Ask SAHM is a place where you can ask our staff & community a question safely & anonymously. Please read our disclaimer.

I hate mumming.

I love my kids and spending time with them but fuck me I hate all the bullshit that goes with it. I hate going to sports. I hate organising parties. I hate going to assemblies. I hate school musicals. I hate having to volunteer at the Bunnings sausage sizzle. I can't wait for this tedious shit to end. No question, just a rant.


Got an Answer?

Answers (7)

I hear you. My kids love that I attend certain things so I do it for them but I hate some of it too. I help with reading groups while my kids are in prep. Roll on year 1 for my youngest as I can't stand it but she (they all have) love having me there. No more making up hours of work 😁

I used to do all the activities and sports but then became full time shift working bread winner, I attend nothing, take them to nothing, and used to feel like the worst parent ever. But you know, 3/4s of the time they don't care, and if it's really important I try to attend. They at the age where everything is about friends and socialising anyway now

don't do it, simple

OP My god..... why did I not think of this?
helpful (2) 

Yes, I agree. One side of parenting I don’t really enjoy.

You... you know they don't HAVE to do sports and parties and Bunnings stuff, don't you? Why not take a year off from all the extra curriculars to concentrate on spending more time as a family? Well, that's the excuse I'd be dishing out to them anyway 😉

My kids no longer do any extras (they've only ever done swimming lessons) and the relief has been great. 3 kids in different timed swimming lessons was too muc for me. It was crazy. We were stressed out and not spending quality time together because of everyones conflicting schedules (the place didn't have the same days for each group). Since we've quit the lessons, we've been spending time together re-exploring our local area. Taking the kids around to the different sights and attractions and watching spring roll in on the local flora.
Hiking, biking, beach days, picnics, mystery drives, fruit picking, foraging, are all great things to do instead of volunteering at Bunnings.

OP I... I know that I don't HAVE to... And for the most part we don't. I know other mums love watching assemblies and being P&C mums but I don't. I also have other commitments like work and study so I have experienced my kids in tears and having to say no when it is their class assembly or music night and I can't go.
helpful (0) 
 So stop doing it. I know initially your kids will be upset. But if you swoop in with some of the ideas I mentioned, or even something better suited to your family, they'll soon let go of it. You need to take time for you too. If you're working, studying, taxi-ing kids to sports and entertainment all the time you're going to burn out. Please, take some time off from what you can. Even if you just take a few weeks off from after schools/weekend activities, you'll come back feeling much more refreshed.
helpful (0) 
 PS those women who enjoy the P&C are either cyborgs, psychos, or they have some kind of crazy agenda. No one likes the P&C it's boring as shit.

Calm down cyborgs, don't attack me yet! You'll have to catch me first.

helpful (2) 
 Most people join the p & c because they want something addressed and then they get stuck there Haha.
I dont think people who enjoy it are cyborgs, i think they are more wanna be politicians who like the control.

helpful (0) 
 My kids accept that I can't come to everything. I take time off work for special things but they know i cant come for just a normal assembly or working in the canteen. They are fine with it and dont get upset. I do help with sports on the weekend cos im not at work so that makes them happy
helpful (0) 
 Wow! Judgey much. I enjoy P&C but am none of the things you mention. We do stuff to improve our kids school and time there. We fund-raise so our kids can go on inter-state excursions and it not cost parents an arm and a leg. We buy valuble equipment for our kids to use (we've just bought new playground eqt for the primary school kids).
I get that many parents cant get involved because of work commitments, and that even some dont enjoy having to bake a cake for a cake sale, or man the ride at the fete. But we arent psychos because we want to help your kid. Suck it up cupcake.

helpful (0) 
 ^cyborgs don't understand humour then? 😂
helpful (1) 

I use to do everything from helping in class to doing p & c and even canteen manager for a period off time, and my eldest did 2 sports and a music lesson so I was at thing 6 out of 7 days, then I had another baby and stopped everything but still don’t get anytime to my self

I get it!I don't mind doing those things and i love to help, but sometimes I get worn down that theres so much of it and some things seem really uneccessarily complicated. I have a pretty hectic work schedule which doesn't help.