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Pree teen help

Answered 7 months ago

My 12yo boy is an absolute nightmare. He can be this sweet, helpful, funny kid. But as soon as he doesn't get his way he is horrible, swears,yells screams. He says not to take it personally when we talk about after and that he was just angry. He just said to me that if I'm nice to him he won't get upset, I asked what me being nice to him looked like for him and it was just let me do what I want to do. A lot of our trouble is around games (rocket league) we've always been strict on time limits, only have one tv in the house. I'm just lost, I feel myself resenting him I think about leaving the family because of it. I grew up in a really abusive household and have done everything I can not to let my children experience it but here he is flying Off the handle over the smallest things, they aren't overly spoilled, they do jobs. The boy is super helpful around the house, is always the first to help out etc, keeps room clean, puts washing on, feeds pets. Good feedback from school, friends etc. But it's like a switch flicks and he's a Monster. Has anyone else seen this? Is it hormones? I don't want to make him feel like there's something wrong with him but I can't keep up with it like this.

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7 months ago
I think you should get some advice from a professional before things get out of hand. Xx

7 months ago
As an outsider looking in, have you considered negotiating with him regarding his time limits? Like sit down together and discuss (that means he gets to safely contribute to the conversation without fear of repercussions - within reason) what he can do to earn more screen time? Perhaps he has some ideas himself but doesn't know how to bring it up.
I remember at that age being able to negotiate some things really helped me understand things better. It also made me stop and see that my parents were giving me a chance to grow and learn in a mature and safe environment. They were treating me with the same respect they would an adult, so I felt the need to behave like one and show them the same level of respect.
Or is there a way you can bond over the game so he can see it as a family activity? Sorry, I'm unfamiliar with Rocket League.