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Should I leave my husband?

Answered 2 days ago

I’m pregnant and my husband keeps partying too much. I’ve asked him to calm down, not stop just calm down. But he hasn’t. Tonight he asked if his friends could come over. I said of course but I don’t want anything crazy just because today was the first day feeling upset or emotional In my pregnancy (I’ve been very lucky) and also experiencing Braxton Hicks contractions. This ended up with him PARO. Throwing glass beer bottles around my backyard (I have a dog). I asked him to stop repeatedly. He just called me a bitch. He also lightly spat at me twice. Kept trying to hug me, which results in him falling all over me and knocking me. He’s now passed out in bed. This isn’t a every night issue and sometimes he is great but on weekends it’s becoming more often. I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m not a nagger or anything I couldn’t be much more relaxed but his actions are bothering me more and more. I have explained how I feel but he doesn’t listen. He said she excited for the baby, we planned to have together. But he spends more time watching videos than trying to help me or putting in any research into our unborn child. He also refusing to be intimate with me while pregnant. Is this normal or not?

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Answers

ANSWER
1 month ago
NONE of his behaviour is normal or acceptable. He spat at you (doesn’t matter whether it’s “lightly” or a full on slag - he’s still spitting at you), called you a bitch, and he’s refusing to listen to anything you have to say. It doesn’t matter whether this happens just on weekends or every night. It’s very clear he doesn’t respect you or your wishes. You and your baby deserve better.

REPLY
1 hour ago
I agree with this 100%. Not good enough at all. Appalling

ANSWER
2 days ago
If he won't stop drinking for you and the baby leave him.
Bitch is where the line is crossed no matter what substance was involved.
If you trust him you can of course share custody.

ANSWER
4 days ago
I have a similar situation, I’m 8 years and 2 children in and it’s changed a lot but when he wants to piss me off or get at me he will go on a bender just to prove that he can, then comes the drunken rants, smashing things and name calling.
My advice is run now, set a standard for you and your baby.
I’m in the process of leaving, 8 years of putting up with this shit is exhausting.

ANSWER
4 days ago
Get out now. Do not allow this child to be a father to your child.

ANSWER
1 month ago
Life will not become easier once the baby comes. Does he intend to keep up the partying with a newborn? Is he truly ready to be a father? It’s life changing .

He sounds like he has zero respect for you. Calling you a bitch? Spitting at you? WTF?

As for the lack of intimacy, yes not unusual at all for a man to feel that way. My husband was afraid of hurting our baby and we didn’t have sex for most of both my pregnancies. Our sex life returned to normal after. Some men just don’t find pregnancy attractive, as hard as that is for the pregnant woman. But it’s fact.

Saying sorry is not enough. Actions speak louder than words. A baby is coming. This involves responsibility. If he doesn’t change I personally,‘would be out of there.

ANSWER
1 month ago
Only you can decide if you leave, but look into the future - is this what you want to see? Doing it all while he watches TV or parties, spits at you, tells you to shut up because you asked him to keep it down because you're trying to put the baby down to sleep? Do you realise that behaviour can escalate?

I think you know you deserve better. I'd be leaving & telling him you will not tolerate being spat on, called a bitch & your needs being ignored. No apologies accepted, if he wants another chance he can stop drinking, start listening & do his part with the baby & then come back once he's sorted. If he ever starts again you'll be out. Be prepared for him to choose partying over you, though.

Too many women let themselves get 'trapped' into thinking they shouldn't leave & put up with abuse & being miserable.

ANSWER
1 month ago
This is very toxic sounding and his lack of awareness or consideration for your feelings is to me the biggest issue of all. Is this something you want your child to grow up seeing? You’re not nagging when you have boundaries in a relationship and if your boundaries cannot be respected then you have to consider if you want to be with someone who doesn’t treat you like an equal partner.