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Mums without a drivers license

Answered 3 days ago

So i don't have a drivers license and i have no plans to get one, Everyone teases me about it and i get the same old questions " wont your kids miss out" and " how do you get around" are there any other mums out there that don't have it?

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ANSWER
3 days ago
If you choose not to drive, fine.
But don’t be constantly calling people for lifts or asking them to drive your kids to school because it’s all too hard for you to do it, you know because you never bothered to get your license

ANSWER
7 days ago
Yes I’m in the same boat more fear of falling and going to public places I pray my husband won’t leave me I’m definitely have irrational fears of everything literally

REPLY
7 days ago
Sad you’re dependent on hubby

ANSWER
5 years ago
I think it is totally irresponsible

REPLY
5 years ago
Why? In a emergency, you would call for help, anyway.

REPLY
5 years ago
😂 your right, not contributing to the pollution of this planet IS irresponsible!
How could they do such a thing?? -note sarcasm-
As above said, if there is an "emergency" you would call an emergency service, rendering your lack of car irrelevent.

REPLY
26 days ago
On the contrary, those who don't drive because they recognize that they are too nervous to do so are being very responsible.

REPLY
26 days ago
You’re not exactly saving the planet by having kids lol

ANSWER
2 months ago
My mum never got her licence. Catching the bus to school or into town or shopping centre was easy. But we missed out on sports because it meant two or three buses to get to the area. And often games day was too early for a bus ride there. We missed out on play dates and birthday parties because buses weren’t on the direct routes. Parents wouldn’t offer to drive me or my siblings because mum couldn’t return the favour. I didn’t mind catching buses and trains but I did hate that my destinations were limited. But, I understood my mum was just too scared to drive, she couldn’t even push a shopping trolley in the right direction ffs ! I learnt to deal with it but got my drivers licence as soon as I turned 17. Mum loved it, I had to drive her everywhere.

REPLY
26 days ago
My father never learned either, was way too nervous. My mother drove him to and from work every day (he worked for himself so sometimes an hour or more round trip) and worked herself. I think it's good that people don't drive when they recognize they shouldn't.

ANSWER
2 months ago
Some people just can't get their licence.
I have struggled with getting someone to teach me, getting in to do the test and have someone to watch my kids, having a car, having the money and convincing myself I'm not a piece of crap. I have asked hubby to help but he dosent want me to get them dispite us having 3 kids and he works all day 6 days a week.
I want my licence so badly but it's just a shit show trying yo to organise everything....I'm trying
Judge away, cause we know you do.

REPLY
1 month ago
Ull get there. Chin up.

REPLY
26 days ago
While you wait for the opportunity, study the theory part, do the mock test etc so you have that knowledge and I hope if you mention it, someone offers to help you out.

ANSWER
1 month ago
I didn't get mine until my eldest was 6yrs old. With 1 kid it was easy to use public transport but when I had my 2nd child it became much harder. Hubby taught me to drive. I don't think it is unusual to not drive, I have a few friends who have kids and don't drive.

REPLY
26 days ago
Exactly the same here. It was a 35 degree day, walking home from the bus uphill with two children and I made the decision to face my fears!

ANSWER
1 month ago
I don’t have mine and I’m going to be a mum soon. A bit anxious about it as I’m worried about how I’ll have the time or energy to try and get it once the kids here, but also the thought of doing the test during pregnancy is not appealing.
I’ve managed fine without myself but I keep getting comments from people about being pregnant without my licence. It’s depressing, especially from colleagues.

REPLY
26 days ago
Don't worry about it yet. I was the same, didn't have the mental energy to learn while pregnant. However, once the children get to school age it became difficult managing on public transport so I learned then. In the meantime, you will have lots of lovely adventures and walks with your little one while they are small and appreciate the time together. When the time comes you just have to jump in and do it!

ANSWER
5 years ago
One of the hardest things about not having a licence is the shame put onto you about it. People get so self righteous because they can drive. Well hold the fucking phone judgemental ones. There are so many benefits to not having a licence.
We can walk everywhere and enjoy nature
We are staying active together as a family
The price of fuel means nothing to me, unless it impacts buses
We can maintain an inner smugness because our walking is environmentally friendly
I have met so many great people while walking
We've stumbled across some hidden gems of our suburb we'd have missed out on otherwise
I don't have to pay a gym membership for fitness.

REPLY
28 days ago
I walk every day, and hour in the morning and an hour at night. Every day. But I still have a license and I drive, because it’s sensible and convenient and if my kids are I’ll or injured, I can help them get medical attention. Absurd not to have a license in this day and age.

