Got an Answer?
There are as many reasons for affairs as there are people having affairs.
For me personally, he entered my life at a time that I was not feeling especially good about myself. I had just had a baby and was having a hard time keeping my emotions and weight in check. My husband tried to be supportive and said and did all the right things, but in my mind I always thought it was because he had to not because he wanted to.
When my affair partner and I met he was a great comfort to me and I was able to see myself through his eyes and he gave me the attention and support that helped lift me to where I needed to be.
Things became physical quite quickly between us and each time we slept together I felt better and better about myself. After about a year and a half we started seeing less and less of each other but I was finally in a place emotionally that I could go on with my marriage and family life without him.
We remain in touch and spent some time together after the New Year. There is no doubt that we will always be sexually attracted to each other and will probably sleep together whenever we see each other but it is no longer the continued affair it was.
My husband hasn't paid me attention for years Iv chased him begged and worked so hard to get on the same page
He's done some shitty things over the years and been so selfish at time and Iv been nothing but good and given him all that's good in his life stood by him when others wouldn't have
Over the years the resentment built up and I just snapped.
I didn't care
I don't care
But the kids are so young it's not a good time
In a few years I'll leave
I should have waited it wasn't suppose to happen but it did
I feel bad on some levels but others I just think meh he's probably doing it to me too.
It's not something I'm like super proud of but it's also not something I'm necisarily ashamed of I don't mind telling some people.
Personally I think people are selfish and crave attention. Spin in anyway you want cheating is still cheating and it's disgusting. Not happy?? Leave!
In this case, she says that she was quite happy in her marriage. Her husband gave her everything she wanted, worked hard, took her on holidays etc but so did the boyfriend. She was doted on by two men. Obviously wonderful for her ego.
She wants both men now. Doesn't want to give up her boyfriend but still wants her husband.
If i was inhappy in my previous relationship I should have left rather than being lazy and staying.
Life is too short to waste precious time on those who you just arent that into.
I was seriously considering topping myself.
He came into my life for a reason.
I was so numb I had no idea what I was doing.
Once he realised, he shifted his focus and helped me through it.
I am alive today because I cheated.
Hubby will never know. I don't think he even realised I was depressed.
A part of me feels ashamed. The other part thanks the guy for realising my situation and helping me through it.
Keep telling yourself that. Enjoy your excuse ridden denial darl.
Looks can be deceiving. Nobody knows what goes on in another person's marriage but the two in it.
Why are people’s affairs other people’s business? Why are you shocked? Sounds like if he didn’t find out nobody was getting hurt. Five years is a long time for a woman, she obviously wasn’t planning to leave her husband. Maybe she used the affair to spice up her marriage? I think it’s sad he found out and got hurt. As for the affair...meh.
I'm shocked because I didn't see it coming. They always looked so happy together. No biggie - just the best way I could describe what I thought when I found out.
Because he would rather masturbate than f**k me so i need to look for my kicks elsewhere
I dunno why’! I guess some people just simply don’t care, others have no impulse control, feeling a little incontent in your relationship. Who knows there’s a thousand reasons and more!
Me and my husband just celebrated our 7th anniversary, I admit I’ve been having the “itch” the infamous 7 year itch! I would NEVER go behind his back and seek another guy out. I’ve spoken to him about it and he agrees he’s had an itch once or twice. So we’re discussing 3somes/swinging. Something a bit out there (for us) that we’re both comfortable with!
Communication! You cannot expect someone to fulfill your needs if you don’t tell them what those needs are.
I think I got off track!
I haven't cheated on my husband but if I did it would b because he has a very low sex drive. I have tried everything and the rejection used to hurt (I would cry) now it's like a numb feeling and I don't think that's any better.
I deserve to be desired and romanced and despite many times that I have communicated what I want and need and nothing has changed so i guess some women get fed up and look elsewhere to feel something physical because husbands just don't want to anymore
Once I found that everything came to light and he got help and things are now finally better (most of the time).
I completely understand how you feel. Just make sure you don't stay so long that you lose yourself or your self worth along the way. You are amazing and there are plenty of guys out there who'd love to bang you 😉
I read a news article on this the other day ‘why do seemingly happy couples have affairs’ and the basic answer is lust. Which apparently, according to the article is near impossible to resist but I disagree. It is easy enough to control yourself. Especially if you’re happy in your relationship. I also think the answer is sometimes not as simple as lust. Sometimes I think an affair is a symptom of something greater.
For me, it was about personal fulfillment. My husband sees me as a mother and a maid. He stopped treating me like a woman. We rarely have sex unless trying for more kids and my pleasure was deprioritized. It had been 8 years since I'd had an orgasm from him.
He was a narcissistic POS who has slowly cut off most of my friendships and family support. He tried to financially trap me and destroy my self worth.
Cheating on him was the push I needed to leave. No one knows what I did, but doing it changed my life for the better.
If you think your spouse may be cheating, you can contact [email protected]
He’s a real hacker and was very reliable in helping me spy on my cheating husband’s cell phone remotely.