Ask SAHM is a place where you can ask our staff & community a question safely & anonymously. Please read our disclaimer.

I need advice on how to deal with a partner who has depression, it’s getting to the point where they are bringing me down, because their insecurities are so bad, that I constantly need to reassure them of my love, it’s becoming toxic, but I’m still willing to try,

Back story is we both come from long term relationships that ended badly, so we each have our insecurities which tend to clash, I try and see the positives and he just focuses on the negatives!

Report

Got an Answer?


Answers (4)

I think it might be time to leave. You are not responsible for his happiness. Only yours. Good luck x

He has gone to counselling once and I think is going back! I try to suggest things but he flips everything I say into a negative, it’s exhausting

 Would you stay with this person if this same thing continues? Or are you relying on change for this relationship to work? You have to look after you, too. If it’s not doing you good you have to consider how much you want it.
helpful (0) 
 I am relying on a change, because when we are good, it’s the best, in saying that the odds are stacked against us because we don’t even live in the same town, and the distance is also a killer! I know many will say abort mission but I just can’t do it, it’s a tricky situation
helpful (0) 

Can you try referring them to counselling? Do you know what they enjoy in life or passions? Suggest to do something different as what’s happening currently isn’t working.