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Is it ok for husband to stay out all night?

Answered 4 days ago

In 10yrs many times hubby has 'popped in for a quiet beer' at a friends aka nonstop drinking, not contacting to say he's staying out later, me waking 3am worrying, call and he says
I may as well spend the night then he either hasn't come home or gets in at 430 or 5am like last night(after saying he will be home by dinner)He always makes out im bad for getting upset about it and his friends think im crazy. He says its normal despite not knowing any other couples that do this. It makes me feel so disrespected i feel if ur married with a family u come home to yr own bed. U plan ahead for big nights uber there and back it takes over an hr to collect the car the next day. Give yr partner eta of time home. Weve had arguments about this n I've picked him up 3/4am which he says is my choice if i want him home. Sometimes he makes me wait till he finishes his beer stretches it out over an hr then cracks another!he then sleeps till 1pm and im up with kids.We r in our 40s not teens I'm sick of it!

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Answers

ANSWER
4 days ago
I had this happen last night and was searching to see if others have experienced this or if I am "just being crazy and controlling" like he says. I know my husband is faithful, however, he loves to have a good time and drink heavily with friends. Last night his family held an art show which he invited all his friends to - which they started drinking at 1pm. I joined the gathering from 4-7:00pm. When I left to bring my father home, he said he was staying for one more beer. Around 8:30, I started to freak out knowing he would either drink and drive or he'd end up sleeping there. His phone died and he end up crashing there. This is not the first time this incident has happened, once he gets going with his friends, he just doesn't want it to end. I guess I just thought when we decided to have a family this behavior would stop. To me, marriage is a partnership where you do things together. Yet, I was left at home alone, in my emotions of being angry which I tried to calm myself down all night because the high levels of adrenaline and cortisol are likely to be harmful to the baby? I just wish my feelings were respected and now just brushed aside as controlling or crazy. Anyway - you are def not alone. I just sent an email to request an appointment for a marriage therapist because I feel we need a safe mutual space to be able to discuss these things before the baby comes.

REPLY
4 days ago
Your feelings are all you mention.
No wonder he runs away sometimes!!

ANSWER
4 days ago
I feel your pain 💯💔

ANSWER
3 months ago
I don’t know what to say, I’ve been with my husband 41 years, and the last 8-10 years, he’s been part staying at another woman’s place, saying he’s doing nothing wrong. He’s just stopping her drinking and can’t leave her!,, I’m like I’m your wife , you can’t just go there all the time!, he even took her to see take that , and told me it was for work people only!,
He lied as it doesn’t just say workers,
I just feel so stupid , at not starting divorce proceedings those years ago! I still haven’t , I don’t think I can take the stress as not brilliant with health at the moment, oh yes he said I could take myself!,
I have cellulitis!,

REPLY
5 days ago
Your husband is an asshole and u probably deserve better.

ANSWER
16 days ago
okay my situation is the same except he doesnt answer my calls or text or puts me on block and then when im going off and snapping he flip it and says im belittling him and insecure

REPLY
7 days ago
Oh wow could we have the same husband? Haha I am dealing with this at the moment. He drinks and decides he wants to party even when we’ve made plans to come home

ANSWER
2 months ago
I’m so sorry - I’m in a similar situation. I have a newborn and my husband goes for a couple of beers... ends up back at 5am. I feel so hurt as I also have our other 4 more children the next day while he plays one of his sports. He has tried to pretend there is no issue and made comments like “you gonna be mardy all day” but I’m not taking it. I’m not pretending it didn’t happen .... just remember if we went out for a couple of drinks with a friend and cake in next morning ... we would probably be kicked out with accusations of cheating! You aren’t 18.... your middle aged with a family which you chose! Don’t walk over the women that love and support you and your family!!!

REPLY
2 months ago
I wonder if its a midlife crisis? I agree the women wd be accused of all sorts and expected to get up with the kids still. I think we married boys not men is what it comes down to. *hugs *

ANSWER
2 months ago
I've been with my partner over a year and every so many months goes off for week or 2 I've never let this happen before I have 2 children who arnt his but hes close to youngest he proposed 2 months ago and said everything will change to do it again last night went to meet old friends and never texted all night and didn't come home!!!

