Ask SAHM is a place where you can ask our staff & community a question safely & anonymously. Please read our disclaimer.

From an over thinker....

She texts: ‘I like u & I want u’
He texts back: ‘I too like ur company & enjoy u’

Same meaning??


Got an Answer?

Answers (15)

Definitely not imo. Hers says I want to be with you. His says I want to be friends with you.

 OP here: when I said I wanted him, I meant sexually as we’ve fooled around but not the whole act yet.
helpful (0) 
 I agree. I'm getting friendzone vibes.
helpful (1) 

Hmm maybe not the exact same meaning but I think ur both saying u like each other, I like u/I like ur company, that’s the same to me. IMO, u like someone’s company if u like them. He enjoys being with u. My experience is males speak differently

I say enjoy what you have for however long it lasts. Men don't think like we do so don't read too much into it. xx

I’m very much enjoying what’s happening however I’ve always been an overthinker; it’s the thief of joy!

helpful (0) 

OP, when you say he’s older - how old is he? 40s? I’m wondering why he’s single? Is he one that doesn’t want commitment? I feel that what you communicated in your message is different to what he is communicating. He is saying that he likes being friends with benefits - but nothing more. Whereas I feel like you have stronger feelings for him. Good luck x

 He’s early 50s. And got anyone wondering or yet to imply based on our age difference, no, he doesn’t have cash etc
Messy divorce a little while ago.
I’m not sure why ur asking ‘why he’s single’; because he hasn’t found anyone...?
Just like when a female is single I guess.

helpful (0) 

You want an analysis?
Here goes.
You want his meat, he wants you as meat.
Forget feelings.
It's only about sex.
Have some self respect.
Define your relationship or just stay a piece of meat.
Up to you.

 Not seeing where the self respect bit comes into it
helpful (1) 

She: wants a potential solid relationship as time goes on
He: wants friends with benefits with no full on relationship commitment

But hey we’re just strangers! Can you possibly ask what the intentions are during your next face to face chat or phone conversation?!

 OP here: We are friends with benefits. I caught feels a little while ago, he told me about 3 months ago that he had feels. It’s more complicated than I’ve put here as he’s a bit older
helpful (0) 
 Are you having an affair?
helpful (0) 
 How much older?
helpful (0) 
 13yrs older. Married but separated
helpful (0) 
 To clarify, I’m married but separated. He’s single
helpful (0) 
 If he has feels too but he told you so months ago, he would have acted on it by now.
helpful (0) 
 He has acted on it; we see each other all the time 😂
helpful (0) 
 ^ok, so why are you asking us to analysing this text?
helpful (0) 
 Cos it started out around 12 months ago as casual friends etc & the mention of feelings has only been raised a little while ago.
I’m always clear, he’s extremely guarded as he’s had a rough time with ex wife.
I think he’s worried re the age difference & our other complications.
I prob shouldn’t have posted it as it really needs the background that’s just too much to get into

helpful (0) 
 ^ sounds like it way too complicated and a bit of fun is all he wants from you, for the moment at least: Don’t over think it, just go with it and see what happens.
helpful (1) 

He is correcting your awful text speak. I don’t think he has much respect for you. Sounds like a piss take.

 He would have put you not u if that was the case
helpful (0) 
 Nah he’s not. He wrote it more shorthand than that, that’s just how I typed it here
helpful (0) 
 Ok, then he wants to shag you back, otherwise could have just not responded or out right said he didn’t want you
helpful (0) 

She says I like you and I want a shag
He says I enjoy your company and I enjoy shagging you

She got a reply so I reckon
It’s a text, talk to the other person , texts are so hard to figure out sometimes especially when it comes to relationships

 OP here; it is hard & this is complicated. These messages were sent when we were a bit drunk. He said he had feels ages ago & ive made myself fairly clear. He’s a bit older so maybe this is how the oldies communicate lol

helpful (0) 
 Don't trust anything a man says when he is drinking
helpful (0) 
 Or female says lol
helpful (0) 
 Yep if he’s a bit older that’s the polite way of saying I wanna bang you in the kitchen table, he’s maybe not used to texting this kind of stuff either
helpful (0) 
 His actions speak very loudly as well tho when not drinking. He’s pretty guarded as he’s been hurt badly so the alcohol made him loosen up in text
helpful (0) 

Is there anything further on this one OP?

 Says he’s only seeing me 🤷‍♀️
helpful (0) 

I'm goanna put it out there. Why don't you just ask him?

 Too many reasons to say
helpful (0) 

Asked my male friend, he thinks you wouldn’t enjoy someone’s company if you didn’t like them, so yes he likes you. To what degree, who knows, how does he treat you, speak to you etc etc would all come into it.
You want him, he enjoys you. Again, he’s enjoying whatever you’re doing together.

If he wanted anything more, he'd say so. Your text gave him the green light to elaborate and he didn't

Hi OP. I know it's easier said then done but just give him a call or catch up with him and talk it out. It'll save you the stress and you know for sure what it is.

If he likes you, great, you can pursue a relationship if that's what you want.

If he doesn't, you can continue to be friends with benefits (if your heart is ok with that). Or you can invest your time in developing other relationships with someone who reciprocates the same feeling.

All the best x

 Thanks for response. It’ll never be a conventional relationship for many reasons, too many to post.
He rarely says much about feelings however shows it in little ways. Eg his house is cold yet he doesn’t feel it, yet when I come over, he has the heat on for me. Or he knows I love music, yet hate TV, so he puts the TV on the music channel (small victory lol)

The text he sent would’ve been hard for him to send & the 5min delay in my text to his says he chose his words carefully

He’s a bit damaged I guess but aren’t we all?!

helpful (0) 

He is not into you like you are into him. He “enjoys” you - that’s nasty.

 Nasty, what’s nasty about it. OP said he was a bit older, sounds like how an older person speaks. If she’s messing around with him she’s hope he enjoys her
helpful (0) 
 It sounds transactional- he should say enjoys our time together
helpful (0) 
 I think that’s a bit overthinking things when women start saying what men ‘should’ say.
He enjoys her, so what? It’s a turn of phrase. Transactional lol

helpful (0)