5 Green Juice Recipes That Don’t Taste Like Arse

In my quest to get well after suffering a never ending barrage of colds, flus and even pneumonia, I thought I’d jump on the juice and smoothie bandwagon.

Slight hitch to my health kick — green juices taste like arse.

I know I’m supposed to be a grown up and not hike my nose at the waft of a green vege, but if I wanted to taste something reminiscent of a hobo’s bum, I’d go straight to the source.

So in an attempt to have some liquid variety, I’ve road-tested a tonne of different recipes, some worked and some definitely didn’t. And then some ended up red because I added beetroot because, a) I like it, and b) I got bloody sick of green.

Here are my top 5 Green Juice Recipes:

1. Avocado Blueberry Detox Smoothie

Since it is recommended that we have 5 servings of fruit and vegetables per day, this smoothie is a great start to your morning because of the antioxidants it possesses. This smoothie is also known to render your skin glowing and supple!



2. Pineapple Green Smoothie 

Having digestive problems might allow you to cut out from your daily intake of leafy greens. This pineapple and leafy greens smoothie will allow your body some vegetables without compromising your bowels. Putting in spinach in this smoothie is your secret weapon.


3. Iron and Vitamin C Boosting Green Juice

Did you know that you could increase your iron intake and prevent anemia just by drinking this green stuff? Iron could be attained by taking in the green pigment found in most plants and vegetables called chlorophyll. Meanwhile, iron needs vitamin C to be fully absorbed my the body. This cool concoction has both the healthy qualities of iron and vitamin C.

Green smoothie in a jar downward view

4. Lean Green Power Juice

Still looking forward to losing some weight? This lean green power juice might do the trick! The secret is ingesting more greens and less meat.


1/2 pineapple, peeled, cored, and chopped
1/2 English cucumber, peeled, and chopped
1/2 ripe pear, peeled, cored, and chopped
Juice from 1 lime
1 cup baby spinach leaves
10 mint leaves, chopped
1 tsp agave nectar
Crushed ice

5. Healthy Colada Green Juice

Can you believe that there’s a healthy version of a Pina Colada? Yep, and you can make it at home! Replacing rum and sugar with cucumber and celery will surely do your bikini body some good.


1 cucumber
1 heart of romaine lettuce
3 celery sticks
4 cups ripe pineapple
1-inch piece ginger
1/2 cup coconut water

What are your go-to smoothie recipes?

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Cherie Bobbins

Cherie Bobbins creates an authentic account of motherhood from the front-lines with a central theme of empowering other mothers through Cherie's first...Read More hand experiences. Her aim for every piece of content created is to serve someone, sparking them to exclaim, "OMG, Cherie Bobbins totally gets me, it's exactly what I needed and I am not alone!" Residing in Melbourne, experiencing four seasons in one day, Cherie has had an overflowing, clean basket of laundry on rotation since January 2015. Cherie is a life hacker, professional laundry dodger and mother of two. Read Less

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