ANSWER
5 years ago
My SIL refuses to get hers (she is 30) but refuses ro use public transport or even walk anywhere unless she is desperate for something. She is always calling the extended family asking for lifts for her kids to be taken to school/sport etc (albeit the school is 2 streets away, she still won't walk). I used to take her kids to shool when I was taking mine but due to Hubby getting a new job, we moved and she still carries on about how rude and selfish we are to have moved away and left her without transport.

REPLY
28 days ago
My SIL is the same. 31 doesn’t drive, has no interest, won’t walk anywhere, won’t catch a bus and has moved home. He dad drives her to the gym in the morning, collects her and takes her home, she has a shower and then he drives her to work, the does the same in the evening. She is CONSTANTLY wanting lifts everywhere. Complete flog if you ask me. Wonders why she can’t find a decent man.....ummm maybe because they don’t want an additional part time job driving you EVERYWHERE you want to be. It’d be enough to put me off that’s for sure. I don’t offer lifts anymore, it’s beyond a joke, it’s fair dinkum lazy.

ANSWER
28 days ago
I dont drive

ANSWER
28 days ago
This is ridiculous. Unless there’s a medical reason why you shouldn’t, all parents should have a license. Even if you don’t want or choose to have a car, you should be able to drive if a situation required it. What if your child NEEDS you to drive, to help them, to get medical attention. Completely ridiculous not to be on top of it. And for everyone making excuses, pull your heads in and get it done. Driving is a basic skill.
People won’t like this but it’s my opinion and whilst I’m pretty flexible with a lot of things, I don’t see wriggle room with this. It’s a basic necessity. And for those of you who are convincing yourselves your kids won’t miss out, they will, 100%.

ANSWER
1 month ago
I'm 39 with a 9yr and 14yr old. Never ever had my license. We love the bus and in the warmer mths go on foot too. We smell flowers suss out cool houses find feathers etc. Ive got the same questions b4 too. Do whats best for u 💯🐞

ANSWER
5 years ago

Public transport sucks. There is always some person who stinks and people asking for money or smokes even if you don't smoke. Disgusting.

REPLY
5 years ago
Maybe it's just your attitude that stinks? Public transport is a perfectly fine way to get around, unless you think your above everybody else that is.

REPLY
5 years ago
No people stink when they are sitting right next to you in a small space with no deodorant or some shit cheap perfume on 😷 public transport stinks all the time because people are pigs

REPLY
5 years ago
That's funny because I live in Sydney and take public transport everyday, and almost never in my time have I ever had a problem with anybody like that. Yet you, who apparently deems it "disgusting" so I can only assume would rarely use it apparently have the same horrible experience EVERY time! Isn't that amazing, what are the odds!!!

As I said, I think it's more your perception of public transport rather then actual reality.

REPLY
2 months ago
It’s actually the truth. Second hand smoke and body odour in summer on public transport. Druggies congregating up the back listening to filthy music loud enough the whole bus can hear. Overcrowding.
I’ve had to ring the police because a couple do off their face fell asleep with their baby laying across the seat nearly fell off the chair. Seriously in and out of being with us. Disgusting!

ANSWER
2 months ago
I have my licence but there was a period I didn’t have a car. Made getting the kids to and from their after school activities or early morning weekend stuff a bit difficult... but I’m not near a train station and the bus here only runs once an hour.
So the kids miss out if you can’t be bothered with all the public transport plus it takes 3 times as long to get anywhere or do anything. I don’t know why people don’t put in the effort unless it’s a medical issue in which case you’d get half price taxis I guess.
Just is a whole lot of unnecessary hassle if you ask me. Much prefer a car

ANSWER
5 years ago
Yes your children will miss out but they won't know it. Not having a license means that they can't do any activities which are either too far to walk or there is no public transport to. Yes you can arrange lifts but as a parent who has done more than her fair share of driving other people's kids around it does get old fast. If my daughter wants her best friend to stay I have to drive to pick her up and then drive her home. Other parents drive their children to and from our house and I do the same when my children sleep over. It is common courtesy. It also allows me to make sure the other house is safe.

Having a license gives you freedom. You don't have to rely on anyone. If your kids get sick or injured you can take them to the doctors without worrying when the taxi is going to arrive. You can go to far off places when you want to not when the bus, tram, or train timetable says you can.

My sister in law doesn't have hers. Her poor husband has to drive everywhere they go. He doesn't get to drink but she sure puts them away. He has confided to his brother that he hates the fact that she makes up excuses why she wont' get it. I don't think it is too much to ask that he be able to have a few drinks with friends while out and his wife drive home for once. They live miles out of town so a taxi is out of the question. My husband and I take it in turns to the designated driver when we go out.

