View other questions

Ask SAHM is a place where you can ask our staff & community a question safely & anonymously. Please read our disclaimer.

How many of you have tried swinging?

Answered 3 months ago

My husband and I are mid 30s, have four beautiful kids and have been together since high school. We recently had a very unplanned, wine-fueled same-room-sex encounter with some good friends. No swapping, just sex with our respective hubbies in the same room and it was HOT!

Now we are considering taking things further, but are left wondering if there are people who have done this before? If you have, has it made things even more adventurous or did it cause problems later down the track?

TY xx

Have an answer?

2000 characters left.

Answers

ANSWER
5 months ago
It nearly ruined my marriage. I wanted it and hubby thought he wanted it but then realised the fantasy wasn't the same in reality. He gave me a taste of a new life and then quickly took it away...I'll never get that original relationship back.

REPLY
4 months ago
That’s really interesting. Would you mind elaborating on what specifically caused the issues? We are going through the early stages of talking about it, so would love more opinions amd experiences.

REPLY
4 months ago
I am not the OP but I can share a similar situation. My wife and I we really enjoying our sexual adventures. At least two times a month we were attending swinger parties. At first we just had sex with each other in front of strangers which was very hot but then we agreed to try out someone else. The first time we drove for 30 minutes in silence until I blurted out “OMFG that was wild!” She laughed and said “You would be blushing if you saw the horse I was with tonight!” We pulled over 5 minutes later and went crazy on each other. It was better sex than at the party.

This went on for 15 months. She became so adventurous having sex with two and then three guys. I was enjoying my swinging lifestyle too. Then she stopped completely. Just said she didn’t want to anymore. No explanation at all. What’s weird is the weekend before she had sex with 4 guys in a single night (two separate 3sums). She said how amazing it was and she couldn’t wait to do it again. Then nothing. No more swingers clubs, parties, nothing. I asked her if anything was wrong. Did someone find out about our sexual adventures? Nope and no further explanation. I asked her BFF I Dn she knew what was wrong and all she could get out of my wife was that she started to develop a kink she didn’t want to live for. The BFF couldn’t get my wife to spill it. So I met the BFF and asked her to find out anything she could. As it turns out my wife’s 3sums were with only black men. As the BFF put it “VERY Large Black Men” and she didn’t mean their height.

So now the only way to get my wife excited about sex is to either talk about black men’s large d*icks or IR Porn.

REPLY
2 months ago
This is exactly what happened in my marriage and I miss the social connections with other couples and the flirting - hubby wasn’t confident in naked situations with other males and is very picky with females. Oh well back to boring old married sex

ANSWER
3 months ago
My husband and I had friends over for the "same room sex" scenario. That was all we planned to do.

Once we were starting things went a bit further. Each of our husbands was lying on our bed, with me and the other wife giving our own husbands a blowjob.

The other husband was watching me alot, and started fondling my boobs (well, one - thats all he could reach).

It went from there, and we ended up swapping to blow each others husband. Once I starting sucking the other guy, I could tell both he and my husband got SO MUCH HORNIER. My husband blew his load in my friends mouth (which was amazingly hot to watch), and the guy I was sucking finished on my boobs.

Was a massive boost to our sex lives.

If you are feeling game, and everyone is on the same page, go for it.

**IF YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS HAVING ISSUES, THIS IS NOT THE WAY TO FIX IT!!**

ANSWER
4 months ago
We want to start meeting other couples for soft swaps in the new year. The idea of same room is appealing, but we are also going to open ourselves up to everything except actual intercourse with other married couples and see what happens.

REPLY
3 months ago
Did you end up proceeding?

My hubby and I have done so with similar boundaries.

Me and the other wife ended up giving each others husbands a blowjob - it was the most erotic thing I've ever seen or experienced, especially seeing my husband cum in her mouth (my guy finished on my boobs).

Incredible.

ANSWER
3 months ago
We started swinging with a very close couple friend of ours last year & its been the best thing for my relationship with my hubby.
Our own sex life at home as well as the sex life we have with our friends is amazing.
Hubby & I spoke about what rules we had & watched a 'swing house' TV show about 1st timers to see what it was all about before doing it.
Will definitely be looking into doing it more in the future.

ANSWER
4 months ago
Our experience was very good until it wasn’t.

We kind of fell into 3sums and swinging by accident. My BFF was staying with us for a few months and a few weeks into her being there it just happened one night. It was intense and amazing. Me and my BFF and my husband and my BFF. Then the 3 of us decided to drive 100 miles away to a swingers club. We researched it and met a few other couples online. The day of the big event the 3 of us all showered and looking delicious headed out. When we go there I immediately saw a man that I had to have. After some chatting between me, my husband, my BFF and the man, he took me by the arm and led me to a room. OMG he was so talented and strong. He used me as his personal toy for over an hour. And I loved every moment of it. Once he was done with me he smacked my ass and told me to come find him later as he wasn’t done with me yet. Jelly legged I wandered out of the room and began looking for either my husband or BFF. I found them together with a tiny little blonde woman. They were all twisted together and it was HOT. The 3 of us did this a few more times and then my husband and I started going without my BFF as she reconciled with her husband. After nearly a year of visiting swingers clubs and meeting some great people my husband decided to start fucking one of the woman without telling me. I found out one day when he forgot to log out of his Facebook messenger.

So I started cheating and then he was cheating more so I cheated more and then it all stopped after I went to a club one night without him. 7 guys in a night 3 at the same time. When I got home I was really used and he left.

A couple of weeks later we reconciled but I can’t forget how amazing it was to be with so many men in one night.

ANSWER
6 months ago
I've always wanted to at least try it but hubby "doesn't want to share" He's older and not as adventurous as I am and it kind of annoys me

ANSWER
6 months ago
Where do we sign up ??

REPLY
6 months ago
Haha, well on the off chance you’re in Perth there has to be some way we could communicate? 😝

ANSWER
6 months ago
Similar story.

My husband and his friends were playing poker. Hubby was losing and one of his mates "joked" that hubbys bet could be a handjob from me. So turns out he lost that hand. I was really annoyed and the guys all thought it was really funny - right up until I told the friend who won to pull his chair out. I kneeled between his legs and gave him the best handjob I could - and he had a massive ejaculation in my hand.

My husband was astonished and annoyed, but I think very turned on too.

Needless to say, nobody thought I would do it but they wont make that bet again!

(No, the guy I jerked wasnt in a relationship).

ANSWER
6 months ago
So. Jealous.

Please tell me how you got the same room sex started. It’s something I’ve wanted to do so much!!

REPLY
6 months ago
We were playing cards, and somewhere along the line it turned into strip-poker...then when everyone was naked it somehow turned into a game of dates and then it just happened. Yes, it was quite a thrill actually!!

REPLY
6 months ago
I need better friends! Mine are so tame we would struggle to even have a regular game of poker!