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How did you find out your partner was having an affair?

Or were you the 'other woman' who later found out your boyfriend was actually married. Was it a once off thing or long term? Did you recover or seperate?

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Answers (8)

Gut feeling/ dreamt about the discovery via emails.

Always had his passwords never checked it. Checked it the morning after the dream.(after weeks of a gut feeling)

The email was exactly like the dream.
Called him and confronted him and it all came out

 Very similar thing happened to me with my now ex husband. He swore black and blue nothing was happening but when I went to bed at night I would see all these emails and messages in my sleep. Almost sounds bizarre but right enough...funnily though, I got concrete evidence when I was not even looking for it. I stumbled upon it when I was on his computer trying to download something for a friend.
helpful (1) 

My cousin rang and told me she had just seen him sneaking off with another chick. Well in the car i get.. it was not pretty. I ended up needing stitches in my fingers from smashing his windscreen and he needed a new suit from me tearing literal shreads from him. This happened about 12 years ago.
We did survive it though after a lengthy break and a whole lot of 'talking' (screaming matches more like) You never get back to that 100% though. More like 97%.

 Hope you were charged with damaging property
Bet he has learnt to hide his affairs

helpful (0) 

I got an std... had only been with my husband.
Second time, found a text message.
Third Time, if there’s a third time I’ll be gone before he can say sorry.

Intuition, followed by some "mild" stalking, and crazy woman investigations

 Do share what crazy woman investigations you did?!?
helpful (2) 
 Yes, after going through what I did with my ex husband, I hope to never doubt my intuition again. It is amazing how we can push it down. Even many women who are blindsided by their husbands affairs and are in complete shock still say that there was something not quite right but just push the "feeling " away.
helpful (1) 

Found the messages on FB messenger just to confirm after I found condoms in his work bag. Just started the divorce

I was cast into the role of other woman unknowingly, it was an emotional roller coaster. I put an end it once I saw I was being groomed. All I could think was how could I hurt another woman and split up a family? Although, it was more likely that what he had planned for me was mistress. From our conversations, I would say he has done this before.