time but it should be done in private. Why wank and not wake you up for sex? Why not go somewhere else and do it? I find it a bit disrespectful to be honest. Like they must be thinking of someone else or they would be trying it on you, you're laying right there if he wanted you he could have you. Or at least try.

 probably just wants sleep but the chemistry of being next to you or the events of the day or just not having released in a while is keeping him restless. too tired to make an effort, but desperate for sleep
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helpful (0) 

Hmm doing it right there beside you is a bit disrespectful in my opinion.

 I think if he did it on or over her would totally a turn on, my hub does it all the time, starts with rubbing it gently on me then stops and if I respond he involves me , if I don't he doesn't wake me....mmm

helpful (3) 
 ^ That would definitely not be a turn-on for me, it would just wake me up and piss me off. If I’m sleeping, leave me alone!
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 I agree, if he doesn't include me in it, it's disrespectful. It would be a real turn on if he was including me, but I turn over, his headphones in while he's watching phub is way too selfish. I'm prepared to be disengaged all day because of how our morning started. If you want to do that by yourself great, get up and go hide in the bathroom.
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This just happened to me and I’m completely creeped out.

Couldn’t even tell you how many times I’ve woken up to my dude jerking it to porn in bed! 😂 couldn’t give a rats a*s tbh. The shaking bed has annoyed me countless times tho ha! Sometimes I join in, other times I roll over and go back to sleep.

If it bothers you then its not on. Each relationship has its own sets of boundaries and standards.
Communication is key.
If this behaviour you feel is something best done in private then explain that to him.
In future he should just go have a shower. Waking a sleepy mummy can be like poking a hungry bear.
I personally couldnt imagine my husband doing this. Hes a private man and wont even poop infront of me but will proudly yell "oh no honey there is something wrong with the toilet. Quick come here" have me running only to discover a dam foot long sub wedged against the side of the bowl while he stands there triumphant with his creation

 This Is Disgusting!!!! I'd be absolutely horrified if my husband ever did this. Yuck!
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 Why horrified? Everyone gets horny and sometimes you need to rub one out to fall asleep. Sheesh
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I dunno I think it's weird. I don't give a sh+t if husband does it and I do it to when no one is home. And he will do it in the shower usually so there is no mess. It doesn't cut down on our sex life. Masturbation is healthy and sometimes you need me time but doing it while ur asleep next to him is weird to me. Maybe he wanted you to wake up and join in (a weird way to get you going) who knows but if my hubby did it I'd be like wtf you doing in trying to sleep go do that else where lol

 Basically how I feel too
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Completely normal, he's probably been doing it since he was 15

Doesnt bother me, my husband masturbates all the time.

It's completely normal, he's being considerate by not waking u up for sex so that's good! Most of the time I just join in though :)

 That was my thought too, i would think he just didnt want to wake you up.
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If you dont feel like joining in kust leave him alone. He isnt bothering you to have sex with him so bonus but if you want sex join