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She wants to go over and play, if you say no, no means no and she can go another time. It has nothing to do with feelings.
Don’t have time to listen to your child? Yet got time to post on the internet. Ok.
You don't have time for this? To listen to your children? Wow
Of course feelings are important and so is listening to the desires of your child Children need to be able to identify what their feeling and how to cope with them and develop emotional intelligence from a young age.
They need you to give them a space where they can feel thy can come to you without fear of judgement and be able to have a rational conversation about things.
You should absolutely ask your daughter how she is and validate her feelings. You should also explain why she can't go
Maybe it might go like this....
I'm sorry we can't go and play with ....... because and state your reasons.
She will say ........ and may mention some feelings like anger and dissaptment
You: I know you're disappointed because you really wantted to go because ...(insert her reasons) and that it makes you angry that we can't go but how about we do....... Maybe we can arrange another time. I love you.
It's so crucial children have the ability to identify their feelings and feel listened to and valued rather than dismissed and rejected.
Our 4 year old can easily identify and tell us when he's sad, angry, frustrated and happy and we talk about these. It's called emotional intelligence and is super important to develop.
You don't have time to discuss your daughter's reasons and feelings attached to them yet you have time to make a post on here and read the responses.
Talk to her about it. Explain your reasoning for not wanting her to go. (I don't like sleepovers either) perhaps you could compromise and let her stay late then pick her up. Compromise is a great skill to learn. Let her know you love for her to spend time with her friends if you feel more comfortable with the kids at your house arrange a daytime playdate.