Ask SAHM is a place where you can ask our staff & community a question safely & anonymously. Please read our disclaimer.

How many kids are too many?

Just interested to find out what Mum's consider a big family.


Got an Answer?

Answers (27)

Too many is more than you can look After including financially

I consider 4 or more a big family. Not too many kids but just a big family. I am one of four and have four myself. I’d consider more than 8 too many but then again, if that’s what you can handle and afford then you do you.

I consider 4 or more kids a large family. I have 3 and there are some people I know who consider us a large family.
It’s really personal as to how many is too many, everyone’s circumstances are different in terms of support from extended family and friends and even financially.

 I have 3 too and know a lot of others who do but I dont know many with 4 these days. I wonder if its more common in country areas to have more kids?
helpful (0) 

2 kids is more than enough for me 😂. 1st baby was hell and is still giving me hell 8 years later. 2nd was a dream and loved maternity leave that time around, but for me, too risky in case I get another hell cat, the thead I’m hanging on by might snap! I guess it depends on what your kids are like, your temperament and also the amount of family support you have. I know a lady who has four kids and said she’d love to keep going and have more but they just can’t afford it-but she loves being pregnant, the baby stage etc. I’m relieved that I’m saying goodbye to that era 😂

 Lots of people love that stage but its a bad idea to keep going back just for that because the older years last much longer.
helpful (0) 

I have 4 children (twins, then two seperate babies) and honestly, since the birth of the 3rd, I've felt so overwhelmed with how many kids we have. I love them all so much, and I'd never want to NOT have them. But overwhelmed is exactly the right description for how I feel.
If others can handle having a big family, then by all means, go for it. But for me, I would say 2 was the ideal. I was at my peak with 2.

 Hugs babe ❤
helpful (2) 

I have 5 all boys including one set of twins 🙄I wouldn’t put them back, it’s been a lot but really it’s whatever’s in your heart and soul . You know deep down what you’d like to create your family.

I have 2 kids and that is the perfect amount for me so I’d consider anymore than that too many. But looking at anyone else I’d say 5 or more is a big family.

4 and over is big to me. Basically if you can't fit the whole family in a 5 seater car lol. I've got 2 and that's all I've ever wanted. I went to uni with someone who was one of 14 kids! Each to their own, I know some lovely families with 4 or 5 kids. If you can financially and mentally handle it, great 🙂

My mum once told me they used to say 3 children is a good number. 2 to replace the parents when they pass and 1 for population growth. My mum and dad are each 1 of 4 , I'm 1 of 4. I have 2 and always question my mum why 4 it's too much lol. I think over 4 is a big family!

 I have 3 and I love it, its enough to feel like a big happy family but not so many that I cant give enough attention to each child. (for me, anyway)
helpful (1) 

I know somebody with 5 kids and whinges quite a lot about their issues (some of them have health issues) and how hard it is and cant spend much time with each kid, yet is trying to conceive again. I think its attention seeking behaviour actually! That's not to say I don't think people should have 6, I don't mean that, I just mean why try for more when you are struggling a lot with what you already have.

 ^oh and also they whinge about being poor a lot. Well increasing your family size is not going to help there, is it?
helpful (0) 

I have two and feel overwhelmed, they are teens but I’m constantly worried about them and their futures.

Have as many or as little as you want. It's nobody's business really