ANSWER
3 months ago
Yup it is. Best thing is to give him some money to help him. Praise him when he comes home

ANSWER
3 months ago
His behavior is awful. You don’t get married to end up going out drinking separately. I believe that ‘girls/guys nights out should stop once you’re married/living together. Why can’t you have nights out, but together as a couple? It doesn’t matter if you don’t drink, you can still spend time together and not have to drink. If he doesn’t want to include you in the time out at the bar, then he may be trying to flirt with other women. I believe that once you’re in a committed marriage/relationship, especially if you have kids together, the whole going out separately should end. You should be able to enjoy each other’s company and have a good time TOGETHER! There shouldn’t be any going to bars separately when you’re married.
Start saving money now and have enough to get you a place of your own because it doesn’t seem like he’ll stop his awful behavior. A married man shouldn’t be out til 4am while she sits at home. The only exception would be if he was actually at work.

ANSWER
3 years ago
My husband knows he's welcome to stay out as long as he wants. But I'm locking the door and going to bed at 11. If he's not home by then he can sleep outside. Tough luck babe I'm not your slave. He's come home late before and started carrying on out the front yelling and such, so I brought the kids into our bed (at the back of the house), pretended to be asleep and called the police anonymously about a noise complaint. When they arrived, one of them used their phone to call me and I pretended to wake up to let him in. They laughed at him. That was the last time he pulled that shit. Now he let's me know if he intends to stay out after 11 and asks if I can wait up for him or leave a key out.
As for the calls and texts while you're out. Mine does that too. I've started leaving the house with an almost flat phone. Like 20% and under of battery. I'm not using it but it's there if I need to make a call. The first time he calls I tell him that my phones going flat and if it's still got any battery left I'll text him when I'm on my way back 😈 I love the man but god damn, my alone time is precious, few and far between. I'll be fucked if I let him dictate it.

REPLY
3 years ago
Can't he just take a key with him?!

REPLY
3 years ago
Absolutely he can, but he never does because he's "scared of losing them". Wtf are pockets even for then?!

REPLY
2 years ago
Wowzer you run a right ship. 😂

REPLY
2 years ago
Tight*

REPLY
2 years ago
Not really. If he wants to stay out past then he can easily take his own keys. Or he can just say hey yeah gonna be out till super late is it cool if you wait up for me.
The next morning he's going to be hungover and need rest, which leaves me with 3 kids to keep out of his hair. I can't do that properly if I'm asleep on my feet.

REPLY
2 years ago
Omg this made me laugh so hard!! Love it

REPLY
4 months ago
Goddess!

ANSWER
1 year ago
I am 38 and my husband is 39 and we just split up because he did this to me 2 weeks ago. He got off from work at 4:30pm and text me with I'm gonna have a couple of beers with some guys from work. I was cool with that but then he didn't text me not called me after that and he also wouldn't answer my text messages nor calls. So me and my kids were worried about him thinking the worse. We thought he was dead somewhere. Then he came home at 4something the next morning and I was furious when he told me that he had went to his other stupid friends house and got so drunk that he ended up falling asleep inside his truck and that his phone died. I lost my temper and hit him. I wanted him to leave and go back to his stupid ass friends that I can't stand cus they're pieces of shit. I was so livid that I ended up calling the police. I know that was dumb of me but I was extremely furious. Now he came home a few days later and grabbed his clothes and moved in with one of his friends. Blaming me for everything. I do understand that I went over board with doing what I did. But he's the worst example for our children. And he hates me with a passion. 😭

REPLY
4 months ago
You hit him and he's a bad example for your children?? Ooookay. Does anyone else not appreciate the double standard here? If he hit her there would be hell to pay by all of their friends and family. The police would have been called and probably would have been arrested. But your basically saying I overreacted and i'm sorry now, why is he leaving? Oh ok cool.... i'm not surprised he left. It's an unhealthy relationship, best thing for both of you is for it to be over.

