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I, too, have always been curious about it. None of my friends, or family, smoke so I never really got a chance to try it. My next door neighbor, though, is a smoker. It took me awhile to get up the nerve, since she knows me as an athletic type bicyclist, and when she apologized to me for smoking (out on her pool patio whilst surrounded by her family yet) I told her to go ahead and that I was always curious myself. She immediately beamed a bright smile and asked me if I'd like to try one then. It was rather disgusting and, as I was choking on it, she laughed quite loudly.
Over time, she would offer me one when she had one and we were outside talking. I eventually got used to them, even to the point where I started understanding their allure. In fact, I grew to enjoy them and bought my own. I don't smoke heavily, perhaps 5-10 a day now, but it does happen (I'm 38 and "started" about 6 months ago) and we're now "smoking buddies" much to her delight and, yes, she doesn't apologize anymore, thankfully.
I know the negatives and will probably stop when I get tired of them but I'm happy that I now satisfied an almost lifelong curiosity despite what I feel, now, is an addiction. In fact, being addicted is what makes them so satisfying, I've discovered. :)
Hi. I started at 37. I am now 44. My husband hated it at first, he refused to touch me or kiss me for months! It was horrible. I was really anti smoking before I started. My husband cooled and now he loves watching me smoke. I smoke about a pack a day now. The smoke causes my heart to beat faster and I love how relaxed I feel..our lovemaking has increased which is not a bad thing. I love my after sex cigarette, my husband's head resting on my breast. I am a runner and still in pretty good shape although I smoke!
Tell her. It might talk some sense into her. I've left someone 3 years into the relationship because he started smoking. I was so embarrassed to be with him, and hated being seen in public with him, with him spending half the night outside the bar, restaurant , etc puffing away. So gross.
Just go and light up, make your day and that of those having to put up with your attitude which stinks more than any smoke ever could.
Maybe check her phone or emails.
I think women do this later on because they've given up so much of themselves being mums & wives that they want to rebel. I get it. They want a guilty little pleasure to themselves.
My wife got a new job 5 years into our marriage and it was a stressful but very rewarding job as it pretty much doubled her salary and she started smoking and wearing high heels everyday. It took a little getting use to her breath when kissing, but I don’t mind it now, she actually looks sexier now smoking and wearing high heels all the time.
Is it the same as a partner putting on weight? Why is it unacceptable to leave someone for that but ok for smoking. Both are difficult to control and started after marriage?
There's always a reason why people smoke. Smoking is a symptom, not a cause.
Encourage her (suggest names, make the appointment?) to see a counsellor to talk through what's bothering her.
Maybe she took it up because she knows you hate it and wants you to leave her
She is cheating. She picked up smoking from her lover. You don't just wake up one day and decide to smoke. It is something she has started doing because of him.
Just a note. Most women enjoy the 120s. Remeber, they are really about 2, regulars cigarettes. My wife tried pulling that over me as well. A 120 is not a normal 5 min smoke. It's a 15 min prosess.
If my husband started smoking I'd leave. Filthy, scabby, derelict habit. Smokers are selfish morons.
Do you love her really? Or are you just going to trade her for a model that doesn't smoke? What happens if she put on weight? Are you going to be one of those men that demands she lose the baby weight after 6 months or you'll devoice her? Part of marriage is learning to accept each others faults. Does she complain about the size of your penis, the way you're going bald? Your big nose?
Gross, deal breaker for me too. It’s gross, smelly and selfish