So you’re pregnant – congratulations! What a wonderful new phase of your life.
Life is not all it appears to be in the movies though. Life can be hard, life can be strange and life can be GROSS!!
In your mind once you fall pregnant, you will be glowing. You will look so ethereal with your baby belly, you may get a little morning sickness, but that passes in days, and your mother in law is fully supportive of all of your decisions. There is the crippling first labour pain that hits out of the blue, a bit of sweating and grunting then BAM!. Your baby is out. Happy days. Sure labour looks a little scary but you’ve got this right?!
Sure it can all be like that. The reality is, a lot of women experience pregnancy and labour in a whole different way.
If you’re thinking about conceiving or have just found out you’re pregnant, hell – even if you’re a parent trying to scare the living bejeesus out of your teens as a bonus round for the contraception talks, take note. Pregnancy and Labour have a dark side, scary, shocking and even just plain freaking gross!
Don’t believe me yet? Well, take a look through our ten gross facts about pregnancy and labour that no one told you about!
1. That Cute Pair Of Expensive ‘Treat’ Shoes You Just Bought – More Than Likely Aren’t Going To Fit Ever Again
Excess pressure on your feet combined with ligaments relaxing in your body thanks to the pregnancy hormone Relaxin, can result in your feet expanding up to a whole shoe size. While swelling may subside after pregnancy, if your feet have spread due to ligaments going all loosy goosey, you can kiss that cute size seven foot goodbye. You’re now in the major leagues. If you were a size 9-10, you’d better start your search for the elusive 10-11 sized shoes. It’s a whole new world out there now.
Oh and a little ray of sunshine – with each pregnancy, there is a real chance your feet may continue to spread. Goodbye cute girly girly shoes, hello sensible, supportive, sturdy shoes. This is by no means any excuse to opt out of life and just plod around Crocs. There is no excuse for that!
2. Your Belly Isn’t The Only Thing That’s Swelling
Oh hello swollen labia. Due to the increase of blood being directed to your uterus, the tissues in your vaginal walls and external genetalia also cop a hit. You may now be presented with a potentially lopsided, bruised, lumpy and even sore vagina (well it’s technically your labia). No more ‘fitted’ pants for you – unless you want that supersized camel toe being the feature!
3. Peeing Yourself, And Not Just Because You’ve Heard A Good Joke
You will probably be running to the toilet every 2 minutes due to the extra pressure on your bladder from poking little arms legs and well just a whole little human doing a bloody gymnastic routine in there. If you make it to the toilet without letting loose, don’t get too confident. You may want to get a supply of panty liners on standby as a glimpse of your 80yr old self is presented and you may now, well, drip a little when you laugh, sneeze or lift something. You are going to want to take note of these three words. Pelvic Floor Exercises.
4. Women ‘Glow’ During Pregnancy
This is due to the increased blood flow during pregnancy – you can look amazing and healthy and well, glowing. What they fail to tell you is that you may also start getting blotching on your face, due to the increases Melanin, add to that possible skin tags popping out all over your body. Random fleshy flaps of skin are just hanging around. Oh and also – you may be lucky enough also to get a rash. Referred to as PUPPP (Pruritic Urticarial Papules and Plaques of Pregnancy) which is a hive like rash driving you absolutely bonkers with an itch. Starts as bumpy itchy papules that turn to red scalded like skin with welts. It starts on the abdomen but then can spread to other parts of the body. You will be glowing alright – though more like a fire engine.