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Going to court

My ex doesn’t do much with our 3 kids aged 8,10,12
They sit at his place playing video games or on iPad or watch Foxtel sport and eat take away and sweets
The kids go to bed when they want to
If you were me would you take him to court ?

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Answers (20)

Im pretty shocked at the number of parents on here who don’t see how important routine, consistency and structure are for childrens life time outcomes.
I agree it’s not court worthy but I definitely wouldn’t be impressed if I was op either. I can only imagine how feral the children are when they come home to her after a free for all at dads house.
Dad will probably always be a lazy parent so I don’t see any short term relief for you op.

 Just remember Mum doesn't stay at Dad's nor is she there. To be honest she truly has no idea what happens at his house.
helpful (2) 
 Fu****g routine, come back when you've seen a kid completely lose her shit when something isn't routine. Predictably breeds anxiety. Life isn't always predictable.
helpful (4) 
 I find the ones who preach routine usually never have one anyway. They portray an image of perfect mother when really sitting behind their screen, is a dump of a house, kids running fucken crazy and a lazy mother
helpful (4) 

My mum and her siblings spend time with dad in the pub
Dad would go their afternoon with mates and mum and her siblings would sit in the corner crying or reading a book or colouring in

 I loved going to the pub with my dad. He’d give me all the chips and coke I wanted. He’d sit with me and my siblings.
helpful (1) 
 Well that’s great for you but irrelevant to the previous responder?!
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 I think they're trying to point out that she doesn't have any real problems but you knew already didn't you cheeky? You just don't agree so you just want to have a crack at everyone who does.
helpful (2) 

I would have if it made any difference.
I spoke to my ex about how it's good for the boys to to eat junk food and keep the couped up inside all weekend, but was ignored. It just made me be a better mum. I made sure my kids were well fed and got to play outside and had lots of fun. We all got mountain bikes and ended up having so much fun on my weekends the boys started to refuse to go to their dads. They still see their dad but don't have regular access anymore. He has no one to blame but himself.

 Oh so it’s a competition is it... are you proud of that making your children hate going to their dads. You’re nasty
helpful (2) 
 Parenting isn’t about making kids hate their dad
helpful (1) 
 I didn't make them hate their dad. He wasn't a very good parent, the kids got left with his elderly parents a lot of the time, he fed them takeaway, wouldn't let them play as he didn't want mess, they did nothing all weekend and they are active kids. I made the most of my time with them, and I found something they loved. Their dad chose to ignore their requests to do something fun, so they didn't want to go anymore. He alienated them himself. The kids see him on their terms now, it's not about dad it's about the kids.
helpful (0) 

No, just slowly restrict access. We went through this and the kids couldn't live like that every other weekend. I got my kids involved in sport which dad wouldn't take them too, so rather than Friday night until Monday morning it was Saturday afternoon until Sunday lunch time.

 That my friend is a contravention, vexatious and a good way to lose custody, be fined and face jail Under the family law act!


helpful (5) 
 For letting kids play sport on the weekend, for making Monday his responsibility? This is on him.
helpful (0) 
 If there is a court order you can’t just change and tell him unless he agrees. Especially because you’re being vexatious. He’s spending time with his kids get a life
helpful (5) 
 I’ve just been through the federal circuit court and was told by judge Jarrett. Sport is not a reason for a child to miss out on time with dad and that you can’t just make changes because you don’t like what he does!
helpful (5) 
 No court order, the kids playing sport (which they want to do) is more important.
helpful (0) 
 I have a court order that includes kids being taken to sport.
helpful (1) 
 Ok lady you go tell a judge kids playing sport is more important than seeing dad !!!!!!!!!!!! I WILL PAY TO SEE A JUDGES REACTION WHEN YOU END UP DRAGGED INTO COURT
helpful (3) 
 If your in order great but if it isn’t your in the shit
helpful (4) 
 As long as access isn't stopped because of activities, for example dad's access starts after sport as he wasn't taking them.
helpful (0) 
 Because it’s his time he doesn’t have to and you can’t dictate. That’s why you have shared parental responsibility. To make joint decisions.

It’s his time he doesn’t have to do anything you say. During that time he is the parent

helpful (4) 
 As it states In any order (unless consented in court) that you cannot change nah part of the other without both agreeing to it.

You can’t tell him to pick up the kids after sport and cut his time short unless he says it’s ok also. You may be mum but you don’t make the rules.

helpful (3) 
 No the access starts after sport, it gives the kids some fun before sitting in front of the tv for the remainder of the weekend.
helpful (1) 

That’s men for you, and if you try to explain it to another man (judge) you will genuinely confuse him and it will be thrown back at you.
I don’t think you are control freak at all.
I would pack lunch/dinner for the kids and him and let them have sweets and stay up late.
They will work it out when they are older.
Take the high road. Good luck

 Ha! Do you know how many female judges there are in the family/federal circuit court
helpful (3) 
 Considering the entire court system is biased towards the mother and people are calling for a crown inquiry.... Let dad have his time. You’re both cut from the same cloth. Snarky, vexatious cows
helpful (4) 
 55 Female Judges between Family Court and Federal Circuit which deal with family/divorce and parenting issues

Take a seat you man hater

helpful (4)