Even though I've had my license for over 25 years I still walk every day. To the shops, doctor's, club, pub and even the bus stop.

ANSWER
5 years ago
I had a friend who didn't have a licence for years. She couldn't do the same with her kids as I could with mine. I don't tease people about it but I do find anyone over 21 with out a licence strange.

REPLY
5 years ago
I'm like your friend. I have a bff with kids the same age as mine, we work together to set up activities for our kids, then she does carpool to gymnastics/swim/sport/language/muic/ and I stay with the rest of our kids and make a double batch of dinner. My kids do just as much as theor friends.

REPLY
5 years ago
I am 32 without a license. I am absolutely comfortable walking, bussing, or cabbing to where I need to go, and while I don't have kids of my own yet, I am a babysitter/day care worker and former nanny and respite provider, who has had frequent experience with children on public transport, and they never missed out on anything. :-)

My reasons for not having one include environmental factors, finances, initial failures, and just general disinterest (and occasional nervousness as I am a bad judge of distance).

ANSWER
5 years ago
I lived in a small country town, nearest shop was half an hour away, no doctors, no public transport, a license was a necessity. Now we live in the city and I prefer public transport.

ANSWER
5 years ago
Having a driver's license is not the be all and end all of everything
Its convenient sometimes but nothing beats a bus or train ride instead of having to drive all the time (i don't have a partner)
Times when I have not had my licence or a car I never complained about it. I used to just walk or bus it.
Either way i just like to be independent.

ANSWER
5 years ago
I don't have mine. I can't concentrate enough on the road so I'm too high risk. Here's a revaluation... I WALK. I know, shocking right? It's unbelievable the amount of people who always say shit like "oh you can't get by without it." And "how do you get around?" When you live in a small town, that takes max 30 minutes to walk from one side to the other, you really don't need one. I had a friend on fb the other day all panicking because she needed formula for her daughter but her husband had the car so there was no possible way for her to get down town and she needed someone to give her a lift. It takes 15 minutes to walk from her place to the shop. Take the bottle full of water with you and put the formula in it down town. The stupidity of some people and reliance on transportation is ridiculous sometimes.

REPLY
5 years ago
I agree I use my bike to get most everywhere.. people always say "o wow" when they see me with a helmet and "oh your amazing I could never do that. Truth is after a month of riding everywhere it's not even excercise any more as its so easy . The kids love it more than the car and so do I .

ANSWER
5 years ago
I have brought up 3 children and at times not having a license was annoying especially when we lived out in the bush kms from anywhere, The boys have missed out on doing things but then we have had fun with walking or riding our bikes. My own family was always pushing me to get my license and I did try but my nerves got the better of me. Plus it would had meant a 2nd car if i did. My boys attended sports practice, i was able to do shopping. Now i am unable to drive due to medical problems so my boys drive me around. There were times it would had being handy but we managed and my boys have grown up ok. Yes i can drive on roads in an auto with hardly any traffic , it is safer for others I do not.
I

ANSWER
5 years ago
How do you get around though?

REPLY
5 years ago
We've covered this in other replies. Walking, buses, trains, taxis, bike, tram.

ANSWER
5 years ago
Has everyone never heard of public transport....

REPLY
5 years ago
Not everywhere has public transport.

REPLY
5 years ago
There isn't any here where I am

REPLY
5 years ago
Most of the time people who choose not to have a license do so because they DO have public transport available (or it's easy to walk).

ANSWER
5 years ago
I'm 34 have 2 boys and never had a licence either. We walk lots and we love it. I get more exercise than most in the cold months we taxi and bus it. We live a full normal life, some people are stupid assuming my kids miss out. On what exactly? The birds chirping and the smell of roses in full bloom or the attention to detail in our uninterrupted life chatter? We love our life xxx

ANSWER
5 years ago
My mum didn't but we lived in the uk in a large ish city and everything could be walked or bussed to. I drive, but we have recently moved to a suburb where we can wak to school, shops, library etc, so looking forward to the cooler weather!

ANSWER
5 years ago
omg i am not the only one! I do get worried sometimes as most mums do drop offs to sports,music lessons, friends houses, etc while my is stuck with me unless its easy to get to via public transport or walking. I have my Ls but too scared to drive..i am now pregnant with 2nd child and not sure when to start getting behind the wheel for more lessons! Luckily i dont live too far from public transport or city so can easily walk it if I needed to which is not too bad.

ANSWER
5 years ago
I didn't get my license until my eldest was a few months old, with DH's work hours I found Drs appointments to be the hardest thing, I used to have to get my Mum or Granny to come just so I could drive to my appointments.