ANSWER
1 year ago
Hello I am going through this. It’s the worst it has ever been. I’ve even moved him into my daughters room.

REPLY
1 year ago
Meaning my daughter and I are sharing. My two sons don’t believe him anymore because he won’t come home when he says he will. He doesn’t want to divorce but will not be accountable for any time he spends away. He’s cheated in the past and called it an addiction and had therapy and counseling. Now I think he’s just wanting to run from parenting and being a husband. I’m through with feeling sorry for myself but I am very lonely and have so much I wish I was doing.

REPLY
4 months ago
Take the bull by the horns and get rid of him

ANSWER
9 months ago
im sorry your going through this but I am in the same boast in some way my husband married for 17 hears also goes out alot with co workers until 2 or 3 am and drinking. its a horrible feeling when it happens quite often and not just once in a blue moon.

ANSWER
10 months ago
I’m in the same boat
I’m sitting here at 3:17 am husband will not answer his phone
Hasn’t come home
I don’t know where he is

REPLY
10 months ago
Let him live!

ANSWER
2 years ago
My hubby put alcohol before us for 18 years, now I’ve left and he says we can make a future without alcohol!! Too late buddy 🤣

REPLY
10 months ago
The demon drink ruins so many families and relationships 🙈

ANSWER
10 months ago

ANSWER
1 year ago
I have the same problem, me and my boyfriend have been together for 16yrs and have 2 kids together. He goes to the pub every Thursday after work and I pick him up at about 8:30pm this night doesn't bother me. However ever Friday after work he goes straight from work to the pub at 3pm he doesn't tell me his going I guess it's because he does it ever week, he then ends up at the club and doesn't get home till 4:30am the next morning, Im then pissed off at him but some how its my fault all the time. He says he didnt realize he needed to ask permission to go out because his not a kid. Am I being unreasonable about him staying out once a week until 4:30am?

REPLY
1 year ago
Yes, give him a bloody break, he works hard to support your family.

REPLY
11 months ago
No you're not unreasonable at all. that's so not on

ANSWER
11 months ago
Very disrespectful he does not care how you feel

ANSWER
2 years ago
Stop picking him up and get rid of him if he wants to be with drinking friends more than his wife.

REPLY
1 year ago
I'm completely agree. Get rid of him because HE WON'T CHANGE and you will be very unhappy. Is that how you want to live your life? Full of anxiety
and always wondering when he'll do it to you again.

ANSWER
1 year ago
I agree, he’s not being respectful, you poor thing. Hugs.

ANSWER
1 year ago
My husband does this. Since we began dating. That was three years ago. Now I'm pregnant and sincerely don't want my daughter to see him behaving this way when she is older but I know she will. She will see how disappointed I am, every time. He never keeps his word. "See you in a bit," and it's 6AM, he still isn't here. I'm really just not looking forward to the future, only except to raise my daughter. That will be the light of my life. I don't want to be a harsh woman, and I want her to grow up with a father. Deep down in your heart I think you just hope that your children will respect you, because the example your husband is setting it's not respectful toward you. I just will pray that she doesn't imitate him.

ANSWER
2 years ago
Let him live. Sometimes it's good to be spontaneous. Just because you're in your 40s doesn't mean you need to be flogged out and routine. Give him a break. Just because you might have your boring expectation doesn't mean he can't get loose and have unexpected fun sometimes.

REPLY
2 years ago
As long as she is able to do likewise. And will he be picking her up after a boozy night with her friends..oh, and making him wait while she has a drink or two more?

