35 Excuses to Avoid SexAhem, I have a headache........

  • Life
  • 35 Excuses to Avoid Sex

Now we all know that sex is good for the body and soul, but sometimes you just don’t want to go there.

So we give out excuses just because we’re not in the mood for it.

Here are the most common ones I’ve used to avoid sex – which ones have you used as well? Let us know in the comments!

via onedio.co

1. Darling, I have a headache.

2. Honey we can’t have sex, your mother is in the house (this works for any relative).

3. Red Card him!

It’s that time of month again, to really make sure this really hits home you say “I am pouring blood at the moment.”
Just make sure you leave at least 2 and half weeks between this one.

via giphy.com

4. ‘Game of Thrones’ is on!

5. I have to get up early in the morning.

6. I just don’t feel like it tonight – can’t we just cuddle.

via sacratomatovillepost.com

7. I ate too much dairy today.

8. I’m having a Pap Smear tomorrow and want it unsoiled.

9. I had a Pap Smear today and I don’t need any more ‘fingers’ in that pie… or I’m sore from the Pap Smear.

10 Reasons Why I Hate Being A Woman | Stay At Home Mum
via gurl.com

10. I just pooped, I don’t feel like having sex now.

11. I’m still a bit tender from last night.

12. I ate too much food.

via tenor.com

13. I have a yeast infection.

14. I have a urinary tract infection.

15. My breath is bad. I think I ate too much garlic/onion.

16. I’m too drunk.

via gifer.com

17. But it’s not Saturday or Wednesday?

18. I just changed the sheets.

19. I have a funny tummy at the moment.

via bustle.com

20. “I’m too scared I’ll fart” – look embarrassed, he’ll feel bad for you.

21. “We should have come to bed half an hour earlier if you wanted to do this tonight.”

roll over, he can’t argue.

22. “I’m due for a wax tomorrow, and she can tell.”

via tenor.com

23. My uterus is trying to eat me. (Roll around on the floor for extra emphasis.)

24. The dog’s watching, I can’t perform with an audience *sashay out of the room*

25. I pulled a muscle in my leg, the pain is killing me. This can actually give you a few days off.

via bustle.com

26. I am too tired. Tomorrow, hopefully I should be ok.

27. I haven’t had a shower.

This one comes with a risk, usually a “oh good lets shower together” in which case refer back to number 3.

28. I am feeling too fat, must be number 3 about to start.

29. I am PMS-ing and if you touch me I WILL kill you.

via boredbug.com

30. I think I pulled a vaginal muscle last night with you.

31. I have just had my hair done and don’t want it messed up.

32. The bed squeaks too much.

via theloop.ca

33. The kids might hear us, I think they are still awake

35. I need to landscape down there, it is a jungle.

…….and we even made an “excuses” video! hahahahaha! Check it out!!

Have a sex-related question? Ask Stay at Home Mum!

 

Related Articles

Study Reveals Mums Spend A Whopping 24 HOURS A WEEK On Chores

Some Ladies Rack Up A Tiring 51 Hours On Housework

10+ Best Australian Dating Websites

5 Reasons to Give Online Dating A Red Hot Go