Aha, the old “I’ll show you mine if you show me yours!” Except that it would still be nice to be asked to participate in such a thing before being sent graphic penis pictures out of the blue.
Ley says that some guys actually get off on the thrill of sending the photo and are probably rubbing one out knowing that women are likely to be disgusted or upset after receiving it:
“It’s probable that at least some of these men receive a sexual thrill at the idea of an unknown woman seeing their genitalia. It may be an aspect of exhibitionism, and some of these men probably masturbate a part of the act, imagining that woman seeing the picture they sent. The fact that a woman rejects them for it is not salient, because for many such men, it is the woman’s disgust and rejection which is actually part of the turn-on,” he wrote.
He says that for some men, they do it as an ego-boost because they’re scared of rejection later, which is probably self-fulfilling because they’ll often end up being rejected by women who don’t appreciate their creepy advances:
“Men fear sexual rejection, and by sending pics of their genitalia, they are almost getting “pre-approval.” This way, they get the chance of rejection out of the way early, so they don’t have to worry about being rejected or shamed once they drop their pants on a real date,” he says.
“But by sending an unwanted dick picture, you are showing us that you feel entitled to a woman’s response to your ego and sexual wants,” she writes.
You are reasserting the patriarchal status quo that we are supposed to be sexual servants always ready to accept your invitation to sex. Just because we have learned that these behaviors are normal and regular doesn’t make them right or acceptable.
When you send an unwanted dick pic, you are forcing someone into a sexual situation they did not consent to.”
Women are much more likely to be interested in men if they find them funny, intelligent, good conversationalists. Yes, of course, looks come into play as well but we’re more likely to look at other aspects before we want to eyeball the schlong.
And yes, some women probably do enjoy looking at dick pics. More power to them. But unless a woman says “yes, I would like to see a picture of your throbbing manhood” then fellas, just put your camera phone down and keep it to yourself.