REPLY
2 years ago
No wonder he does not want to go home. She must be bat shit crazy boring. She needs to get a life and stop sucking it out of him

REPLY
2 years ago
Op here.So I'm boring, he's spontaneous? Like it or not there is responsibilities in life! Ok let him be spontaneous-Whos left at home dealing with baby & kids,school run 730am next day. And collect him 5am- have to get the kids up for that & all wait while he has 'just one more' sometimes another. Have no sleep waiting for his bloody phone call worrying as he said he would be back for dinner. Be courteous enough to text and say I won't be back for dinner it will be a late one! Not that hard. Then he sleeps most of next day as hungover yet I'm expected to do everything on no sleep. Go get the car from other end of town after he finally gets up.Waste the annual leave day I had taken because some jobs had to be done urgently around the house before fencing getting done next day.If I'm boring, I'll wear that! but I call it being a grown up. I'm happy to say I haven't had to deal with this in ages I'm getting more assertive & clearer with expected communications. Still quite boring tho lol

REPLY
2 years ago
^he does it because you let him.
You are an enabler.

REPLY
2 years ago
You must be getting something out of it if you keep allowing it.

REPLY
2 years ago
Yeah to above 2 commenters pretty sure I just wrote I haven't had to deal with this shit in a long time. This was a year ago lol! Not enabling. Not getting something out of it. And that's such a bullshit comment anyway obviously not the most educated :-\ And it's not happening anymore, again, we are taking about a year ago and not now.

ANSWER
2 years ago
My husband did the same thing to me when the kids were much younger , so after a few years I decided that I was done being a good wife and cheated on him ! And you know what , now he wonders who’s calling me or texting me , who I’m going out to meet up with , when you turn the tables on these bastards they don’t like it not one bit ! :)

REPLY
2 years ago
Sounds like healthy advice

ANSWER
3 years ago
No way in hell would I put up with that bullshit.. amd that's what it is, total bullshit. What a disrespectful asshole. I am angry FOR you!

REPLY
2 years ago
So funny cus im having the same problem with my boyfriend not only he didn come home he want and got another line added to his account whats that about ....

REPLY
2 years ago
Honey get rid of him now because I’m married to one of 20 years an your life will be so miserable

ANSWER
2 years ago
This has been my life for the past 1.5 yrs. on his days off he will go out with his work mates and not come home until 5am and me knowing that he is at some pub or club pissing money down the drain (literally). He spends almost 100hrs a week with his work mates - we are both shift workers and only get 3 days a fortnight together but chooses to spend his free time with them, is hung over the next day and always cancels plans. I can’t teme the last time we went out for dinner. he keeps doing it even though he knows how much it stresses me out and hurts me. The fact that disturbs me more is that he ghosts me when he is out, he doesn’t acknowledge my few texts (I don’t bombard him) or even phone calls. I am a step parent to his son and he leaves me at home to look after him. He calls me crazy cooked psycho dog and bitch and says I’m being difficult for getting so upset. I just want time with him ;(. He doesn’t want to talk about it when I pursue the subject and he gets mean. He also gets random Snapchat’s at all hours from one of his female workmates. The worst was when he didn’t come home from night shift, after 10 hours I went and found him at the pub Still In his work clothes drinking alone with another woman. They were sitting very close to each other, and he was looking at her like he had his dick in his hand. When he saw me standing there.. the look on his face.. I will never forget it. Like oh shit then hate ;( I was so mortified and hurt my face was burning and my heart ached I thought I was having a heart attack. I rushed out and drove home. He didn’t come home for another hour. When he did I lost my shit and screeched at him and threw his clothes out the front and wouldn’t let him in. I didn’t want any explainations as I just discovered that I loved him more than he loved me. Again I was the psycho. I was the bitch. I was the cooked one. This has resulted in very difficult breakup. He wouldn’t even talk about it and just turned the tables on me like it was all my fault when all I’d do is worship the ground he walked on. I would do early starts so I could get home earlier from a 12.5 hour shift just so could see him and hug him and tell him that I loved him so much - this is how he has repaid me. I have lost all my confidence and I have lost faith in the male species. The hurt I feel is so profound. Worse still because he was treating me like shit, his son was doing the same to me. He only just finally moved out. I packed his stuff for him because he wouldn’t and he would yell at me that I was not normal and crazy. I even helped him move his shit to the new place and he still hurls insults at me and doesn’t acknowledge his behaviour for the last 18 months has been so disrespectful- how can I test him when he acts like that. But I still care about him so maybe I am crazy. I’m even seeing a psychologist because he’s made me think that maybe I am?

