Where’s the romance gone you ask? Not sure if you took it out with the last bucket of nappies or if hubby just wiped it off his shirt with all that baby vomit? Filling your cup with romance while the kids run around trying to knock it over is challenging.
It’s certainly not that you don’t love each other anymore, it’s more that there hasn’t been many times where the stars of mutual randi-ness, not feeling too frazzled, and all children being asleep in their own beds – actually aligned in the past few years.
Romance begins with feeling good within yourself and feeling connected to your partner, feeling close to them and like the other person is listening to you.
Bringing back the romance to a relationship with kids is about making the effort to get those stars aligned and then taking advantage where you can!
Try these ideas to bring back the romance:
Little Things Matter
Leaving notes to say I love you or have a great day or calling during the day just to say hello are small efforts to brighten the day. Start each day with a good morning and snuggle before leaving bed, even if you’re not alone!
Grand romantic gestures are nice, but if one half of the couple has some underlying resentment, then any gift is pointless. The stronger the connection between you and your partner the easier it is to weather the storms. Dealing with your issues personally or head on with your partner will lessen any strain and open up the lines of communication – and reception to romantic notions.
For some women, separating maternal and sexual roles can be difficult. Others just crave personal space after a day filled with toddlers clambering all over you. Rekindling physical contact whether it be kissing, hugging or holding hands, is a simple way to show your other half how you feel and is a good starting point no matter how strained things may have been. Taking things slowly and starting small is the key to overcoming big hurdles. Massage is a great way to connect and relax together.
Do Something Together
Plan a trip or join a group. Have a joint interest to enjoy together.
Do Something Apart
Time apart is just as important as time together. If you’re in each other’s pockets all the time, nerves can fray and conversation topics run dry. Separate interests mean meeting new friends and having experiences to share, which only gives you more to talk about!
Get Out On A Date
Or have one at home, but make time together to have fun.
Everyone loves compliments, it makes them feel special and appreciated.
Flirting makes you feel good and sets the heart racing. Sex is a special bond which serves to strengthen the relationship between partners. Resisting the urge to swat a wandering hand could result in a lot of fun relationship rebuilding and let’s face it – an opportunistic approach is required with kids about!
Have Surprises For Each Other.
Unexpected gestures demonstrate you care and add spark to the relationship.
Make A Romantic Effort Every Day
One-off grand gestures mean nothing if nothing changes day to day. Bringing a little bit of romance into every day is the key to maintaining a strong connection and rewarding relationship.