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16 year old want’s to sleep over at bf house - Would you allow this?

Answered 28 days ago

(I have already made my decision, but im interested in what others think as teen has informed ‘everyone is doing it’)

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Answers

ANSWER
28 days ago
No way

ANSWER
28 days ago
Times have changed. A few years ago I would’ve said hell no, but now I’m more along the lines of...if I do t provide a safe place for my kids to what they want, then they’ll go elsewhere to do what they want.

ANSWER
28 days ago
Hell no

ANSWER
29 days ago
No

ANSWER
1 month ago
No.

ANSWER
1 year ago
I was allowed to start staying at my high school boyfriend's house at 16 and he would come to our house as well. We had been together for 2 years at that point. Regardless of what you do and don't "let" them do, they are going to have sex. I'm glad that my parents educated and let me make my own decisions when it came to these things. I didn't lose my virginity until I was 17 and we weren't even at home at the time any way. Yup, cliche lost it in the backseat of his car 😂. I have 3 kids and, at this stage, I feel like 16 would be ok for them to start having girlfriend's and boyfriend's stay over. But then I plan on being the same with them as my parents were with me. We had open communication and there was never any judgement. We had a specific drawer in the bathroom that condoms were kept in and no questions asked, my parents would just replace them when they were empty. No teenage pregnancies either. I'm 26 and had my eldest at 22. And my siblings are 24, 22 and 20 and none of them have any kids. I always maintained I was going to have kids so my parents were shocked I lasted as long as I did lol. I had a friend who's mum refused to talk to her about puberty and sex and flat out "i just don't let my daughter go out and if she wants to have a boyfriend stay she can move out." Guess who used to sneak out and lie about where she was and ended up pregnant at 14. Then she wasn't even given a choice, her mum made her go through with an abortion. She fell pregnant again at 17, ran away from home and moved in with the boyfriend at the time, lost the baby to DHS and now has a long history of drugs and abusive relationships and refuses to have anything to do with her mum. I think I know which relationship I'd prefer to have with my kids.

REPLY
1 year ago
Thank you, your sharing is vey insightful and when my children are old enough, I will remember your words.

REPLY
1 year ago
No worries. I know my friend was an extreme of those circumstances and no it's not going to happen to every teenager who is told no to partner's sleeping over, but once you have seen it happen it definitely makes you think

ANSWER
1 year ago
Assuming they had been together a while, and I knew the parents I would say that's probably ok.

ANSWER
1 year ago
I’m probably more concerned about curfew and having my kid not staying out till all hours of the morning. So as long as I know they’re safe somewhere that’s ok. They’ll have sex anyway but there’s other risky stuff to be mindful of.

ANSWER
1 year ago
I have a boy and girl. They both had partners over at 16 as that is the age of consent. Came with some conditions. One was that they and their partner has to sit down with me and discuss birth control STDs.

ANSWER
1 year ago
Yes I would allow it

REPLY
1 year ago
They are going to have sex regardless of whether they have a sleep over or not.

REPLY
1 year ago
Exactly! I mean was your first time at a sleepover with your boyfriend? Or did you find a way to get it on anyway?

ANSWER
1 year ago
I was having a sexual relationship with my boyfriend for about 9 months and not allowed to have sleepovers. Then eventually after a discussion with my dad, who asked whether we were having sex, and took me to the gp to go on the pill, I was allowed my first sleepover. I had just turned 17.

ANSWER
1 year ago
With proper supervision, why not?

ANSWER
1 year ago
My son is 15 and I let him sleep over a girls house if he wants just not every weekend

ANSWER
1 year ago
If they are having sex, they will do it anywhere they can, public places, friends houses, and be risky about it which can lead to all sorts of trouble, not just pregnancy.
You could always say yes but you sleep separately. But still keeping an open dialogue with his parents as well.
My parents forbid me to date at 16, when I got a bf and was honest with them, they were so angry at me, they gave me ultimatums and made me break up with him... That's when dishonest, risky and rebellious behaviour occurs. So if I was you, I'd sit down, have an open converaation listing concerns etc, boundaries and go from there. Good luck

ANSWER
1 year ago
I've got boys. If they are in a stable relationship then yes I'd probably let them stay at a partners house or have the partner stay over (eldest is currently only 4). At that age my bf and I would stay at each other's house whenever my parents were away. We were officially allowed to stay over once I finished school (I was 17) and my parents asked that I go on the pill, which I did no worries.

ANSWER
1 year ago
Educate, open the line of communication and talk about responsibility. If you doing they'll sneak around and end up pregnant. Provide a secure and safe environment. My parents never allowed boys to sleep over. They coddled me and I rebelled. I didn't have any chance with them. Then I got myself into a situation

Speaking from experience as a 16-year-old who got pregnant.

ANSWER
1 year ago
No way. She's still a child.

ANSWER
1 year ago
I'd make sure there's birth control as they'll do it regardless of what you think

ANSWER
1 year ago
No