10 Reasons Why People Have Affairs

5 min read
10 Reasons Why People Have Affairs

It’s estimated that about 70% of all marriages will experience an affair.

That statistic is huge.

The aftermath of infidelity can range from ongoing trust issues to full out divorce, depending on the situation and how the couple involved feel about it.

Psychologists say men and women will cheat for different reasons, with men more often than not cheating for sexual reasons and women cheating for more emotional ones. But that isn’t always strictly true. By and large, regardless of gender, these are some of the top reasons why people will stray from their partners:

1. To fulfill sexual needs not being met in their relationship

Both men and women can cheat for this reason – if sex isn’t happening as often as one spouse may want, this can lead them to seeking it outside of the relationship. There are lots of reasons sex might dwindle over the years – work and kids can place demands on couples and they start to find they don’t have as much time for each other as they used to have.

In other cases, one partner’s sex drive might be much lower than the other partner’s and they might be happy having sex rarely, while the other one wants it much more frequently. Other times, one spouse might have a medical issue such as erectile dysfunction, and the other half isn’t willing to go without. And sometimes, one partner might be into different sorts of sexual activities to the other one, and the only way they can get this is outside of their relationship.

2. To fulfill emotional needs not being met in their relationship

10 Reasons Why People Have Affairs | Stay At Home Mum

Some people who cheat are craving more intimacy than they get with their other half, so they look outside the relationship to find that. For these people, the affair isn’t necessarily about having sex, but about an emotional connection.

3. They’ve fallen in love with someone else

Even though a couple can be happy and committed to each other in a relationship, sometimes, one half of the couple might fall for someone else – even if they weren’t planning on it.

The office fling, for example, is one of these situations — two people working closely together suddenly develop feelings for one another, even if one or both of them are in relationships already.

4. To escape from reality

For some, an affair offers an escape from the everyday grind.

They can forget about all the normal, routine things that consume their lives while they are with their partner – bills, chores, kids, and only focus on more exciting things like wining and dining and sex while they are with their affair partners.

For some, an affair offers an escape from the everyday grind.

5. Ego boost

If someone is feeling under-appreciated by their spouse and doesn’t feel attractive, having an affair with someone who makes them feel sexually desired can boost their ego and make them feel worthwhile and desirable.

6. As a way out of the current relationship

Some people know they want out of their current relationship but don’t have the courage to actually press the escape button and leave. In these instances, they may begin an affair because they actually want to get caught, and presumably their other half will leave them instead.

1297348189895 ORIGINAL e1445916619792 | Stay at Home
via Bigstock

7. Sex addiction

It might seem like a major cop out, but sex addiction is a real thing and people who are afflicted with it are like people addicted to alcohol and drugs – meaning, they will seek it out and worry about the consequences later, if at all. The end result is that this addiction, like other addictions, can be damaging and often fatal to a relationship.

8. Revenge

When there’s bad blood in a relationship, sometimes, one spouse will cheat on the other one to get revenge. This can be revenge for their partner’s own infidelity, or just as “pay back” for any other mistreatment or bad behaviour. They see cheating with someone else as punishment for their other half.

science of sexual attraction 1101707 TwoByOne | Stay at Home
via Bigstock

9. For the thrill of it

Some people engage in risky behaviour for the sheer thrill of it. Cheating on a partner can give these people an adrenaline rush from all the sneaking around. Even though they know its wrong, they can get off on the thrill of taking the risk.

10. They weren’t ready for commitment

This is a common reason for infidelity among couples who didn’t have a lot of prior relationships before meeting their significant other. For example, the couples who were high school sweethearts and together for 20 years and have never had sex with anyone else, sometimes, one of the partners will start to wonder what they may have missed out on.

Regardless of the reasons for the affair, the result is usually the same – broken trust, broken heart and recovery can be very difficult and may ultimately lead to the end of the relationship.

What can you say about infidelity and people having affairs?

Reasons Why People Have Affairs | Stay at Home Mum

About Author

Caroline Duncan

Caroline Duncan is a freelance journalist and photographer with almost 20 years' media experience in radio, magazines and online. She is also a mother...Read More of three daughters, and when she's not writing or taking pictures, she's extremely busy operating a taxi service running them around to various activities. She can't sew and hates housework. Read Less

Close sidebar