REPLY
2 years ago
Man: *acts like a piece of shit, repeatedly*

Woman: hey stop doing that it's bullshit

Man: yOu'Re FuCkEd/cRaZy/mIsTaKeN

Woman: oh you're probably right.


Baby girl, just 👏 because 👏 you👏 care👏 about👏 someone👏 doesn't👏 mean👏 you👏 should👏 be👏 with👏 them(!!!) and put up with their shit. You are not crazy because you care about his welfare. Even if you love him, that doesn't make YOU the crazy one. What kind of psycho acts like that while he's in a relationship? What kinda raggedy-ass shady deadbeat father basically abandons his spawn to go re live his single days? What kind of bottom feeding, grubby, lowlife motherfucker tries to blame their own bullshit on their loving partner? A big fat sack of shit. That's who does those things. It'll hurt, but baby, you gotta run far and fast from this herpe of a human. He's a fucking love sore and you deserve better. You're only crazy if you stay with him. HE 👏 IS 👏 TRASH 🙌🙌

move on to the next one, that ones broken.

REPLY
2 years ago
Wow I hope after writing that you can read what you’ve written and take a moment to let it sink in.
Nothing crazy about you for putting up with someone treating you like a piece of shit. You were just crazy (blind with love?) to stay.
Thank god you’re out of that relationship now. Move on and find someone that actually treats you with respect. Goodluck

REPLY
2 years ago
I'm sorry hon ur going thru this but geez was glad to read u broke up with him. What he's doing is projecting all the blame on u and messing with your head. You deserve soooo much more. He was disrespectful and took advantage obviously trying to have the best of both worlds. Don't look back now. The counselling is a good idea not because yr crazy but to help u process and realign to see things clearly not how he tried to paint them and to move on stronger so u never put up with this shit again.

ANSWER
2 years ago
I am.going through the same thjng..🙄 7am this.morning he measages me can i come home when i wake well spend the day together. But thats a lie he wakes up.and starts workjng again hell just let me join him..i feel so.physically and mentally sick with this behaviour i really hope i ajnt i this position still in my 40s. My partners 29 and does this shit every other day. I dnt think i can be in this for much longer its depressing

ANSWER
2 years ago
My husband and I have been married 25 years and he recently started doing this and i hate it but he tells me he is not doing anything wrong he said I shouldn’t try to pick his friends for him he say like or not they are my friends one guy is a 25 year old dope dealer he says as long as the guy don’t do anything to him he is fine with it and he told me i need to find some friends and go out and have fun

REPLY
2 years ago
Do just that. Find some friends and go have fun and see how he likes it. Start doing your hair and nails also and dress nice while doing so. If you don't already, also start going to the gym.

ANSWER
2 years ago
No, Never okay

ANSWER
2 years ago
Nope. Wouldn’t be ok for my husband. He would be divorced fairly quickly


ANSWER
2 years ago
My husband is doing this to me? I don’t know what to do

ANSWER
3 years ago
I also really like the idea of doing it to him as i never have. And each time too.. When i have an odd night out to have dinner with girlfriends then chat after he will msg me a lot and tells me its getting late, he misses me, hes waiting up and wants to sleep, then, are u even coming home? Come on honey come home now etc and i go home to appease him! Not even nights out if i visit a girlfriend for coffee in the day he does it or if im shopping!or at a playdate with my toddler he tells me off for staying too long and messing with my baby's day sleep! It makes me anxious. I think a taste of his own medicine will maybe make him realise

REPLY
3 years ago
Fuck that sound like its cautioning on the side of dv.
Reply to the first text that it’s extremely rude of you to be on your phone while catching up with someone. It is!!!
Tell him not to wait up and switch your phone on silent.

REPLY
2 years ago
Turn your phone off when you go out.

REPLY
2 years ago
He is a controlling arsehole
That’s emotional abuse

ANSWER
3 years ago
Do it to him a few times. See if he thinks thats 'normal'

REPLY
2 years ago
I’ve tried this. It’ll only give them more leeway.

