Maternal Instinct

Most mothers do ‘ave ’em. That moment when you are driving with your child in the passenger seat and your arm instinctively covers them when you need to slam on the brakes or a car cuts in front of you. Or when you wake up merely seconds before they call your name in the middle of the night, usually summoning you for some ridiculously unnecessary reason. Maternal  Instinct is defined as an inborn tendency to want to protect and nurture one’s offspring and almost all mothers, both human and animal, display this inclination once they have children. Maternal instinct can be described as a special bond between mother and child, and is believed to be established as early as at conception and continues through motherhood, even as the child becomes an adult.

 Not everyone believes maternal instinct exists, and some research suggests it is a learned behaviour, not an instinct. But you cannot deny the impulse that drives a Mum to act for their baby, make sacrifices to look after them and defend them without thinking.

Interestingly, there has been a fair amount of research on whether maternal instincts are an inbuilt reaction to motherhood, or something that develops when you form a bond with your baby. There have also been studies involving fathers and their measure of the male equivalent. But these studies usually involve primates and cite human babies “plumpness and cute smiles” as main reasons for a parents desire to spend more time with their offspring and therefore develop a need to protect and provide for. I don’t know about you, but I would feel the same crazy mother-lioness instinct to look after any of my babies even if they weren’t so roly-poly and didn’t smile so sweetly!

And what about Dads? Is there such a thing as paternal instinct? The long-running jokes about Dad’s inability to hear baby crying at night, acknowledge fighting toddlers or backchatting teenagers may have some substance, but surely your child’s paternity provider must possess some of this parental compulsion? Men are traditionally seen as the protectors, but do they display the same kind of fierceness a mother does when it comes to the safety and wellbeing of her babies?

And what if you feel like you don’t possess this ‘magical gift’? A lot of new mothers say they feel anxious about their inability to bond deeply with their baby, and that they simply do not feel that motherly instinct. Deep bonds are built over time, and for some women it can take a while to feel the way they feel they should.

The strong bond that you have with your baby doesn’t mean that you always know what to do, and the debate as to whether this is what makes us protect our children the way we do is a hot topic amongst mothers worldwide. Whether you feel instantly connected with your baby and feel the urge to safeguard them intensely or it takes a little more time, it is by no means an indication of your value and love as a parent. In built instinct or learned behaviour, mothers will go to the longest of lengths to care for and protect their children.

What Maternal Instincts do you display?