ANSWER
5 years ago
I don't have mine. My kids still go to birthday parties, swimming lessons and after school activities. We walk most of the time.

ANSWER
5 years ago
Growing up my mother never drove, she still doesn't. She likes everyone to do it for her. As a kid I missed out on so much.... Even now she will fob it off and say us kids never liked to do anything. I didn't or she didn't?? I never went to any after school activity and there was hardly any food in the cupboards. We had to wait for dad to get home from work and do everything she should have done during the day. And she has no problems with her eyes. She has an addiction.

REPLY
5 years ago
Same here it was not great

ANSWER
5 years ago
Growing up, my mum never had one and I don't feel we missed out on anything. We lived near a major city so there was a lot of available public transport and we could easily walk to our school, local shops and nearby parks. And longer trips would have been done all as a family on the weekends with dad anyway (dad drove). I think it was a lot harder on mum when we moved to a smaller town and the public transport wasn't so readily available. I think that took a toll on her being so house-bound but I was too young to really notice at the time.

I got my licence when I could, almost to get it over and done with but then never really drove for ages as I didn't need to. Preferred to use public transport and walk wherever I could. I didn't have a car with two small children either and we either walked everywhere with them or again, used a lot of public transport. It helped that we lived so close to the train station so getting into town was really easy and the kids loved being on the trains.

Now we've moved to a much smaller town without reliable public transport and I'm SO glad I had my licence to fall back on. I couldn't be without my car now. My mum however, still lives near a major city and while she appreciates lifts to places she never expects it and is quite happy to get around on foot or public transport including travelling for a couple of hours by train to see family members.

I think kids benefit from using public transport. Mine love choosing their seats and sitting up and looking out the windows. Walking also means you go at a much slower pace which can be tricky when you're in a rush but when walking home from something and you have more time, it's really lovely stopping to smell the flowers, or watch construction works, or to have the time and space to talk about everything happening around you when you're not having to concentrate on the road. As much as I love our car now, I miss those walks. :)

ANSWER
5 years ago
I don't have one either ☺ if you could see how I see you'd understand. I could pass the test I'm sure. But it strains my eyes when I drive so I'd prefer to just be a passenger. My husband drives. And we live in a capital city so our public transportation is good. My kids do miss out. I admit that. But I'd rather they miss out on some things, and live to see another day. Than for me to get behind the wheel and have an accident killing us all or someone else. I think it's the responsible thing to not have one for me.
I know life would be infinitely easier if I just got a licence. But that's a very big risk to take. Maybe if I keep wearing my glasses and practicing my driving (I do have my Ls), one day things will be different. Just maybe.

REPLY
5 years ago
Anxiety medication helped me I had similar reasons to you till one day I realised I was scared bam next minute I could do it I get nervous on long trips bad traffic ect but at lest I can go to Coles or anywhere in my suburb

REPLY
5 years ago
Good on you for identifying what the problem was and getting help ☺
My problem is more vision related though. Have you ever heard of stereo blindness? It's not that uncommon really, and a lot of people who have it go on to drive just fine. But mine is coupled with already poor vision so it's a bit shit really.
When I do drive I have to be extra careful with judging distances. So it doesn't take long before my eyes start straining and I have to pull over so someone else can drive. They're straining now just looking at the screen lol

REPLY
5 years ago
Good for you! Its hard to admit our limitations. My brother shouldn't drive and does. It's not a matter of if, but when he will kill someone. I understand being unable to drive is a hindrance, but it's not that hard to grab a ride, catch a cab, or take a bus/train if needed.

ANSWER
5 years ago
I couldn't imagine not having my drivers license. My husband lost his for 6 months and it was the biggest pain in the ass ever. We live in a big city and it takes at least 30min drive to get anywhere and public transport is crap here

ANSWER
5 years ago
I didn't have on for a very long time. I could walk to everything so it wasn't needed. Playgrounds, shops, and friends were all within my lil bubble. Now I have to have it because we live in a rural area.

ANSWER
5 years ago
I didn't have one till my kid was 2. Honestly we did miss out now I have it we do swimming lessons and visit interesting places without relying on dad all the time.

ANSWER
5 years ago
How do you get them around? Visit Freinds? Shopping? Birthday parties? I would not be able to live without my driver's license.

REPLY
5 years ago
It's remarkable how resourceful you can be without a licence. Shopping you can do online and have delivered, or walk home with it. Friends can visit you or meet up somewhere you can all get. Birthday parties, well there are taxis or buses

ANSWER
5 years ago
I have one but I mainly take my bike every where

ANSWER
5 years ago
How do you get them around?

ANSWER
5 years ago
Why wont you get it?