ANSWER
2 years ago
The guy is a disrespectful piece of shit. The fact you’ve gone to pick him up and he makes you wait while he finishes his beer and then sometimes even starts another shows he couldn’t give a damn about anyone but himself. I know you married him, but I think you’d be better off separating. It’s obvious he doesn’t value your relationship or the responsibilities of being a father.

ANSWER
2 years ago
A husband and a wife are supposed to show respect in the marriage.

ANSWER
2 years ago
If I did this my husband would flip his shit, so, no I don’t think it is acceptable behaviour at all. Your husband sounds like one of those douchey blokes who think “the boys” are more important and treats his wife and kids like they are just a hassle. I bet he was like that when you married him and you thought he would change. But blokes like that never change, that’s why you don’t marry them. Ladies, marry a bloke that already see you/ family as number 1, not some bloke who you think will change if you have kids. Kids will change a woman, but very rarely a man.

ANSWER
2 years ago
My sons father did that to me once. That's why he's now my ex

REPLY
2 years ago
Yes I would be the same. Now that we are married I would never let this happen to me. I can’t believe what I’m reading. I could never forgive him.

ANSWER
2 years ago
I don’t see the issue. At all. My husband does this from time to time when he goes out. Why does there have to be a time limit on going out for drinks with friends? Or going out at all? As long as you communicate. I don’t see how staying out late, being social with your friends, having fun is disrespectful. If we have plans the day after my husband has gone out drinking those plans go ahead, regardless of how tired or hung over he is. Take some panadol, have a feed and get on with it. If he stayed in bed all day, blowing off our plans because of it THAT would be disrespectful to me. If I go out, I expect the same freedom and I expect to be held to my word the next day too. Communication and clear expectations. 👍🏻

REPLY
2 years ago
The issues were that hubby didn't communicate I wouldn't hear from him to say he's staying out later or all night and would be at home worrying about what's happened. Ie he DIDN'T communicate and that the next day is a complete write off. In my original post I had even taken a days leave to get work done and he wasted it

REPLY
2 years ago
Also, op said he had said he’d be home for dinner and then doesn’t even text so she’s up all night worrying, how is that ok? Who said it wasn’t ok to have fun drinking all night with friends, like you said, communication is the key and it’s a lack of respect to say to your wife you’ll be home for dinner so she cooks and is waiting on you all night. And then to blow plans off and stay in bed the next day..
I’d be pissed too 😤

REPLY
2 years ago
Op of this comment. Ooooooh sorry didn’t mean to get anyone’s back up! Expecting him home and then him not following through, definitely poor form! Next day being a write off, poor form! Completely agree there. If those things are communicated and agreed upon then I don’t see the issue. I just find a lot of women get so pissy about their man/husband going out and having a big one with the boys and being all level 10 psycho about it which I think is crap. That’s all!

ANSWER
2 years ago
My husband started doing this almost 2 years ago. He says he’s at his cousins house, which is a girl. On several occasions I just popped up there and he was there fixing something. Meanwhile l, I can’t get him to fix anything around our house. He thinks this is completely normal to stay out all night. He says that he don’t complain when I go places during the day. I go to the grocery store, thrift store, or to work. He doesn’t work either. He thinks I’m crazy and this behavior is ok as long as he’s not cheating. I feel your pain.

REPLY
2 years ago
Your husband sounds like an Arse if he doesn’t work all day and over at other people’s houses fixing their shit and not your own at your own home.

ANSWER
3 years ago
Thanks ladies. I had such a bad sleep last night waiting for him and wondering if he will even come home. 5am to me is pretty much the next day anyway it was light ten mins later! He's hard to argue with as he turns everything around to be my fault or gets angry he is not good at communicating I'm going to try talking to him though. I'm also upset because he knows I wouldn't like it but does it anyway its hurtful. And the biggest thing is I took an annual leave day today for us to do some much needed work on the house and garden today as we are getting a pup this week and fences going in we have to clear the area first and some organising tasks and its lunchtime now hes still fast asleep! I'm thinking of telling him to catch an uber to get the car and also of going out tonight. I dont really have anywhere to go but could actually go to the gym browse kmart take myself for dinner and see a movie then come home at midnight its all the things i enjoy!

