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Having children is isolating if you don't do it at the same time as your "friends". Most people are arseholes. Be selective who you let in your life. Quality over quantity.
Me to. I don't even bother trying anymore.
Calling OP “needy” is judgemental, unkind and simply unnecessary. OP, please ignore these comments. I didn’t get a needy or desperate vibe from your post at all. The feeling I got is that you are sad and very much in need of some kindness (as are we all from time to time.)
OP loneliness is hard, and you certainly haven’t done anything to be in this position. Close friendships can be difficulty to find and even more difficult to keep sometimes. Please don’t be so tough on yourself, things will get better and easier in time.
Could you try meeting other parents through your children’s school? Or are there any hobbies you could pursue? Do you have a job? If not, could you get something even part time for the social interaction? I think you need to try and put yourself out there a bit more.
It’s a cliche, but a true one - this too shall pass. Keep trying OP and things will improve. Most importantly, take care and look after yourself.
I know this is an anonymous forum but it would be great if we had an identification number and were able to private message each other. So many lonely mums out there and it would be a great way to get some mums to meet up.
Before you can be someone’s friend you need be a friend to yourself.
See your doctor to see if you have depression or other mental illness.
Sounds like you come across as needy and text people constantly and want a text back ASAP and I have been in your position
I have been diagnosed with depression and ADHD and have couple of friends we don’t live in eachother pockets
I have hobbies that keep me happy and occupied
What to Do When You Are Too Needy. Being clingy means that overall you have a habit of calling friends too frequently, wanting to hang out all the time, being jealous when they spend time with others, or being insecure and in need of emotional reassurance constantly.
Limit your contact with them. This doesn’t mean you have to ignore them or anything like that. It just means that, if you’ve been contacting them a lot lately, following them around, or constantly commenting on their social media accounts, try to give it a rest. Let them find their way to you. If they really are your friend, they will get in touch with you.
When they do get in touch with you, don’t treat them as though they’ve done something wrong. Remind yourself that this is what you wanted, and be happy about it.
If you want to look at your friend’s social media account to see what they’re up to, that’s fine. However, realize that you may see pictures of them doing things with other people, and you may feel jealous. If you find yourself feeling jealous, avoid commenting something clingy on the photo. For example, don’t say, “It looks like you’re having a lot of fun without even inviting me!
I feel lonely too much of the time. I struggle to let people in as I don’t like feeling judged or vulnerable. It is a tough place to be. I’m hoping that going back to work will help with the social interaction...
I am the same, or probably worse, it's like I lack the skills to make friends completely
How old are you ?
How old are your kids ?
I would suggest you have friends aged 35 to 45
Yes, I did miss out on some of the fun years in a way but I wouldn’t change my children for the world.
Can you arrange with your husband two nights a week and 1/2 day sat, to do your own thing? This will give you time to do something you enjoy with other people and then make friends. I play in a mums soccer club and I belong to a Zumba club. These areas of my life I love doing and have made some wonderful friends.
I have been told mothers have a life and childless women don’t have a life and have free time to be at people’s beck and call