View other questions

Ask SAHM is a place where you can ask our staff & community a question safely & anonymously. Please read our disclaimer.

Thoughts on porn

Answered 30 days ago

It has never bothered me my husband watches porn on his phone but I just found out he was watching before we had sex not so long ago and now I don't know how to feel on the subject.
I'm hurt that he felt that was something that I wouldnt care about and that he never thought about how it would feel if I found out he was doing it.
Is it something I should be hurt by or just something to let go?
We have been together for 10 years and we have 2 young kids things aren't what they used to be and I get that and that's why watching it in general doesn't bother me.

Have an answer?

2000 characters left.

Answers

ANSWER
30 days ago
I feel like age & life experience might be a factor in some of the differing responses here. Porn is a big yawn to me now.

REPLY
29 days ago
It’s sad that we have become so complacent with it. I’ve had a porn addiction since I was 21 (when I first moved out of home and finally had privacy). I worry about our children who will be viewing it at a much younger age..

ANSWER
1 month ago
In general I think it screws men up. Especially when they're young they go into sex having unrealistic expectations. I feel like i had to reteach men how to have sex with with real women in relationships i've been in. Life isn't like a porno if you want me to actually get there... as they get older I think it makes them kind of lazy.

REPLY
1 month ago
Who are these men? I don’t think I’ve ever been with one who had unrealistic expectations of sex because of porn. All of the men I have been with, who have been into porn known it’s complete fantasy. Same as most women who realise romantic movies are also fantasy 🤷‍♀️

REPLY
1 month ago
Well I could name them & tell you where they live are you going to test them out & question them?

REPLY
1 month ago
^no thanks. I have no interest in knowing these kinds of men you seem to attract that live in fantasy land

REPLY
30 days ago
Nice bitchy attitude

ANSWER
1 month ago
Porn is the gateway it ruined my marriage. Lead to happy ending massage and escorts

REPLY
1 month ago
This is not the norm though. I’m sorry it worked out like this for you

REPLY
1 month ago
If you read studies conducted by world-leading universities especially in younger men. Then yes it is the norm as it becomes an addiction and an idea that can no longer be contained inside the porn world and becomes reality.

REPLY
1 month ago
Then most men have happy ending massages and see escorts if it’s the norm. What a load of bollocks

REPLY
1 month ago
Bullocks that's a very compelling argument

REPLY
1 month ago
Compelling if it fits your own opinion 🤷‍♀️

ANSWER
1 month ago
My husband and I both watch porn but he works away.
Why does it bother you? Is it because you are thinking he needs it to have sex with you?
If that's what it is, why don't you ask him why he needs it?
Maybe he needs a little spice in his life. Not saying you're boring but 10 years is a long time together, (hubby and I just tucked over 20 years) you both change and your needs change.
Talk about it with him. You might find you enjoy it together. Good luck.

ANSWER
1 month ago
It's awful. It contributes to the de-humanisation of females. Same as sex workers. You might say they choose to do it. But show me a woman doing either porn or sex work who has never been made to feel her worth is in what she provides men sexually, who has never been sexually abused, has a supportive family who have taught her that she matters as a person and has other job options and still choses to do it then fine.
It enforces men's entitlement over women and adds to the misogyny of this world.

REPLY
1 month ago
Agreed

ANSWER
1 month ago
It’s just porn 🤷🏼‍♀️ I watch it when I please myself why my husbands away. He’s the same. Why don’t you try watching it together?

REPLY
1 month ago
While**

ANSWER
1 month ago
I watched it twice today, pleasured myself to try get rid of my migraine. Probably will again before sex tonight to get in the mood after coming twice today,
Offer to watch it with him before sex if your up for it

ANSWER
1 month ago
You said it doesn’t bother you. But, does he know that sometimes it does ? He isn’t a mind reader. And you’re making assumptions as to why he’s watching it right before you had sex. Instead of getting upset by it, perhaps join in. Porn never really did anything for me until I started watching it with my husband before and during we had sex,
Just now and again. Hot!