REPLY
3 years ago
Do all of that. Find a 24 hr Kmart lol

REPLY
2 years ago
Book into a motel with a spa and movie channel.

REPLY
2 years ago
Sometimes I just buy a burger and sit at the beach in my car just so I can avoid going home when I'm expected to, so my husband could go out drinking. Never asks if I want to make plans with him, and when we do they get sabotaged by him going out drinking. Ass hat

ANSWER
2 years ago
Only if he is in the watch house and can not physically come home!

ANSWER
3 years ago
My husband leaves for a drink and comes back 4 days later, no message, no call... I talked to him about but he just doesn’t care. I am so used to it I don’t even care anymore. All love and respect is dead. I can’t leave as I have no family, no job, he controls the money. I get a set amount each month. So at this stage myself and the kids do our own thing.

REPLY
3 years ago
You can leave! There are so many services around to help women in your position, and centrelink can process your application for the single parenting payment quickly under these circumstances as well. He sounds like an asshole, and financial control like this could be classed as financial abuse - a type of DV! Try reaching out to local women's shelters or google support services in your area like Red Cross, Salvos, Centacare etc!! Life is too short to stay in a marriage like this!!

REPLY
2 years ago
I posted this 9 months ago, and how things have changed! I did what the above poster suggested and I moved out with my kids! I work as a domestic cleaner while I am studying. I am happier knowing I am strong and don’t have to settle for someone who does not respect me!

REPLY
2 years ago
^ great update!

ANSWER
2 years ago
My husband does the same thing he doesn’t even call me t say where he is . Idk I just give him the silent treatment. Then I go treat myself shopping do my hair.

ANSWER
3 years ago
I'm sorry but ur husband is an asshole

ANSWER
3 years ago
I would be pissed too. I’m an anxious person and have always asked that my husband text me during the night. Not telling me what he is doing as such but just touching base so I know all is ok. He messages me when he is leaving the event so I know he is on his way home.
But this all came from me “training” him as we used to fight a lot when he used to go out and come home at all hours when I was at home stressing. We have kids now too so he has changed a bit. But some of his friends think it’s ok to go out all night long and not let their partners know so guessing it’s a guy thing.
I’d def pay him back and make sure you do exactly what he does to you and if he cracks it, say to him well that’s what you do on a regular basis and I’m meant to be ok with it. If he doesn’t realize After that then he is just a selfish dick head. Good luck

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3 years ago
Oh i would be pissed to i agree start doing it to him to. My husband used to do it so i started organising to take the kids out to do something fun the next day when he really needed to sleep once the kids started asking him why he never came out with us and slept all day he stopped staying out all night and doesn't go out very often now and prioritizes family over drinking

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3 years ago
How horrible and you're right to feel disrespected. as petty as it feels I say you go out and do the same to him, prearrange with friends to stay over but don't tell him. Every tune he does it you do it until he starts breaking out in a sweat of concern to what time you'll be back. Try infirm your kids that you're not sure what time sk they are not too upset.

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3 years ago
Agree with this. Make sure you stay in bed until 1 pm so he has to deal with the kids.

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3 years ago
I don't care if my partner stays out at a mates house all night. As long as I know beforehand and it isn't all the time.

I think its fine if he wants to stay out all night but its rude to not be considerate of you or your feelings. If its an all the time thing id be upset too. I wouldn't appreciate his friends thinking you're crazy either, I would hope that he says something to them about that. Its not fair on you or your kids either.

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3 years ago
Oh I hear ya loud and clear. My hubby says it doesn't bother him if I go out and don't contact him so why should he contact me. Um because I'm home by 10pm and I drive. This was last year. We actually separated over it as one time he didn't come home till lunch time the next day I had no idea where he was. We're back together now and much better. Good luck xx